I don’t remember the first time I saw Emmet Otter’s Jug-band Christmas. So I don’t remember how I felt at the end of the talent show sequence when the judges awarded the $50 prize to The Nightmare, the hard rock band composed of hooligans from Riverbottom. Was I expecting Ma Otter to win? Did I assume Emmet’s jug band would win because it’s right there in the title? Did I think it would end in a tie? I have no idea!
But every time I watch the special now, I’m forced to admit an uncomfortable truth: The Riverbottom Nightmare band deserved to win.
One thing that’s always struck me about the story is that The Nightmare wins the talent contest fairly. We know they’re scoundrels from the very first time we see them, so it would have been easy and believable to show them securing their win by cheating. They could have sabotaged the other acts, or threatened the audience, or bribed the judges (I betcha that awful Gretchen Fox would have accepted some payola). But they don’t do any of that. They just show up and ROCK THE HOUSE.
(Some of you dedicated Jug-heads might be thinking “Doesn’t Harrison Fox say The Nightmare is a late entry into the contest?” Yes, he does! But we don’t know how late they entered, or what the cutoff was, or whether there’s anything in the rules that say late entries are automatically disqualified. Much like the movie Air Bud taught us that dogs are allowed to play high school basketball because there’s no rule against it, Emmet Otter’s Jug-band Christmas teaches us that snakes and catfish are similarly allowed to compete in the Waterville talent contest on short notice.)
All the other acts we see are pretty laid back. George and Melissa Rabbit’s number is fine, but as dancers go, they’re no Mikhail Bunnyrishnikov. Yancy Woodchuck is a loveable goofball, but his rendition of “Barbeque” is a bit undercooked. And as for those squirrels frantically jumping around the stage — what exactly is their talent?
Of course, Ma Otter’s performance of “Our World” is lovely. It’s definitely one of the top five songs ever sung by an otter. And the Frogtown Hollow Jubilee Jug Band sounds great singing “Brothers” — especially considering they rehearsed it one time just minutes before they took the stage! It would have been understandable if either of their acts had won.
But when The Nightmare does their thing? They blow the roof off the place! Just look at that production value. They use electric instruments! They bring their own lights! Chuck Stoat is wearing some truly amazing boots!
For the residents of this sleepy little town, the performance by those Riverbottom boys must have been mind-blowing! They’re like moviegoers in the 1920s seeing their first talkie, or folks at the 1939 World’s Fair seeing television for the first time, or Pizza Hut customers in 2002 trying their first P’Zone. It’s a completely earth-shattering experience.
In fact, I think it speaks well of the judges that they’re open-minded enough to give the award to The Nightmare. Pop culture (and real life!) are full of stories where old-fashioned small-town folks resist new kinds of art and music that they’re not familiar with. Based on the way The Nightmare is received, it’s safe to say that, if Footloose had taken place in Waterville, the town leaders never would have outlawed dancing.
Hey, what if Kevin Bacon had competed in the talent contest? He’d probably get the prize! Wouldn’t it be cool if Kevin Bacon won $50? Heck yeah, it would!
The Riverbottom band is also ahead of their time when it comes to songwriting. Their original composition “Riverbottom Nightmare Band” is all about themselves, with lines like “We got no respect for animal, birdie, or fish” and “We know we’re a mess/Our type does not like to stay clean.” This combination of candid confessional and cocky swagger would later become more common in hip-hop, but again, it would have been brand-new to the audience at that talent show.
Are the Riverbottom boys bullies? Yes. Are they rude, crude hoodlums? Yes. But are they talented? Yes! And that’s the #1 criterion for winning a talent show.
The creators of Emmet Otter made a bold decision allowing the Nightmare to secure the victory over the kind-hearted heroes of the story. But whether we like it or not, that’s just the way the world works sometimes. Fortunately, Emmet and his friends and his ma are eventually rewarded with a long-term gig at Doc Bullfrog’s Riverside Rest — which includes those all-you-can-eat mashed potatoes Wendell Porcupine gets so excited about.
With Christmas upon us, I hope all of you lovely Tough Pigs readers receive nice gifts and long-term gigs and mashed potatoes. Especially if you’re nicer than Chuck Stoat!
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by Ryan Roe – Ryan@ToughPigs.com
