What, did you think Idea Man would make us feel thankful and content? Ha! Please. We’re Muppet fans. The more you feed us, the hungrier we get, just like a monster from Greek mythology, I’m guessing.
Not to speak for the whole fan community, but to write for the whole fan community, these are the top ten most wanted follow-up projects to Ron Howard’s documentary Jim Henson: Idea Man:
#10 Jane Henson’s story
We wrote about this last year, but it’s still true: Ron Howard has not answered my calls about Idea Lady. Jane Henson’s story deserves to be told, whether she likes it or not, so we’re still asking for it.
#9 The Joan Ganz Cooney Story
According to legend, when Joan first saw Jim Henson, she said, “Is that man going to kill us?” We now know that she never really said that, which raises the question, what did she really say? Has she ever spoken a word? We need a documentarian to find out!
#8 Frank Oz: Cool Beans
Frank Oz was the voice actor who voiced so many of our favorite voices. You know, like Fungus from Monsters, Inc. I’d like to hear him try to tell us that the voice was only 10% of that.
#7 Bernie Brillstein: The True Story
Jim Henson’s friend and agent, Bernie, had so many stories about meeting people in his career who he thought looked just like Jesus, including Elvis, and I’d love to hear him explain that resemblance.
#6 Bernie Brillstein: The False Story
Jesus visits Bernie with bad news: they’re going to tear down Heaven to drill for oil! Now it’s up to Bernie to round up all his old clients to put on the best darn variety show the spirit realm has ever seen.
#5 Jim Henson: In Bob Payne’s Words
I never understood why the “In Their Own Words” documentary about Jim Henson was mostly interviews with people who were noticeably not Jim Henson. Well, there’s no ambiguity this time: it’s just Sam & Friends performer Bob Payne. He explains everything Jim did after Bob left the company from his own perspective, with remarks like, “Then he did The Dark Gemstone or something, which I didn’t understand,” and “I heard Fraggle Rock was good, but I wasn’t about to pay for HBO just for that.”
#4 Being Elmo: The Ryan Dillon Story
A new dub of Being Elmo: The Kevin Clash Story with Ryan Dillon voicing all of Kevin’s lines.
#3 Not Being Elmo: The Ryan Dillon Story
From Kip to Felix, this documentary about Ryan Dillon covers every detail of his career that it possibly can without ever mentioning Elmo.
#2 The Life and Death of Jeffrey Katzenberg
Half documentary about the life of the Disney executive who made Jim more anxious than ever before, half snuff film. Think of all the people who would happily work on this for free.
#1 Joan Ganz Cooney’s Got an Elephant Gun
Joan Ganz Cooney tells the story of her life while brandishing an elephant gun.
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Huh. So it turns out that I’m bad at this. Even you could have done a better job.
Dang, this should have been a “call for submissions” article instead. Hold on, let me start over…
Call for Submissions: Muppet Docs
Ah, that’s better.
Send us your Henson documentary ideas, silly or serious, in the Discord channel for this article or in an email to jdhansel@toughpigs.com by August 7, 2024. If we get enough submissions, we’ll follow up with another article to show off how desperate I MEAN CREATIVE this fan community is. If we don’t, it means nobody reads to the end of my articles, which I guess I already knew.
Keep in mind that I can’t move any of these ideas any closer to production than you can. I basically have no connections. Despite what I tell people when I go to MOMI, I am not Jarrod Fairclough. But, hey, nobody’s perfect! Especially not Jarrod Fairclough.
Click here to support documentary projects like How Crayons Are Made: The Extended Cut on the ToughPigs Discord!
by J.D. Hansel – jdhansel@toughpigs.com
