Breaking News
Part 6: The Beautiful Princess
Cast: Jim Henson (Kermit), Jerry Nelson (Beautiful Princess, Orange #1, Announcer), Richard Hunt (Blue, Purple #1, Green #2), Frank Oz (Green #1, Orange #2, Purple #2).
| Anncr
|
We take you now to Kermit the Frog for another fast-breaking news story! |
| Kermit
|
Hi ho, this is Kermit the Frog, speaking to you from the Beautiful Princess’ palace, where the story is that today she is going to choose from among her loyal subjects. She’s going to choose one of them to be her prince. |
| [ A small group of eager subjects squabble in the background. ] | |
| Kermit
|
And we are waiting now for the Beautiful Princess to make her appearance, here… [ fanfare ] I think I hear her coming now. |
| [ The Princess floats in. The subjects bow. ] | |
| Kermit | Awww, look at that, that’s the Beautiful Princess! |
| Kermit
|
Excuse me, Beautiful Princess, Kermit the Frog here, Sesame Street News, I wonder if you could just answer a couple of questions for our viewers out there… |
| Princess
|
Certainly, little froggie. |
| Kermit
|
Do you know which of your subjects you’re going to choose to be your prince? |
| Princess
|
Well, I don’t know, but I can give you a clue… |
| Subjects
|
Clues! Clues… |
| Kermit
|
She’s going to give us a clue! Oh, wonderful. Just speak into the microphone… What is the clue? |
| Princess | Ahem. He has bulgy eyes. |
| Blue
|
Bulgy eyes! I have bulgy eyes. |
| Green 1
|
Yeah, I have bulgy eyes too. Yeah. |
| Orange 1
|
Aw. That lets me out. [ He exits. ] |
| Purple 1
|
Yeah, well, me too. I don’t have bulgy eyes. I might as well leave. [ He exits. ] |
| Kermit
|
Uh huh… Well, a couple of people who don’t have bulgy eyes just left back there, Princess… |
| Princess | Sorry, fellas! |
| Kermit
|
Can you tell us anything else about him? |
| Princess
|
Well, he has a funny voice. |
| Kermit
|
A funny voice… |
| Purple 2
|
Oh! I have a funny voice! |
| Blue
|
Funny voice! Ho ho! Yeah, mine’s pretty funny! |
| Green 1
|
Yeah, but I don’t have a funny voice… [ He exits. ] |
| Green 2
|
I’m afraid, uh, mine’s not too funny either, so, uh… [ He exits. ] |
| Kermit | Okay, well, look at that, a couple more people who did not have funny voices just left… |
| Kermit
|
What else can you tell us about the prince? |
| Princess
|
Well, I can tell you that he has such small ears that you can hardly see them. |
| Kermit
|
Small ears, huh? |
| Orange 2
|
Well, ha ha! Heh! |
| Purple 2
|
Well… um… I have big ears… |
| Blue
|
You’re tellin’ ME! |
| Purple 2
|
That lets me out, huh? Okay, well, it was nice being here… [ He exits. ] |
| Blue
|
So long! |
| Kermit
|
Well, uh… there again, okay, one more person there with big ears just left, uh, what else can you tell us about him, Princess? |
| Princess
|
He’s wearing a hat and coat. |
| Blue
|
Hey! A hat and coat! |
| Kermit
|
A hat and coat… |
| Blue
|
I’M wearing a hat and coat! Heh heh heh! It’s ME! |
| Orange 2
|
Oh… I’m not wearing a hat or coat. I guess it’s not me. |
| Blue
|
It’s not! |
| Orange 2
|
I’d better leave. [ He exits. ] |
| Blue | Sorry! [ Excited, Blue rushes to the Princess’ side. ] |
| Kermit
|
Well, uh, listen, Princess, we’re narrowing the field down. |
| Blue
|
Ho ho! It’s me, right? |
| Kermit
|
There’s almost nobody left here… Is there anything else you can tell us about him? |
| Princess
|
Just one more thing. |
| Kermit
|
Oh, what’s that? |
| Blue
|
What’s that? |
| Princess | He’s a frog. |
| Blue
|
… Oh. Oh, well. Guess I’m outta luck, I, uh… thought I had a chance for a minute there, I… sorry. |
| Kermit
|
Okay, well, another person left there who isn’t a frog, we’ll just see who’s left here, uh… um… there’s nobody left here, uh… wait a minute. I’M a frog. |
| Princess
|
I know. I read in a book that if a Princess kisses a frog, he turns into a handsome prince! |
| Kermit
|
Yeah, but, uh, wait a minute… |
| Princess | And here I go! |
| [ The Princess kisses Kermit. There’s a puff of smoke… ] | |
| Kermit
|
Well, as you can see, I’m not about to change into any handsome prince, but, uh… |
| [ Kermit turns, and finds that the Princess has turned into an orange frog. ] | |
| Princess
|
Needeep! Needeep. |
| Kermit
|
Holy cow! Uh… listen, uh… you’re a rather attractive young frog there, uh, Princess… Ahem. Wanna go to the hop? |
| Princess
|
Okay! |
| Kermit
|
Ah! C’mon. |
| Princess
|
Mmm. [ Kermit and the frog Princess leave together. ] |
by Danny Horn
