Yesterday we shared the news that ‘Muppet Clue’, an adaptation of the famous detective game, was being released at some stage in the coming months. I’m super excited, because I’m a fan of both Kermit the Frog AND beating people with candlesticks! I’m also a mad board game fan. You know how all the cool kids in high school were at parties and kissing and stuff? I was sitting with my friends playing Trivial Pursuit. I was VERY cool. Where are those kids now, eh? Married with kids? Pfft, I’m single and still playing Trivial Pursuit, so, who’s to say who won?
Crisis of personality aside, I really do enjoy board games. This news got me thinking though, what other Muppet adaptations of board games could we have? Sure, we all know of Muppet Monopoly, or Muppet Chess, or Muppet Jumanji (banned in every country besides Mongolia). But let’s put on our Marketing helmets and slide into our Creativity cannon, and shoot off into an Ideas Shower like the long nose weirdos we are! (You’re welcome for the free suggestions, Disney Licensing…)
1 – TICKET TO RIDE – TRAVEL BY MAP EDITION
Ticket to Ride is one of my all time favorite games. It involves trains, colorful pieces, and a big old map of a country or continent I can use to point at and say ‘Been there’ even if I haven’t been there. You know who loves traveling? Muppets! They’ve traveled so much, they even made a movie about it! The Muppets have a fun way of traveling far distances in a hurry, though, and I’m not talking about a cool fast plane. I’m talking about ‘Traveling by Map’, something they do in the 2011 film. So, with a whole sequence dedicated to maps and travel, it makes total sense to slap a stock photo of Muppets around the train on the box, which you can see I’ve done poorly. You can even confuse your films further and put something about ‘Moving Right Along’ on the board!
2 – MUPPET LABS MOUSETRAP
Welcome to Muppet Labs, where mice are being trapped thanks to state of the art Rube Goldberg machines. That’s how you play that game, right? I’ll be honest, I haven’t played Mouse Trap since my niece was 4 and adorable, and she’s now 13 and mean to me. Still, imagine a version of the classic game where instead of a mouse, you’re testing the new machinery out on a little Beaker toy! Imagine setting off a banana sharpener, which in turns sets off a gorilla detector, which in turn sets off an electric sledgehammer! Which all culminates in poor little Beaky getting trapped underneath a cage, which can’t be removed due to the fact that it’s covered in the super glue* from the Gilda Radner episode.
*Super glue not included
3 – HUNGRY HUNGRY BIG MEAN CARLS
This just makes good sense.
4 – SCOOTS AND LADDERS
Pitched mainly as a pun, this is a take on the old classic, Chutes and Ladders (or Snakes and Ladders, but the pun doesn’t work there). You can play with little Scooter tokens and attempt to climb the rafters of The Muppet Theater, all the while trying to avoid falling down the various chutes Gonzo has put in there for his latest stunt – Snow Chute, which is where he tries snowboarding down a massive slide while singing ‘You Can Call Me Al’ by Paul Simon. Watch out too for Gaffer the Cat, who may cause Scooter to sneeze and lose his footing! (I have decided Scooter is allergic to cats, which pretty much makes sense when you think about it)
5 – STATLERS OF CATAN
You can thank Joe Hennes for that name. In this version of the classic board game (which I am dreadful at, by the way), instead of managing resources like wool, grain and lumber, players are tasked with holding and trading tomatoes, water bottles and soft rotting cheeses, all of which will be used to throw at Fozzie Bear at the end of his act. The winner of the most Victory Points (which is a thing I just learned about – I told you, I’m dreadful at this game) gets to pelt real life objects at their least funny friend, while they and another player laugh like this ‘Doh ho hehehehe’ and then maybe sing ‘We’re Marley and Marley’ if they’re feeling up to it?
By Jarrod Fairclough – Jarrod@ToughPigs.com
Click here to be mean to me like my niece on the ToughPigs Discord!
