Breaking News, Part Three

Published: April 3, 2003

Breaking News

Part 3: Aladdin’s lamp

Cast: Jim Henson (Kermit), Frank Oz (Aladdin), Jerry Nelson (Genie).

Kermit	Aw, it’s so dark in here, I can’t see a thing… where’s that camera cable around — whoop! [ CRASH! ] It’s right down there somewhere. Hey, could somebody turn on a light in here? Huh? Turn on some lights! [ They do. ] Oh. Ahem. Hi ho, this is Kermit the Frog, speaking to you for Sesame Street News — and tonight, I’m speaking to you from the home of Aladdin, the owner of that world famous magic lamp. And here he is now, hello, excuse me, Mr Aladdin.
Aladdin	Oh, hi, Frog! You can call me Al!
Kermit	Okay, Al — can you tell us, Al, you’re rubbing your magic lamp there, I see…
Aladdin	Yes!
Kermit	Yes. Why are you doing that?
Aladdin	Well, because it doesn’t work! Until you arrived, I was completely in the dark.
Kermit	Is that right.
Aladdin	Here. I’ll try rubbing it again.

	[ POOF! With a puff of smoke, the Genie appears. ]
Genie	Hey knock off with the rubbin’, will ya? I’m tryin’ to sleep in this lamp!
Kermit	Look at that, folks.
Aladdin	That’s the Genie. Genie — this is the frog. Frog, Genie. Genie, frog.
Kermit	Uh, yeah.
Aladdin	Frog, Genie.
Genie	How ya doin’, frog.
Kermit	Yeah, I recognize you by your light brown hair. [ chuckles ]
Aladdin	Ha, ha. Ha, ha.
Genie	Very funny.
Kermit	Uh, listen, Genies can do anything, why don’t you fix Aladdin’s lamp, here?
Genie	Hey, come on, I’m a Genie, not an electrician! What do I know from lamps?
Kermit	Oh. Uh, y’know, Aladdin, I think I got — I see one thing that’s wrong with your problem here.

Aladdin	Do you? What’s that, frog?
Kermit	Well, you see, your lamp doesn’t have a lightbulb.
Aladdin	Ohhhhh!
Kermit	See, that kinda lamp needs a lightbulb up there.
Aladdin	A lightbulb, up there! That’s a good idea! I’ll just go get a lightbulb!
Kermit	Okay.
Genie	Yeah, he needs a lightbulb, and I need another job. Ya ever try livin’ inside a lamp?
Kermit	Is that right? Pretty dark, huh?
Aladdin	Here’s a lightbulb! Here we go!
Kermit	Yeah, well, just screw it in the socket up there.
Aladdin	All right. I’ll do that. How’s that? Well?
Kermit	Okay, uh…
Aladdin	It still doesn’t work!
Kermit	Yeah, but —
Genie	To think I coulda worked for Ali Baba instead of this dingaling.
Aladdin	We’ll just wait here until it works.

Kermit	Well, Al… there’s another thing here. Al?
Aladdin	Mmm?
Kermit	See, the lamp has a plug. See? It has an electric plug there… and, yeah, it’s just sitting on the table…
Aladdin	This is a PLUG?
Kermit	Yeah.
Genie	It has ta be plugged in!
Kermit	It has to be plugged in to the outlet.
Aladdin	Plugged in?
Genie	Aw, brother…
Aladdin	Plugged in?
Kermit	You’ve got an electric outlet back there, you gotta plug it in.
Aladdin	Ah! All right. I’ll try this.
Kermit	Mm hmm.
Aladdin	Here goes!
Genie	Do you believe this dingaling?
Kermit	Well, not really, but, uh…
Aladdin	Okay! Lamp, do your stuff!
Kermit	Um… Al?
Aladdin	No, it still doesn’t work, frog!
Kermit	Al?
Genie	Brother…
Aladdin	Yes?
Kermit	Al…
Aladdin	I’ll just keep waiting…
Kermit	Well, Al, did you try turning on the switch?
Aladdin	The what?
Kermit	The switch — there’s an electric switch up there, on the lamp.
Aladdin	There is?
Kermit	Mm hmm.

Aladdin	Where — oh, you mean THIS switch over here!
Kermit	Yeah, see, right there? You gotta turn that on, and that makes the electricity go to the bulb.
Aladdin	Well, I’ll be. Sounds crazy to me, but I’ll try it! Here goes! [ He switches the lamp on. ] My lamp! It works! WOW!
Kermit	Isn’t that wonderful!
Aladdin	Wow! It sure is wonderful.
Genie	It is NOT wonderful! Not with me! You know I can’t sleep with the light on! Alaka-ZAM!

	[ With a puff of smoke, the Genie disappears. ]
Aladdin	Oh, my Genie is gone. But my lamp works! And you fixed it, frog!
Kermit	Okay, that’s wonderful. This is Kermit the Frog, returning you to your studios, okay?
Aladdin	Oh, don’t go yet…
Kermit	I’ll see ya around, Ali Baba.
Aladdin	You have to fix my magic toaster! And my magic hot comb! Oh, frog… Wow. My lamp works.