Today – April 8, 2024 – a total solar eclipse will pass over Mexico, the United States, and Canada. Many of the ToughPigs staff (and readers!) will be witnessing it, and a few of us have even traveled to experience the eclipse in its direct path. The sky will get dark, the air will get cold, animals will go to sleep. The next total eclipse to hit the United States won’t be until 2044, so it’s a pretty big deal.
But you know what else is a pretty big deal? The Muppets.
I’m gonna be honest, I’m tired of the Muppets being overshadowed by other franchises like Marvel or Star Wars. And now they’re being literally overshadowed by the moon passing between the earth and sun?? No, this won’t do.
Back in 2009, in honor of the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 moon landing, I wrote the “now classic” (source: myself) ToughPigs article “Crater Haters (or, No Praises for Lunar Phases),” in which I argued that Sesame Street hates the moon. And honestly, it’s still all true.
Why doesn’t Ernie want to live on the moon? Because he hates the moon.
Why does Cookie Monster want to eat the moon in “If Moon Were Cookie“? Because he hates the moon.
Why does Elmo want to dance on the moon? Because he is dancing on the grave of his enemies.
I’m gonna add Big Bird to the ever-growing list of moon-haters. Need proof? See this picture below of Big Bird from a PBS interstitial, proving that the moon landing was faked by hanging out with Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin without a space suit or breathing apparatus.
While it seems ridiculous to hate the giant satellite orbiting our planet and controlling our tides, we’ve got to side with Sesame on this one. Take a back seat, the moon, and let the Muppets have the spotlight.
You know who else hates the moon? (Besides you and me and Cookie Monster.) Summer Penguin from the recent Muppet Babies series. She hated the moon so much, she tried to blow it up. Yeah, that’s a real thing that happened.
If that moon were to pass between the Earth and sun, there’d barely be an eclipse. Good job, Summer. You tell that eclipse who’s boss.
And who better to take that spotlight away from the moon than the divine Miss Piggy herself? If anyone’s going to eclipse the eclipse, it’s Piggy’s desire for stardom.
Can you imagine Miss Piggy looking up at the giant glowing orb in the sky and demanding to take its place? I sure can. It’s like she’s been subtly placing herself between us and the moon for years in preparation. Why look at the eclipse when you could be looking at Piggy instead??
Meanwhile, deep underground, the Fraggles of Fraggle Rock took a different approach. Rather than hate the moon or wish for its demise, they seem to fear it, showing reverence as a vengeful deity to worship. Seen in the episode “Capture the Moon,” they sing its praises and then attempt to rescue it after it was stolen by the Gorgs.
Whether the moon is meant to be hated or feared or completely overshadowed, we can’t deny that it’s a pretty big deal. We can only hope that the Muppets will also get their day in the sun. By which I mean, completely covering up the sun to cast a shadow across the planet and cause irreversible eye damage.
Happy eclipse day, Muppet fans!
With thanks to the Muppet Wiki for their highly useful article on the moon!
Click here to go through phases on the ToughPigs Discord!
by Joe Hennes – Joe@ToughPigs.com
