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Transcription provided by Katilyn Miller.
Hubba-Wha?! Episode 307 – Becca Says Boo!
[Clip from The Muppet Show plays]
VINCENT PRICE: Good evening.
[Applause]
VINCENT PRICE: Excuse me, but do you have a room for the night? You see the road has washed out and my horse had a flat tire.
FOZZIE BEAR: [Nervous sounds] Maybe.
VINCENT
PRICE: I must tell you, I am not alone. I am traveling with my beautiful assistant and a hideously deformed monster.
FOZZIE: Oh, hideously deformed is right!
UNCLE DEADLY: Watch it. I’m the beautiful assistant.
GONZO: Oh boy.
[Clip ends]
[Hubba-Wha?! theme music plays]
BECCA PETUNIA: (in echo sounding voice while imitating a vampire) Welcome to Hubba-Wha?! A Muppet Quiz Show Brought To You By ToughPigs.com!
[Thunderclap sound effect]
BECCA: (in normal voice) Alright, I can’t keep that up. It’s your favorite quiz show that’s not like the others! Here, Muppet fans, Muppet professionals, and everyone in between competes for fabulous prizes and to see who’s this week’s Toughest Pig!
I’m your host, Becca Petunia of ToughPigs.com. And this week, we’re celebrating the only thing I like as much as the Muppets: HALLOWEEN! That’s right boys and ghouls, today on (in echo sounding voice) Hubba-Wha?!, (in normal voice) we’re preparing for a magical Halloween adventure of our own as we talk about some tricks and treats from the spooky worlds of that master of horror… (in echo sounding voice) JIM HENSON.
[Thunderclap sound effect]
BECCA: (in normal voice) But seriously, Halloween is as much about cute and silly monsters as it is about Michael Myers and company, so the Muppets have always fit right in. Last season, I did an episode all about Muppet monsters, or I guess mainly about Frazzle.
[Frazzle sound effect]
BECCA: This season, we’re focusing on some different, maybe less-obvious Halloween angles. This meant I really needed to dig deep on Muppet Wiki. And that’s right, as always, today’s questions were written by me, with help from that amazing resource Muppet Wiki. And speaking of, let’s agree to play fair today. Please don’t look at Muppet Wiki, or any other resource, during this game. That’s one trick I won’t allow on Halloween.
Anyway, I’d be a terrible (in echo sounding voice) Ghost Host (in normal voice) if I didn’t let my fiends–I mean friends–introduce themselves. That’s why we’re going to play our first game, (in echo sounding voice) To Tell a Face. (in normal voice) Contestants, buzz in to answer some questions about yourself. Whoever buzzes in first will get introduced first. Ready? Go!
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: All right. Our first contestant, Mike, what is your name?
MIKE WESTFALL: My name is Mike Westfall.
BECCA: Okay. And you know we’re doing this this season because it’s a good thing to do and it’s about time that I started doing it. Mike, what pronouns should we use for you in this recording?
MIKE: He/him is fine. Thank you.
BECCA: Okay. Second question. So Mike, you’re a first-time guest on this podcast and a first time-guest on ToughPigs podcasts in general, so that means I have to ask you, what’s your history with the Muppets?
MIKE: I have heard of the Muppets. [laughs]
[Becca laughs]
MIKE: No. They’ve always been in my consciousness. I grew up with Sesame Street wallpaper in my bedroom. My earliest memory is jumping up and down on the couch and singing along to John Denver and the Muppets a Christmas Together. So they’ve just been permeated throughout my life and they’ve never gone away and I am grateful for it.
BECCA: And, you know, I should say, obviously, there’s always time for plugs at the end of the show, but you have a podcast of your own and you sometimes talk about Muppets on that podcast, including recently Anthony Strand of Toughpigs.com and I were on to talk about Elmo Saves Christmas. So tell us a little bit about your podcast.
MIKE: Sure, it’s a seasonal podcast. It’s called the Advent Calendar House. I call it a salute to all holiday specials but mostly the Christmas ones. And I’m very excited to be on a podcast where 100 percent of the listeners will understand that reference.
BECCA: It’s funny. There’s two episodes I recorded already where one was themed around a salute to all nations, but mostly America and the other was about Muppet*Vision 3D. That’s like three this season where we’ve made that reference. And last question, I’m going to ask you, Mike. What Muppet or Henson puppet do you think is the scariest?
MIKE: Ooh, that’s a good question. I’m going to say when I stared deeply at I think it’s Timmy Monster, he kind of disturbed me as a kid when I would see him on The Muppet Show.
BECCA: That’s fair. That’s a good choice. Anyway, Mike, you have earned yourself 20 points.
MIKE: Hey.
BECCA: Now, our second contestant, Jarrod, what is your name?
JARROD FAIRCLOUGH: My name is Jarrod Fairclough.
BECCA: And Jarrod again just because I think it’s the right thing to do, what pronouns should we use for you?
JARROD: He/him.
BECCA: Allright.
JARROD: Although you can also call me boss.
BECCA: Okay, yeah. Well, I was about to say, you are my boss. Because Jarrod Fairclough, everybody knows what you do for ToughPigs, because you are one of the co-owners of ToughPigs.
JARROD: I am. I managed to weasel my way in.
BECCA: Yeah. So Jarrod instead of asking you what your history with theMuppets is because that’s obvious, you’ve got your own ToughPigs podcast To Introduce Our Guest Star. Everybody knows your history with the Muppets. So instead, you know, I don’t know. Let’s do an impromptu performance review. What should I do better? [laughs]
[Mike laughs]
JARROD: What should you do better? All right. Well, look last time I was on this very podcast with Ryan Roe and I understood you couldn’t play favorites because we’re both your boss.
BECCA: Mmhmm.
JARROD: But you know, he’s not here.
BECCA: Yeah.
JARROD: And Mike, you seem like a lovely man. But you know I haven’t got a, you know, I’ve never been on your podcast. We’ve never met so as far as I’m concerned, I don’t care if I destroy you. So…
[Mike laughs]
JARROD: If yeah Becca, you can like let me win. Then you’ll be like… you’re already within the top of my favorites anyway, but you’ll be, you’ll be slotting right in there above say like Soberman.
BECCA: Okay. I’m gonna just copy in some questions about Emu, the TV show. Right? That’s an Australian TV show. Or is that British?
JARROD: I’ve never heard of it.
BECCA: Okay. Well then I guess it must be British. Then I guess I’ve ruined things again.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
MIKE: Well, I don’t think you’ll have to worry too hard about winning or [laughs].
BECCA: Yeah. No. It’s a British puppet show that I just assumed was Australian because there’s an emu in it. [sighs]
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: Well, there’s a TV show called Emu. It would have been funny if I’d picked one that’s actually from Australia. And Jarrod, which Muppet or Henson puppet do you think is the scariest?
JARROD: I’ve got two answers. The first is season one Ma Gorg is a genuinely terrifying looking puppet. And then I’m also genuinely a little bit terrified of Snuffy. Yeah, I’ve got a genuine like a fear of Snuffy. And I’ve expressed that to Marty Robinson. He thinks it’s very funny. I’ve seen Snuffy in the flesh and he is terrifying. And if you go back and listen to To Introduce Our Guest Star I think with Leslie Carrara-Rudolph, and I think it’s even mentioned in the Marty episode, Marty likes to do a thing where he just gets in the Snuffy puppet and runs full pelt at somebody and then veers off at the last second. And I think if that happened to me, I don’t think I’d recover.
BECCA: I mean, what’s even worse is the old Snuffy puppet, obviously.
MIKE: Yeah, oh, yup. [laughs]
BECCA: I reviewed one of the episodes with that big yellow-eyed Snuffleupagus, when we were doing Sesame Rewind on the site. It was the episode where Big Bird gets vaccinated from the 1970s. I forget what disease he got vaccinated for, but anyway. And yeah, that puppet is real, real bad. And I bet it would be even worse if Marty ran at you in that puppet.
[Mike laughs]
JARROD: Terrifying. Great. Well, there’s nightmares I’ll be having tonight. Thank you.
BECCA: You’re very welcome. I mean, look, it’s Halloween. When we’re recording it, it is definitely Halloween right now.
JARROD: Yes, let’s go along with that.
BECCA: Yeah. Yeah. Anyway…[laughs] so Jarrod you also earned yourself 20 points. And you know, I’m giving those to you because you are my boss. Otherwise I would have given you zero points.
JARROD: Thank you. Thank you very much.
BECCA: But now, let’s open things up by talking about the most Halloweeny Muppet of all. That’s right. I’m talking about Count von Count. After all, nothing is more Halloweeny than math. And vampires. But also math. Anyway the Count has been around for almost 50 years now, or I guess if you believe him, 6,523,728 years.
As a result, there’s a lot to know about him. So we’re going to play a game that I’m calling (in echo sounding voice) The Song of the Count.
[Thunderclap sound effect]
BECCA: (in normal voice) In this game, I’ll ask you questions about The Count. That’s it. Each of these questions is worth two points. Buzz in when you know the answer but please wait until I finish asking the question so our bat friends at home can play along.
Ready? All right, here we go.
[Thunderclap sound effect]
[Clip from Sesame Street plays]
COUNT
VON
COUNT: How do you do? It is I, the Count. They call me The Count because I love to count things.
[Clip ends]
BECCA: Question one. Which Sesame Street writer is credited with creating Count von Count?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: I’m gonna take a guess and say…was Jon Stone a writer? I’m gonna say Jon Stone.
BECCA: It is not Jon Stone but you are my boss. So I’m gonna just say that nicely.
[Jarrod and Mike laugh]
BECCA: It’s definitely a great guess, but it is not Jon Stone.
JARROD: Okay.
BECCA: Mike, do you want to try to steal?
MIKE: I couldn’t begin to guess.
BECCA: All right. It is Norm Stiles.
JARROD: Aagh. He was my… he was…he was.. It was one of the two.
BECCA: Question two. In the Count’s first appearance in 1972, he had a vampiric power that was rarely used in future episodes. What was it?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That I know. He could like hypnotize people with his hands, couldn’t he?
BECCA: Correct, he could. And he used them to hypnotize Bert in that episode. We all know that the Count is a snappy dresser. On which of his eyes does he wear a monocle?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: His left eye?
BECCA: It is his left eye. I was complaining about this yesterday on Twitter.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question four. According to the album, The Count Counts, what is the name of the Count’s Radio station which broadcasts direct from the Sesame Street Studios high above Hooper’s Candy Store?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Is it like, Count 123 or something like that? It feels like it’s going to be something like that.
BECCA: [sighs] Jarrod, I’m gonna give it to you. It is Radio 123. I will give it to you. That is very close. Question five. The Count has had many jobs including as a film director. Which famous Irish actor did he direct in the films Transylvania 6-5000 and Counting in the Rain?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Is it Liam Neeson?
BECCA: It is Liam Neeson, Mike. Correct.
JARROD: Well done.
BECCA: And I do want to say, this quote is on Muppet Wiki. Liam Neeson has said, “I feel like…” I’m not going to do his voice. “I feel like I’ve now worked with the great cinematic masters. Spielberg, Lucas, Rubber Duckie and the Count. My artistic life is complete.”
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question six. Since 2017, the Count’s castle has been given this street number, which makes it the same as Betty Lou’s address from the Sesame Street Treasury. There’s my great Sesame Street Treasury reference for this episode.
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: What’s the Counts house address? That’s also Betty Lou’s house address.
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Is it 456 Sesame Street?
BECCA: It is 456.
MIKE: The only reason I got that was because you gave that Sesame Street Treasury hint.
[Mike and Becca laugh]
BECCA: Because I made such a big deal about it then.
MIKE: Well, I had this Sesame Street Treasury so I remember that.
BECCA: Question seven. The Count appeared in one Sesame Street News Flash sketch where he counted which two famous fairy tale groups?
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: If you can name one.
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: I’m gonna say the seven dwarfs.
BECCA: The seven dwarfs is one. Care to guess the second?
MIKE: I’m gonna guess the three little pigs.
BECCA: That is correct. Drove Kermit crazy, unsurprisingly.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question eight. Unlike most vampires, The Count can be out in sunlight. In fact, he once relaxed on a tropical island and sang a song about counting coconuts. Which celebrity joined him for this song?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Was it like Jimmy Buffett or something?
BECCA: It is not Jimmy Buffett. You’re thinking of Jimmy Buffett singing “Caribbean Amphibian” with–
JARROD: That’s who I’m thinking of, yes.
BECCA: …With Kermit and Jill the Frog on Elmopalooza.
JARROD: I’m never not thinking of that.
BECCA: Yeah, no, I mean… listen I’m gonna do a full Elmopalooza episode one day. Mike do you have a guess?
MIKE: I believe it was Harry Belafonte.
BECCA: It was Harry Belafonte.
JARROD: Yes it was.
BECCA: Friend of the Muppets, Harry Belafonte. Question nine. At different points The Count has had a pet cat and a pet bat with this same silly name. What is it?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: It’s Fatatatina or Tatita?
BECCA: I will give it to you. It’s Fatatita.
MIKE: [laughs] Fatatita.
BECCA: Question 10. The Count is associated with many Countesses, each of whom he is related to in different ways. What is the full name of his main love interest? The Countess.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Is it Countess von Backward?
BECCA: So, Jarrod, I will give you one point.
JARROD: Okay, I’ll take it.
BECCA: He has dated Countess von Backward but less frequently than the other Countess.
JARROD: Okay.
BECCA: So I will give you one point.
JARROD: All right. I’ll take it.
BECCA: They almost never used the name of the Countess who he most often is seen with. I had to look this one up. Mike, do you have a guess?
MIKE: I remember seeing the name Countess Dahling von Dahling.
BECCA: [laughs] Mike, I will give you one point because that is the name of the Countess who is his cousin.
MIKE: Oh.
BECCA: No, the main Countess, the one who appears the most frequently with the Count and is usually just called the Countess, is named Natasha von Numeral.
MIKE: [laughs] Definitely have not heard that one.
JARROD: No.
BECCA: I had not heard that one either. [laughs] And what famous actress and horror movie star did the Count also once take on a date?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That was Julianne Moore.
BECCA: Did that happen?
JARROD: Wasn’t he? He was in a thing with Julianne Moore, definitely.
BECCA: Was he?
JARROD: But I now know who you’re talking about.
BECCA: That wasn’t what I was looking for, but you know what? Let me check. You know, I will give it to you. Because I don’t necessarily know if they were supposed to be on a date. But she was in Far from Seven with the Count, a spoof of Far from Heaven, the Julianne Moore movie. I’ll give you two points. Mike, do you know who I was thinking of in this classic sketch?
MIKE: You might have been thinking of Susan Sarandon.
BECCA: I was thinking of Susan Sarandon. But I will absolutely give Jarrod two points as well for Julianne Moore.
Question 11. In a sitcom parody, the Count is horrified to learn that Countess Natasha von Numeral and Prairie Dawn are using a made-up number instead of a real one. What made up number were they using in this sitcom parody? The number is the sitcom parody.
[Clock ticking sound]
JARROD: I’m trying to think of like a sitcom that had a number in the name.
[Clock ticking stops]
BECCA: All right.
JARROD: I’ve only got Three’s Company in my head.
BECCA: It was not Three’s Company because three is a real number. It was one of my favorite sketches: The Twentysomething sketch where the Count is horrified every time anybody says twentysomething.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Based on what was it? Thirtysomething?
MIKE: Thirtysomething was the show.
BECCA: Yeah. And question 12. Matt Vogel’s Count debuted in an official Sesame Street Youtube video. What important milestone did the Count commemorate in song?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That was one billion views on Youtube for Sesame Street.
BECCA: That was one billion views on Youtube for Sesame Street. I would have accepted any number. If you got that number wrong, I would have still given it to you. I guess if you said three views, I would have questioned it.
JARROD: But, as we’ve just discovered, three’s not a real number.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Yeah, okay. Anyway, so counting our bonus question about Susan Sarandon and the question about The Countess who’s his cousin and Countess von Backwards. That’s 15, 15 wonderful questions. (in echo sounding voice) Ah, ah, ah.
[Thunderclap sound effect]
[Clip from The Count Counts]
CHORUS: Radio 1-2-3.
COUNT
VON
COUNT: And now, you will listen to a word from our sponsor.
GUY
SMILEY: Friends, has your counting been a little dull lately? Not much fun, hmm? Well, maybe it’s because you can only count to 10. So, let me tell you about the wonderful number 15, it’s just five more than 10. It keeps 14 from crashing into 16 and it’s real easy to count to.
[Clip ends]
BECCA: (in normal sounding voice) Now, Halloween might be a holiday about ghosts and monsters, but it’s also about trick or treating and that means dressing up. That’s why we’re going to play a game that I’m calling (in echo sounding voice) All Dressed Up!
[Clip from Sesame Street]
[music begins]
BERT: (singing) I’m all dressed up and ready to.
[Clip ends]
BECCA: (in normal voice) In this game, I’ll be asking questions related to Muppets and celebrities in costumes. That’s right. It’s still just a regular trivia game, but now it’s about costumes. Anyway, can you see through these costumes and see the truth? Each of these questions is worth two points. Please wait to buzz in until you’ve heard the full question.
Here we go.
[Clip from Sesame Street]
MURRAY
IMPOSTOR: Keep listening for the word impostor, today on Sesame Street.
MURRAY
MONSTER: Hey! You’re an impostor!
MURRAY
IMPOSTOR: That’s the word on the street! [nervous noise]
[Clip ends]
BECCA: Question one. Which named Muppet Show character appears dressed as a mummy in the opening number of the Gladys Knight episode of The Muppet Show.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Is it Fozzie?
BECCA: It is not Fozzie. Good guess though. There’s two whatnots. That’s why I specified named Muppet character. Mike, do you have a guess?
MIKE: I’m gonna guess Gonzo.
BECCA: It is Gonzo.
MIKE: Oh!
JARROD: Well done.
BECCA: This was one of my favorite episodes as a child because I had a lot of season five taped directly from TV. My dad had taped them. And yeah, Gonzo is a mummy and it’s funny because when he turns his head it’s the same joke as Dearth Nadir when he turns his head it’s revealed that he’s Gonzo.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question two. In a classic Sesame sketch about Ernie’s disguise kit, what two costumes does Ernie wear?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: I remember one being a pirate.
BECCA: One is a pirate.
MIKE: Is the other one a wizard?
BECCA: It is not a wizard. Good guess. Jarrod, do you know the other one? Mike. I’ll give you one point.
JARROD: Is it Little Red Riding Hood?
BECCA: It is Little Red Riding Hood.
MIKE: Oh, yes! The beard threw me off because he still had the beard on. [laughs]
BECCA: Yeah. He still has the beard as Little Red Riding Hood. Yes. What a great sketch. Of course, there was a book, Ernie’s Disguise Kit, that was the same thing. I had that as a kid. Question three in Muppets Most Wanted, this actor dresses as Fozzie Bear during the gulag’s talent show.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That is Danny Trejo.
BECCA: Danny Trejo. Another great friend of the Muppets, Danny Trejo. Question four. Similarly, in The Muppets 2011, this celebrity dresses as Animal while serving as the Moopets’ drummer Animool.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That would be Dave Grohl.
BECCA: Dave Grohl. Another great friend of the Muppets. It’s just Friend of the Muppets episode.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question five. This Koozebanian creature is capable of disguising itself as anything, including Kermit the Frog.
[Clock ticking sound]
JARROD: I got nothing.
BECCA: Mike, do you remember? One of those Koozebane sketches.
MIKE: The one that pops into the mind was from The Muppets Valentine Show. I do not know any other Koozebanian species by name.
BECCA: It is, of course, the Koozebanian Phoob.
MIKE: Oh, of course.
BECCA: Yeah, geez. How could you not know it was the Koozebanian Phoob?
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Question six. While directing his film The Summer of Snuffy, this director was forced to play the role of Mr. Snuffleupagus.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: I just for some reason have in my head: Bob.
BECCA: It is not Bob.
JARROD: But I’d like to have seen Bob dressed as Snuffy.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Yeah, no, I mean, listen, there were so many, I know, was it Shane who did a piece on all of Bob’s costumes?
JARROD: Yeah. Yeah.
BECCA: I think it was. Yeah, there’s so many good ones. What a legend.
BECCA: Mike, do you have a guess who directed The Summer of Snuffy and was forced to play Snuffy?
MIKE: [sighs] Drawing a blank.
BECCA: Okay, well, it was, of course, the real world director of the film, The Summer of Sam, Spike Lee.
MIKE: That’s who it was.
JARROD: (laughing) Okay.
BECCA: He wanted Snuffy to read his lines in different emotions and Snuffy was unable, so Spike Lee decided he would play Snuffy in the movie. Jarrod, more or less scary than regular Snuffy?
JARROD: Not quite as scary. Scary in a different way I think.
MIKE: Yeah.
BECCA: Yeah, I mean, certainly smaller. Spike.
JARROD: Yeah, for sure.
BECCA: I’ve seen Snuffy in real life. I’ve never seen Spike Lee in real life. Question seven. In the special “A Magical Halloween Adventure,” Telly Monster dresses up as this triangular object.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Piece of cheese.
BECCA: A piece of cheese. He is specifically Super Cheese.
MIKE: (laughing) Oh, yes.
BECCA: That special is very weird. There is a great early ToughPigs article where Danny Horn reviewed it from 2004. And Danny reveals that he does not understand Telly Monster.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: He is incredibly annoyed by the fact that Telly Monster loves things that are triangles. Question eight. In the same episode of the Muppet Babies reboot that introduced baby Sweetums, Statler and Waldorf appear as monsters to teach Rizzo a lesson about sharing. What type of monsters are they?
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: I should clarify, not technically the same episode, in the sense that they’re 2 11-minute episodes. But these were the two 11-minute episodes that were glued together.
JARROD: Mmhmm.
BECCA: I just don’t want, you know I don’t know, I’m sure there’s some Muppet Babies 2018 super fan who’s gonna get mad at me if I don’t specify that.
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: I’m just gonna take a stab in the dark and I’m going to say… Can I ask one question? And you can say whatever you like?
BECCA: Sure.
JARROD: Is it, are they the same or are they two separate things.
BECCA: They are both the same kind of monster.
JARROD: Okay. Are they werewolves?
BECCA: They are not werewolves. Good guess. Mike, you want to just guess a monster?
MIKE: Well, that was gonna be my guess. Are they vampires?
BECCA: No, I’m sorry. They are mummies.
MIKE: Mummies.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: They imagine that like Rizzo is looking for treasure in a pyramid. Or something.
MIKE: Oh.
BECCA: Yeah, I saw this episode just, I don’t remember it. Anyway, even without wearing an additional costume, this Muppet Show monster has represented both Quasimodo and Frankenstein’s monster.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: I’m gonna guess Sweetums.
BECCA: It is not Sweetums. Good guess. Jarrod, do you want to try to steal?
JARROD: Yeah, but I’ve forgotten his name.
BECCA: [laughs] You must know it if you forgot his name.
JARROD: Yeah. It’s um, is it… is it… Van Neuter’s mate?
BECCA: It is Van Neuter’s mate. And he is of course named…?
JARROD: Uuuh.
BECCA: I’m just gonna give it to you anyway, in the spirit of…
JARROD: Yes.
BECCA: … spirit of a season.
JARROD: I’ve forgotten the name. It’s uh, it’s, it’s…Oh! Hang on. Sorry. I’ve just got the “Eggy Noggy” skit stuck in my head.
BECCA: Yup.
JARROD: And I’m trying to remember the name. Mulch. Mulch.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: It is Mulch. Mulch is his name. Yeah, he does appear season 5 of The Muppet Show as Quasimodo. And then in Muppets Go Hollywood or Muppets Go to the Movies, one of them, he’s Frankenstein. And then after that he’s Van Neuter’s assistant.
Okay. So now we’re going to take a slight detour to talk a little bit about the video game Muppet Monster Adventure. In that game, there are monsterized versions of some of the main Muppets. In these two-part questions, I’m going to name a Muppet. Buzz-in and tell me which of the universal monsters they are in that game. You will also get two extra points, if you know, their monster name from the game.
Okay, our first one of these, Kermit.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: He’s Frankenstein’s Monster and I believe that he’s just called The Ker-monster.
BECCA: Correct on both counts. Okay. Next question. Miss Piggy.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike, again by a hair. By a millisecond.
MIKE: [laughs] She’s the Bride of Frankenstein and I believe her name is, she’s the Ghoulfriend.
BECCA: She is the Ghoulfriend. Mike, you are doing great at this PlayStation one-themed…
JARROD: Also a great game, by the way.
BECCA: Yeah no, it’s fun. I played it recently. And by recently, I mean like six years ago, seven years ago.
MIKE: That’s recently for PlayStation 1.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: I was about to say considering this game came out in like, yeah. Okay, next question. Gonzo.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: He’s a vampire. A dracula.
BECCA: He is a vampire. Yeah.
JARROD: Um, and… but you know what? I couldn’t tell you the name. So Mike, if you want to steal, go for it.
BECCA: This is the best pun in the entire game.
MIKE: It is. [laughs] Nose-feratu.
JARROD: Nose-feratu. Damn it.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: It is Nose-feratu.
JARROD: I should’ve just spent another four seconds.
MIKE: Once you said vampire, it came up. It’s just like, “Oh that’s it.”
BECCA: No. It’s the best joke in the game. None of the other ones they tried even half as hard. Like, you know.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: I bet Kirk [Thatcher] came up with these and, you know.
MIKE: Yeah.
BECCA: Anyway, next question. Fozzie Bear.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That is… he is a werewolf.
BECCA: Mmhmm.
JARROD: And he’s the Wocka Wocka Werebear.
BECCA: Yep. Again, doesn’t feel like maybe tried as hard as Nose-feratu.
JARROD: No.
BECCA: And then last and definitely least, Clifford.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: He is the swamp monster.
BECCA: Yeah, Crea–
JARROD: And is called… yeah, yeah. And it’s Muck Monster, I believe.
BECCA: It is the Muck Monster, which is not even a pun. I don’t get that one. I don’t know what they were, what they were trying for.
JARROD: Because swamp is mucky, I guess?
BECCA: Well, no, I mean, I know that. But I mean like…
JARROD: Yeah, there’s no pun to it. It’s no Nose-feratu, is it?
BECCA: Yeah. [laughs] Well, now I know what I’m dressing up as for Halloween. The Muck Monster.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: No, it’s not the Muck Monster. I already promised Scott, from Muppet Wiki, that I’m gonna dress as Meteora.
MIKE: Yes.
[Jarrod laughs]
BECCA: [laughs] So here’s something scary, this episode we are not playing (in echo sounding voice) Beat the Time. (in normal voice) Instead, we are doing something else. We’re going to play a new version of an old favorite game, (in echo sounding voice) Order Up.
[Clip from Sesame Street plays]
GROVER: Yessir. A rushed order on the special there, Charlie.
[Clip ends]
BECCA: Sorry, Grover. (in echo sounding voice) Order Up (in normal voice) isn’t a game about being a waiter. Instead, it’s a game about placing things in chronological order.
I’m going to give you two scary moments in Muppet history. Your job is to buzz in and tell me which came first. So if I said, Uncle Deadly appears on The Muppet Show or the Count appears on Sesame Street, you’d buzz in and say, The Count appears on Sesame Street.
That’s it. That’s the game. Each of these questions is worth two points. And of course you can’t steal if your opponent gets it wrong because there’s only two possible options. All right, you get it?
MIKE: Got it.
JARROD: Got it.
BECCA: Okay, let’s see which came first. Question one. The Alice Cooper episode of The Muppet Show or the Vincent Price episode of The Muppet Show.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: That would be Vincent Price.
BECCA: It is Vincent Price. Vincent Price, 1976. Alice Cooper, 1978. I don’t expect you to know that. I just wrote these down. Question two. Grover or Herry Monster.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Grover.
BECCA: It is Grover, technically, because he appeared in 1967 as Gleep. Whereas Herry Monster did not appear until the first episode of season two of Sesame Street.
Question, three. Sweetums or Thog.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Sweetums.
BECCA: I’m sorry. It is not Sweetums. Great Santa Claus Switch with Thog is 1970. The Frog Prince with Sweetums is 1971.
MIKE: I got the release date confused with Hey Cinderella! That’s what happened.
BECCA: That’ll do it. That’s Splurge. That’s Splurge.
MIKE: [laughs] That is Splurge. Yeah.
BECCA: Question four. The “Soldier and Death” episode of The Storyteller or the Fraggle Rock episode “Scared Silly.”
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod, by a second.
JARROD: Fraggle Rock.
BECCA: It is the Fraggle Rock episode. 1985 for Fraggle Rock. 1989 for “Soldier and Death.” That was part of the Jim Henson Hour. Question five. Ernie and Bert explore a pyramid and find a talking statue or the song “Monster in the Mirror.”
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Ernie and Bert explore that pyramid.
BECCA: It is. That was 1982. “Monster in the Mirror” not until 1989, which feels late to me.
MIKE: I thought it was later than that actually.
BECCA: Yeah.
JARROD: Yeah, I would’ve actually gone later. I thought that was post-Jim.
BECCA: No. I mean, it was, it was right on the cusp. I think the celebrity version may have been recorded post-Jim.
JARROD: Yeah.
MIKE: Oh, that’s why.
JARROD: I equate it with the Simpsons at the end.
MIKE: That’s– Yep.
BECCA: That’ll do it. That’ll do it.
MIKE: Yeah.
BECCA: But technically it existed before the Simpsons at the end.
MIKE: Yeah.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA:Yeah. It’s just one of those things where again, like, and Jarrod you’re of a similar age to me if I recall. But like, because I was born in ‘91, that just feels like it’s always been Grover’s song.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: And it’s kind of funny to think that he was around for like 20-some odd years.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: Without that. Like it’s just weird.
[Mike laughs]
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: Question six. Elmo Says Boo or Muppet Monster Adventure for the Sony PlayStation.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Elmo Says Boo.
BECCA: It is Elmo Says Boo. 1997 for Elmo Says Boo. Muppet Monster Adventure wasn’t until 2000. Question seven. The song “I Want a Monster To Be My Friend” is removed from Sesame Street due to controversy or Elmo first appears on Sesame Street.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Elmo appears on Sesame Street.
BECCA: It is Elmo appears on Sesame Street. Elmo’s first appearance is in the song “We Are All Monsters,” which of course is redubbed for Elmo Says Boo and other purposes. That was 1980. “I Want a Monster” stuck around from like season two of Sesame Street through 1984 before parents complained. And then it was only gone for a little bit before it came back with different lyrics for Elmopalooza.
I have to say that Elmopalooza version of “I Want a Monster To Be My Friend” is very creepy.
JARROD: I don’t think I’ve seen it. Yeah.
BECCA: Yeah. I mean, I love Elmopalooza. In that En Vogue is basically like hitting on Cookie Monster and Frazzle and like, it’s weird. It’s just weird.
JARROD: Oh, I guess we’re getting Elmopalooza is getting canceled.
BECCA: Yeah, no I’m canceling Elmopalooza. Question eight. The Cube or The Monster at the End of This Book?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: The Cube.
BECCA: It is The Cube. The Cube is 1969. Same year as the first year of Sesame Street. Monster at the End of This Book, though 1971. Pretty early in Sesame’s run.
Question nine. Matt Vogel begins performing Uncle Deadly or Matt Vogel begins performing the Count.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Matt Vogel begins performing the Count.
BECCA: I’m sorry. It is actually Uncle Deadly. He doesn’t start performing the Count until that video we talked about earlier which was 2013.
JARROD: Mmhmm.
BECCA: So Uncle Deadly, of course, he was playing in The Muppets 2011.
And question 10. The Sesame Street special: A Magical Halloween Adventure or The Bear in the Big Blue House episode “Halloween Bear.”
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod, do you have a guess?
JARROD: I’m gonna go Bear in the Big Blue House, but I don’t like it.
BECCA: Oh, you should love Bear in the Big Blue House. That’s a great show.
[All laugh]
JARROD: I don’t like the answer.
BECCA: No, listen, Jarrod. You are right. Trusting your gut paid off. The “Halloween Bear” was 1999. Magical Halloween Adventure, which I think I spoiled earlier, was 2004 because I said that that’s when the ToughPigs’ article was from. Messed that up. But yeah, I mean, hey, you are right. “Halloween Bear” is older.
BECCA: All right, let me just total the score. This is actually a very close game, which is exciting. I like close games.
JARROD: I’m just doing a hell of a lot better than I did in the last one.
BECCA: Yeah, well, the last one…
JARROD I think I’d got like two answers on the last one.
BECCA: I put you on a final episode where I pull out like the most nonsense trivia possible. That was the one where I was asking questions about like Gulliver’s Travels.
[Mike laughs]
JARROD: yeah.
BECCA: Where it was like, no, no one’s gonna do…Like, you need to be Ryan to do even okay at that.
JARROD: And I was against Ryan.
BECCA: Yes, you were. And this one, I feel like is more your speed. I’m asking about specials you’ve seen and like…
JARROD: Yeah.
MIKE: I’m as shocked as you are. I’m thinking, welcome to the podcast feed. Your first opponent is the co-owner of the website.
JARROD: Yeah. You’d be surprised how little I’ve seen.
BECCA: Certainly certainly. Yeah, no. I mean like Jarrod, you are knowledgeable, but you are not like a Shane. Or a Ryan, where I know that you’re gonna pull out the most random facts.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: Anyway, so our score right now: Mike, you have 52 points and Jarrod, you have 58 points.
JARROD: Oooh, alright.
BECCA: So it is close.
JARROD: Anyone’s game.
BECCA: Yeah, and it’s time for our final trivia game. Kind of. As we mentioned earlier, in 1997 there was a made-for-VHS Sesame Special called Elmo Says Boo. It’s terrible. I love it.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Anthony Strand from ToughPigs loves it. Did I mention that it was terrible?
Anyway, in this special, Elmo goes to the Count’s castle to tell him some funny, scary jokes. The special has some old Sesame clips and I guess it kind of has a plot that’s about telling jokes, but it’s mostly Elmo and also weirdly Rosita and Telly and Baby Bear and Kingston Livingston the third and Joey and Davey Monkey telling basically the worst jokes anyone has ever heard. Here’s an example of one of those jokes.
[Clip from Elmo Says Boo]
[Crickets chirping]
[Door knocks 3 times]
[Owl hoot]
COUNT
VON
COUNT: Yes.
ELMO: Knock Knock.
COUNT
VON
COUNT: Who’s there?
ELMO: Bat.
COUNT
VON
COUNT: Bat who?
ELMO: Batter open the door Mr. Count. Elmo has some funny jokes to tell you. [laughs]
[Clip ends]
JARROD: [laughs] No thanks.
BECCA: [laughs] This is why we are going to play a game that I am calling (in echo sounding voice) Time to Spookalize.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: (in normal voice) In this game, I will tell you an actual joke from the 1997 special Elmo Says Boo. Your job is to buzz in and give me the punchline. I’ll give you some wiggle room if you don’t get the wording exactly, but you’ve got to get close. We take our funny scary joke seriously here.
Each of these is going to be worth two points. And again, these are all real jokes from the special. I will say if we get to a knock knock joke, I will do all of the setup myself up until what would be the punchline. You guys understand how knock knock jokes work. You are not three and a half years old like Elmo.
All right. Here are some jokes. Question one. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike, you buzzed in.
MIKE: Is it ice scream?
BECCA: You might think. You might think that the answer is ice scream. But I’m sorry. That is not funny and scary enough. Jarrod, do you want to guess what a ghost’s favorite dessert is?
JARROD: I’ve got nothing. Umm…I think it’s one of those anti-jokes, you know, the jokes that just don’t have a funny answer. Jell-O.
[Becca and Mike laugh]
BECCA: Listen, that’s funnier than any of the jokes in Elmo Says Boo.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: No, the correct answer is, of course, booberry pie.
MIKE: Oh, of course.
JARROD: Of course.
BECCA: Okay, next question. Where does a bat go to get clean?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: To the bat-room.
BECCA: You know, normally I’d say that’s close enough, but I’m taking these jokes pretty seriously.
JARROD: Oh, that’s fair. That’s fair.
BECCA: Close but no cigar. Mike?
MIKE: The bat-tub?
BECCA: Yeah, the bat-tub. Absolutely.
JARROD: Yeah. Well done.
BECCA: Okay. Question three. What’s a ghost’s favorite game?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
BECCA: Like hide and seek, because they’re invisible, or whatever.
BECCA: Close.
JARROD: Close. Oh, god damn it.
BECCA: Mike, do you want to steal?
MIKE: [laughs] Is it hide and shriek?
BECCA: (laughing) It is hide and shriek.
JARROD: Aww. I’m just so sad.
BECCA: Question five. Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who.
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Do you need a tissue? Like, cause you’re crying or something?
BECCA: I will give that one to you.
MIKE: Give it to him.
BECCA: I will give that one to you. It’s phrased as, “Please don’t cry. It’s only a joke.”
JARROD: Yeah. Yeah.
BECCA: That is certainly close enough that I will give it to you. What’s the scariest ride at the amusement park?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: The roller ghoster.
BECCA: The roller ghoster is correct.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Question seven. And I do want to say, I should have written down who tells each of these jokes. But this one I know for a fact is from Joey and Davey Monkey because it is what did the ghost give the monkeys to eat?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Boonanas?
BECCA: It is boonanas.
JARROD: Awful.
BECCA: I’ve definitely talked about them on this podcast before and I think possibly on Mike’s podcast, but Joey and Davey Monkey were characters on Sesame Street when I was a child who only existed to say “bananas” in a funny voice. They did not have any other gimmick or really any other thing, other than just they said bananas in a funny voice.
JARROD: Funny voice. I’m assuming I can guess the voice that Joey had.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Yeah. I think you probably could guess the voice that Joey monkey had. Yeah. And I will say Davey Monkey sounded like David Rudman doing an impression of Joey Mazzarino.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Question eight. What’s the scariest thing you can have for lunch?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Jell-O.
[Becca and Mike laugh]
BECCA: Listen, as someone who has been hospitalized for extended periods of time, it is terrifying when all you can eat for lunch is Jell-O. But no, it is not Jell-O. Mike, do you want to steal?
MIKE: Is it a sand-witch?
BECCA: It is a sand-witch. Question 9. What bat knows its ABCs?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: An alpha-bat.
BECCA: It is an alpha-bat. [sighs] (laughing) I can’t stop laughing.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: (in normal voice) Question 10. What does the Count say at the beginning of a baseball game?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: I remember this one. Bat-ter up.
BECCA: It is bat-ter up. See, Jarrod baseball is a game that we have here in the United States.
JARROD: Gotcha, right. Yeah, yeah.
BECCA: Yeah and the batter is the person who hits the ball. They don’t use the animal bat though.
JARROD: Oh I thought that’s how Covid started.
[Becca and Mike laugh]
BECCA: These are the jokes, folks. Question 11. Which bat works for the circus?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike, by a second again. Mike’s on a roll with these bad… See, here’s the difference. Mike is a dad, so Mike understands dad jokes.
MIKE: Yeah, that’s it.
JARROD: Yup.
BECCA: On a deeper level than Jarrod does.
MIKE: [laughs] Is it an acro-bat?
JARROD: Yeah. Yup.
BECCA: It is an acro-bat. Question 12. What’s the first thing ghosts do when they ride in a car?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: You know, I can’t even think of it. I just thought put on their seat belts.
BECCA: Make it into a joke.
JARROD: Okay. All right you both looking at me like go go. All right. Put on their…
BECCA: You’re close.
JARROD: Put on their (in spooky wavering voice) Seeeeeaaaat beeeeelts.
[Mike and Becca laugh]
BECCA: No.
JARROD: Nope. I give up. Mike?
BECCA: But you know what? Funnier than the actual joke.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Mike?
MIKE: They put on their sheet belt.
BECCA: They do put on their sheet belt.
JARROD: Aww. Never would have gotten that.
BECCA: Question eight. What does a ghost put in his ice cream soda?
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: You might say, “Wait a minute, Becca it feels like there’s already a pun in this and shouldn’t the answer be ice scream?” No.
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Mike.
MIKE: Is it whipped scream?
BECCA: It is whipped scream. Which again, feels like a cheap cop out.
JARROD: My answer was going to be boooooot beer.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Here’s the thing, Jarrod’s are all funnier. [laughs]
MIKE: They are.
BECCA: And then our 13th scary joke. What is a baby ghost’s favorite game?
[Clock ticking sound]
[Buzz in ding]
BECCA: Jarrod.
JARROD: Is it peek-a-BOO?
BECCA: It is peek-a-boo. And with all those jokes, you must have worked up quite an appetite. So go into the kitchen for some screech cobbler. That’s the last joke in the special. That’s how it ends.
[Mike and Becca laugh]
BECCA: So we still have two quick games to go. First up is, of course, (echo sounding voice) The Anything in the World Prize Game. (in normal voice) Because you two are now able to ask me anything in the world, or at least anything in the world of spooky Muppet stuff and Muppet monsters.
Each of you will get to ask me a question about the Muppets. If you stump me you will earn 15 points. Now, let me just do a quick point total to see where we’re at while you think this over. Hey, it is still a very close game. Although Mike did pull ahead in that joke round.
JARROD: Well done.
BECCA: Jarrod, you have 64 points. Mike, you have 70 points. So again still very close but yeah. No, no. Jarrod kept over-thinking those jokes. Anyway. Jarrod, do you want to ask me your stump-the-host question first?
JARROD: I do. In the Vincent Price episode of The Muppet Show the monster Thudge McGerk shows up in Statler and Waldorf’s balcony. According to them, Thudge is a scary actor in the same vein as Vincent Price. What was Thudge McGerk’s last film?
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: I don’t remember. I remember Thudge McGerk. I don’t remember. The Fly.
[Clock Ticking stops]
JARROD: It was The Phantom of the Soap Opera.
BECCA: That’s right.
BECCA: That’s a joke. And Jarrod, you get 15 points, bringing you up to 79. Mike?
MIKE: There was a Sesame Street storybook from 1986 called Scared of the Dark, where Bert and Ernie go to a scary movie. Can you name the scary movie they go to?
[Clock ticking sound]
BECCA: I can s–. I know that it’s not– I mean, clearly, it’s like a very stupid title. It’s not like an actual scary movie.
MIKE: [laughs] No.
[Clock ticking stops]
BECCA: It’s something like Attack of the Broccoli. Iffy, I know you’re listening. I’m sorry I don’t remember this Bert and Ernie story. I’m sorry, Iffy. What is it, Mike?
MIKE: It’s called Ghosties.
BECCA: You know that feels like it could be a horror movie from the 80s.
MIKE: Yeah, you know, there might be a movie called Ghosties.
BECCA: Not that far from Ghoulies, you know. I do have to say, today my Amazon Stick recommended that I watch Ouija Shark, a movie about a ghost shark.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: Who is summoned by a piece of driftwood that has a Ouija board on it. And folks, I’m sure I will have watched Ouija Shark by the time this episode reaches your ears.
[Jarrod laughs]
MIKE: [laughs] I want to go watch Ouija Shark now.
BECCA: Anyway, Mike, you also get 15 points for that, meaning that it is still a very close game. Still with a difference of six points. Jarrod at 79 points and Mike with 85 points. And that brings us to our final round. It’s time for our final high-stakes competition (in echo sounding voice) Say the Word
(in normal voice) In this round, you can wager any amount of points. The winner gets the points. The loser loses them. Unlike on Final Jeopardy, you will hear the question before you wager. Again, Jarrod, you have 79 points. Mike, you have 85 points.
All right, now here’s your scary question. One of the earliest Count von Count songs was “The Transylvania Polka.” In this spooky number, The Count begins with a mostly spoken introduction, explaining that his song is the favorite of all sorts of monsters, even Dr. Frankenstein. He finishes the introduction by telling an actual famous singer to “eat his heart out.” What famous singer, also of Central European descent, does the Count taunt before singing “The Transylvania Polka?”
[Clock ticking sound]
JARROD: Awww. This was on Silly Songs and I’ve heard it a billion times.
BECCA: Well, this is the thing and this is something that like I was listening to. It’s on the Elmo Says Boo record, I believe. Or record I say, as if they released that on vinyl. On the Elmo Says Boo CD and I was listening to it and I’m like, “What did he just say?”
JARROD: Oh. I don’t know. I’m gonna be so upset when I hear this.
BECCA: The Count’s from Romania, right? Which is part of Central Europe and this singer, while not born in Central Europe, comes from Central European descent.
Now, Jarrod, you’ve definitely heard this song Mike. You’ve heard this song, right?
MIKE: I’ve heard this song.
BECCA: Okay. I was gonna say this is, this is one of the ones that was like on the 70s records and stuff.
MIKE: I don’t even know if I have this person’s name right. But here we go.
[Clock ticking stops]
BECCA: So, I will say both of you made very conservative bets, almost like this is something that weirdly isn’t even on Muppet Wiki. Someone needs to get on that. And that someone should be me, but I refuse to learn how to edit Muppet Wiki. That’s got to change. Both of you made a very conservative bet. Also, well, let’s see if either of you are right. Jarrod, you bet one single point.
JARROD: Yeah, and I’m pretty sure I should have bet all of them because I’m pretty sure this answer is correct.
BECCA: Yeah, who’d you bet?
JARROD: Keith Urban.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Yeah. Keith Urban. Yeah. Hometown boy done good for you, Jarrod. Huh?
JARROD: Yeah. Yeah.
BECCA: It is not Keith Urban.
JARROD: What?!
BECCA: Who is of course from Australia. Not, not… I don’t know. Is he of Central European descent though? Who knows?
JARROD: Urban feels like a Romanian name.
BECCA: Yes, sure, exactly. It is not Keith Urban. So however, you only lose one point. Mike, you bet five points. Mike, who did you guess?
MIKE: I guessed Frankie Yankovic and I don’t even know if he sang anything or just played the accordion.
BECCA: I don’t know enough about Frankie Yankovic or if he’s from… Where he’s from but that is also not correct.
MIKE: Womp womp.
BECCA: You also lose your points. Lose five points. The correct answer: “Eat your heart out, Bobby Vinton.”
[Clip from “Transylvania Polka”]
COUNT
VON
COUNT: Bobby Winton. Eat your heart out.
[Clip ends]
BECCA: Of course, popularly known as the Polish Prince. Weirdly enough Bobby Vinton, still alive.
MIKE: Really?
BECCA: Yeah.
JARROD: And goes by the name Keith Urban.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: And he goes by the name Keith Urban. No.
JARROD: Exactly.
MIKE: Looks fantastic.
JARROD: Yeah.
BECCA: So again, what a close game, a difference of literally two points coming down to that, “Transylvania Polka.” 78 points, Jarrod. 80 points, Mike. So Mike wins by two. That is, I think, the closest we’ve ever had a game on this show.
So I do want to thank you, thank you both. So our winner and today’s Toughest Pig is Mike Westfall.
MIKE: Yay!
BECCA: Mike, congratulations. You win either your choice of some screech cobbler. Or this tiny tiny portrait I made of…it’s shiny. I’m sorry. It’s in a sleeve.
MIKE: Oh, I can see it.
BECCA: This tiny tiny, tiny, tiny portrait I made of Count von Count.
MIKE: I love it. I will take the portrait because I am allergic to screeches.
[All laugh]
BECCA: Aren’t we all? Yeah, and listen, I do have to say selfishly and I know Jarrod is my boss but I’m glad I don’t need to navigate the international post system to get this to Jarrod.
JARROD: Well done. Yeah. So that’s the spookiest thing of all.
BECCA: I already need to send a wedding invitation to a friend of mine in Canada, and I have been putting that off.
MIKE: That’s hard enough.
BECCA: [laughs] That’s far enough. Exactly.
MIKE: It’s hard enough but yeah, I guess that too.
BECCA: And that brings us to the end of another one so guests, where can people find you if you wish to be found? Let’s start with Jarrod. Jarrod, where can we find you if you wish to be found?
JARROD: You can find me on Toughpigs.com. And you can find me on Twitter which is @jazzfairclough. But you’ll find me. Just type in my name. I’ll pop up somewhere.
BECCA: I’m sure I’ve tagged you in this post.
JARROD: Oh for sure.
BECCA: Yeah. And I should, you know, To Introduce Our Guest Star, there’s some great episodes of that that are still available. And you should definitely check it out. And by you, I don’t mean Jarrod. You know what, Jarrod? You should check it out. I don’t know if you’ve listened.
JARROD: I’m not a fan of the American host in it.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: Oh yeah. No. What’s his name? What’s his name?
JARROD: Uh Jell-O.
BECCA: Jell-O. Yeah. Davey and Joey Monkey, I believe is their name. And Mike, where can we find you if you wish to be found?
MIKE: Sure. You can find me personally via linktree.com/Mikewestfall. That’s “west” like where the Wicked Witch is from and “fall” like what her broom does when she tries to fly it with no hands.
BECCA: Oh, very spooky.
MIKE: And I also have a podcast about TV holiday specials called The Advent Calendar House. It is located conveniently at adventcalendar.house.
BECCA: And like we said, you know, Anthony Strand and I were on an episode talking about Elmo Saves Christmas. And then Anthony came back to talk about the Flintstones’ Christmas Carol, which I have to say, sounds like it was much better than I always imagined it being whenever he mentioned it during a full season of Movin’ Right Along.
[Mike laughs]
BECCA: And you’ve done other Muppet specials on there as well. And I’m definitely going to keep nagging you until I’m on for another Muppet special this holiday.
MIKE: Oh, I’d love to have, I’d love to have both of you.
JARROD: I’ll be there.
BECCA: Yeah, no, it’s great. It’s a good show. It’s fun.
MIKE: Thank you.
BECCA: And of course, you can find me at Toughpigs.com. The only website that isn’t caving in on itself right now. I’m on ToughPigs.
JARROD: Yet.
BECCA: Yeah, no listen, listen. I say this every episode. We survived 23 years– 22 years. We survived 22 years. That’s longer than Twitter. Longer than Instagram. We can keep going.
You can also find ToughPigs on the ToughPigs Twitter, the ToughPigs Facebook, the ToughPigs Instagram. When I stop being lazy, maybe I’ll get a ToughPigs Tumblr going again.
But anyway, and if you like the work we do at ToughPigs, consider donating to the ToughPigs patreon, where you could get even more exclusive free stuff. We also have ToughPigs t-shirts, which include a (in echo sounding voice) Hubba-Wha?! (in normal voice) t-shirt and a shirt I designed inspired by Monster at the End of This Book and some pride stuff still and a bunch of cool things. Muppets Take Manhattan themed shirts. I got another one that should be up soon. Probably is up by the time this episode is posted. We’ll get there. So check them out on our ToughPigs teepublic page.
And if you want to find me directly, not on ToughPigs, I’m on Twitter @Unclepetunio. Again that’s uncle like the kind of Fraggle that would be a brave explorer and then petunio is like the flower but with an o instead of an a. And I’m on all of the non-Twitter social media platforms @tallgirlpetunia. That time I spelled the flower correctly.
Sure. I mean look, find me, who knows what social media site is going to be good by the time this is out. We could all be Zlormf: the social media site where we zlormf each other.
Anyway, [sighs] Well, I’d like to thank some other people for helping out. Of course, our guests. Thank you both. This was lovely. And Jarrod again, thank you for getting up early for us.
JARROD: You’re welcome.
BECCA: On this cold wintery day. And also thank you to Staci Rosen for writing the theme music to our show. Thanks to Richard Gomez for doing our host artwork. Thank you to Joe Hennes, the ToughPigs Muppet fan podcast executive producer. Thanks to me for writing and hosting, and producing and editing, and all that. And thanks to Elmo for all those funny scary jokes.
[Mike and Jarrod laugh]
BECCA: And lastly, thanks to all of you at home for being with us on (in echo sounding voice) Hubba-Wha?!: (in normal voice) the Muppet quiz show.
And as always, Bobby Vinton, eat your heart out.
[Jarrod and Mike laugh]
BECCA: Good night, everyone.
[End of Hubba-Wha?! theme plays]
[Theme ends]
[Clip from The Muppet Show plays]
[Music plays]
[Musics ends]
HOUSE 1: My brother has ghosts in his attic.
HOUSE 2: Sounds scary.
HOUSE 1: Yeah, he’s on the 10 most haunted list.
[laughter]
[Music plays]
[Clip ends]
