March 7, 2005: When you get right down to it, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition is a two-hour show, which masquerades as two one-hour shows. In the first hour, Ty Pennington and his team rebuilt the Harris family’s home, and then in the second hour, they kinda did the same thing again, but with different footage. The Muppets were featured again, wreaking havoc in the name of a good cause…


anthnewstuff03aa anthnewstuff03ab


(In her trailer, Miss Piggy has worked herself up.)

KermitPiggy, what’s wrong? 

PiggyOh, Kermie… We’re on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, and they won’t give me a script!


anthnewstuff03ac anthnewstuff03ad


Kermit Piggy, there is no script. It’s a reality show! 

PiggyAh ha ha ha! Reality? 

KermitMm hmm. 

PiggyKermie, I’m from Hollywood. I don’t do reality. 


anthnewstuff03ae anthnewstuff03af


Kermit No, no, no. It just means that there’s no script. We just say whatever we want, and they tape it!

 PiggyWhatever we want?

 KermitWhatever we want.

 PiggyDear, come in for a close-up.


 PiggyYes. That’s good.


   anthnewstuff03ag anthnewstuff03ah


Piggy Hello, ABC! This is Miss Piggy! And I think it’s about time I got my own show! Something classy — yet steamy! Oh, I know… Desperate Divas! Yes! Ah ha ha ha! 

 KermitPiggy, will you come on? We’ve got to get to work. There’s a house to build!

 PiggyKermie, we’re divas. We don’t build homes — we wreck ’em!


anthnewstuff03ai anthnewstuff03aj


Kermit Ty’s waiting…

 PiggyOutta my way!

  (Piggy charges right over Kermit, out the door and into a montage.)


anthnewstuff03ak anthnewstuff03al


Animal Oh, my hand, my hand…


   anthnewstuff03an anthnewstuff03am


Kermit I’m a frog in a T-shirt!


   anthnewstuff03ao anthnewstuff03ap


Kermit How’d they do that?


anthnewstuff03aq anthnewstuff03ar

anthnewstuff03as anthnewstuff03at


Constance It was so great having the Muppets with us this week. 



anthnewstuff03au anthnewstuff03av

anthnewstuff03aw anthnewstuff03ax


Ty We had the Muppets, they came to help, and they were awesome… 

  (Kermit barks at a dog outside the trailer. Then he hears a motorcycle revving up.)

 KermitOh! My hog.

 PiggyBut I’m your hog, Kermie!


anthnewstuff03ay anthnewstuff03az


Paul There’s no one like the Muppets.

  (Fozzie struggles with a large box.)


anthnewstuff03ba anthnewstuff03bb

anthnewstuff03bc anthnewstuff03bd


(He drops the box with a loud, horrifying crash. He looks down at the wreckage, then turns to the people standing nearby.)

 FozzieHey, you guys are doing great. Keep up the good work!


anthnewstuff03be anthnewstuff03bf


Michael I’m not exactly sure those little critters actually helped us. But it was fun, having them around. 

(Michael surveys Kermit’s look.)

MichaelYou need a tan. 

KermitYeah… Well, I have to be careful. I have very sensitive skin.

MichaelDo you burn? 

KermitOh, yeah. Bright red.


anthnewstuff03bg anthnewstuff03bh


Kermit Well, I tried to pitch in wherever I could, y’know? Fozzie and I, and Miss Piggy’s around… 


anthnewstuff03bi anthnewstuff03bj


Kermit (shrieking into his megaphone:) Come on, come on, come on, we only have TWO HOURS TO GO!

KermitY’know, we’re fairly handy.


anthnewstuff03bk anthnewstuff03bl


(Fozzie approaches Paul at the workbench.) 

FozzieSo, Ty… 

(Paul reacts.) 

FozzieNo, you’re not Ty! You’re the other guy! 

PaulI’m Paul. 



  anthnewstuff03bm anthnewstuff03bn


Paul What’s amazing about Fozzie is everybody thinks, oh, you know, he’s not real smart, Fozzie’s not — he’s very, he’s a bright guy.

FozzieTy told me to come over and help you.

PaulYeah, so what can you do?

FozzieI can tell jokes.

PaulYou know what, how about a picture frame? You put a picture in it, give it to Michael, and they’ll hang it in the house.

FozzieI like it!


anthnewstuff03bo anthnewstuff03bp


Kermit You know, Paul was very, very nice to Fozzie.

PaulYou need to borrow any of my tools? What do you need —

FozzieOh, no, no. I got my own tools right here.


 anthnewstuff03bq anthnewstuff03br

anthnewstuff03bs anthnewstuff03bt


Ty Fozzie Bear and Paul ended up working on a project together, and it’s kinda funny, Fozzie’s a comedian.

(Fozzie starts unpacking his tool box.)

FozzieRubber chicken…

(He pulls an egg out of the box.)

FozzieAh ha ha! I guess the chicken came before the egg, huh?

(Paul looks up from his work. Fozzie tosses the egg over his shoulder, and goes back to the box.)


anthnewstuff03bw anthnewstuff03bx

anthnewstuff03by anthnewstuff03bz


Ty And, Paul? Well, he’s kinda funny, but he gets tired and grumpy, so seeing those guys working on a project together was hilarious. 

(Fozzie takes out a mop, a baseball, and juggling pins. Paul struggles to balance all of this on the workbench.) 

PaulYou want me to get you your own table? 

FozzieThis is okay. This is fine.

PaulThis’ll work for you? 

FozzieThis’ll work for me.  


anthnewstuff03ca anthnewstuff03cb


(Fozzie pulls a plastic pepperoni pizza out of his box, and carefully lays it on the table.)

FozzieIn case we get hungry later. 


anthnewstuff03cc anthnewstuff03cd

anthnewstuff03ce anthnewstuff03cf


Kermit Paul was very patient and nice. I don’t know what everybody’s talking about. Didn’t seem grumpy at all. 

(Fozzie tries to hammer with his rubber chicken. He swings wide, and smacks Paul in the face.) 


   anthnewstuff03cg anthnewstuff03ch


Constance Who knew Fozzie was a carpenter? 

(Fozzie shows off the picture frame he made.) 

FozzieWhat do you think? 


   anthnewstuff03ci anthnewstuff03cj


Ty Now, it didn’t turn out that great, but he really put his heart and soul into this thing. 

PaulI think it’s, it’s great. It’s great.


PaulIt’s missing something, aren’t we? 

FozzieWe are? 

PaulA picture. 

FozzieOh, a picture! Oh, right! A picture. Yes.


 anthnewstuff03ck anthnewstuff03cl

anthnewstuff03cm anthnewstuff03cn


Paul He’s just a great guy. He really helped me out a lot. He did a great job on his little picture frame.

(Michael grimaces as he hangs Fozzie’s picture on the wall.)

MichaelLovely. Not.

PaulYeah, a little narcissistic of Fozzie to put his own picture in the frame, but, you know… it works.


  anthnewstuff03co anthnewstuff03cp

anthnewstuff03cq anthnewstuff03cr



(The Muppets and the Makeover team get a picture taken.)

PhotogOne more time! One, two, three!

MichaelYou’re in my LIGHT!

PiggyOh, really.

MichaelOh, really!

PiggyIt’s MY light!

MichaelMY light.

PiggyMY light!


anthnewstuff03cs anthnewstuff03ct


Ty Miss Piggy was… interesting. She’s a bit of a diva.

PiggyFor a makeover show, you sure are shy with the blush. Come on, lay it on thick! Come on!


 anthnewstuff03cu anthnewstuff03cv

anthnewstuff03cw anthnewstuff03cx


Michael That pig had enough blush on her. But noooo, Miss Piggy wanted more.

PiggyWell, I would have been here sooner, but I misunderstood! I thought this was Extreme Makeover: Rome Edition. I just spent the last three days wallpapering the Sistine Chapel. (She’s unsatisfied.) I didn’t hear any laughs. 

(Off screen, people laugh.) 

PiggyThat’s more like it. 

(They laugh more.) 

PiggyDon’t patronize me! 


 anthnewstuff03cy anthnewstuff03cz

anthnewstuff03da anthnewstuff03db


Ty She’s great. Very aggressive. I mean, very aggressive. Very forward. 

PiggyHo-ly maracas! Who’s the guy with the hair! 

KermitOh, that’s Ty, Miss Piggy. He’s the one who invited us here. 

PiggyOh. Heh heh. Hello, Ty.  


anthnewstuff03dc anthnewstuff03dd


Constance She’s got a little thing for Ty. 

PiggyTy is every girl’s dream. He’s charming… he’s witty… and he knows how to operate a power saw. 


anthnewstuff03de anthnewstuff03df

anthnewstuff03dg anthnewstuff03dh


Ty Well, you look great. 

PiggyBecause I’m a fabulous star.  


PiggyLike vous. Ah ha ha! 


anthnewstuff03di anthnewstuff03dj

anthnewstuff03dk anthnewstuff03dl

anthnewstuff03dm anthnewstuff03dn



(Ty cracks up, and it takes a minute for him to get it together. Piggy turns and walks away.) 

PiggyOkay, let’s get this show on the road! 


anthnewstuff03do anthnewstuff03dp


Kermit You know what? If Piggy wants to throw herself at Ty Pennington, who am I to stand in the way? 

PiggyOutta my way! 


anthnewstuff03dq anthnewstuff03dr

anthnewstuff03ds anthnewstuff03dt



Kermit Hmph. Why should I care. I mean, I sorta care, but.  


   anthnewstuff03du anthnewstuff03dv


Constance You know, those kinds of things should be left off the job site, Miss Piggy.  


We meet up with the Muppets again later,
when the Harris family returns from Disney World
to see their new house…

anthnewstuff03ea anthnewstuff03eb

anthnewstuff03ec anthnewstuff03ed


Kermit You know, we were sort of honored to be a part of this, to be able to do something so nice for such a great family. It’s wonderful. The Muppets love to do things like that.   

(The family arrives in their van.)  

KermitIt’s the Harrises! Yaaaaaaaay! 


anthnewstuff03ee anthnewstuff03ef

anthnewstuff03eg anthnewstuff03eh


Ty Welcome home, Harris family! 

KermitLook, there they are! 

TyAnd of course, the sextuplets! 


PiggyI think I want six, Kermie! 

KermitSix what? 

PiggyYou know… 


   anthnewstuff03ei anthnewstuff03ej


Kermit Good grief. 


anthnewstuff03ek anthnewstuff03el

anthnewstuff03em anthnewstuff03en


Kermit You know, it was very touching when the Harrises came home. I personally shed a small tear. From each eye. One on each eye.


anthnewstuff03eq anthnewstuff03er


Piggy How do I look? Do I look good? I’m not shining too much, am I? I mean, I’m a star, I don’t want to shine too much, you know. Yes. I want Ty to really like me. I want him to like me. Okay. Oh, thank you, dear. 


anthnewstuff03es anthnewstuff03et


Here’s some promo shots from the Extreme Makeover website…

The first picture here includes Steve Whitmire and Eric Jacobson,
which is pretty unusual for these promo shots —
the puppeteers tend to stay out of sight.

anthnewstuff04aa anthnewstuff04ab

anthnewstuff04ac anthnewstuff04ad

anthnewstuff04ae anthnewstuff04af

anthnewstuff04ag anthnewstuff04ah

anthnewstuff04ai anthnewstuff04aj

by Danny Horn

Pin It on Pinterest