Muppet Fans Who Grew Up

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

 

Halloween Parade 2009: Super Grover Bonus!


by Joe Hennes

Did you catch the annual ToughPigs Halloween Parade earlier this week? You'd better check it out! It's a pretty big deal.

ToughPigs' own Scott Hanson, who is also an administrator on the Muppet Wiki, has been collecting pictures of people dressed as Super Grover (hey, we all need hobbies!), and he was generous enough to share the pictures with us. And damn but is it a great collection!

So now, presenting the further adventures of everybody's favorite superhero, the man who is faster than lightning, stronger than steel, smarter than a speeding bullet... it's (people dressed as) Super Grover!






























Special thanks to Scott Hanson for providing these amazing pictures!

Click here to take flight on the ToughPigs forum!

joe.toughpigs@gmail.com

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Sunday, November 15, 2009

 

Halloween Parade 2009!


by Joe Hennes

Halloween has once again come and gone. Not only did we eat our weight in sweets, but we encouraged strangers' children to do the same. And while we work off those extra calories in preparation for indulging on Thanksgiving turkey (which we'll burn off before gaining Christmas dinner calories, which we'll burn off before Groundhog's Day brunch... it's an endless cycle), let's take a peek-a-roo at all of those nutty people who decided it was a good idea to dress as a puppet.

For past ToughPigs Halloween Parades, give these a click: 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2007, 2008.

And as always, give those naughty images a spanking a click to embiggen. Now let's get on with this craziness we attempt to pass off as entertainment!

I have to wonder how most ladyfriends react when their boyfriends suggest that they dress as Kermit and Miss Piggy. There's got to be at least a few who are insulted at the insinuation that she look like a snout-less pig. Still, it almost always ends up being a sickeningly cute couples costume. Also, I'm enjoying the number of people who modify a green hoodie with a collar and eyes for a simple Kermit costume. I would totally buy a collared Kermit hoodie for everyday use (are you listening, Disney???).

The Gonzo costume in the middle is my favorite of this collage because of the purple tux. That's all it takes to win my affection. He could be orange and I'd still award him bonus points for the tux. Though the Baby Gonzo in the upper right corner is a good-lookin' costume, even though he's way bigger than a baby. Minus points for the guy dressed as Jim Henson (top row, orange shirt) for thinking it's okay for Jim to be holding an Elmo puppet. It's not okay, and I wish you'd stop. Don't make me open a can of Muppet Wiki on you.

Now that's how you make a Jim costume. Alls you need is a beard, a brown jacket, and, y'know, a puppet that Jim actually performed.

This is what it would look like if your parents dressed up as Kermit and Miss Piggy. "Look kids! We're ruining your beloved childhood icons!"

People sure do like dressing up as Beaker for Halloween. I always love seeing the different ways folks build the giant cylinder head (of course, with the exception of the guy in the upper right corner). The Bunsens aren't bad either, though I don't think I've ever seen a Bunsen costume that wasn't paired with a Beaker. There's no love for (solo) Doc Honeydew.

The picture on the left is of ToughPigs' own Alaina, who went all-out on her Dr. Teeth costume, molding the necklace out of sculpey and threading the vest herself. If you could see the whole costume, you'd see that even the boots are accurate (thanks, Palisades action figure!). As for the people dressed as Animal, I have a theory that they only chose that costume so they'd have an excuse to shout obscenities after getting drunk.

The picture on the left is how the Electric Mayhem would look if they were real people. The picture on the right is how the Electric Mayhem would look if they were attending your wedding.

Apron? Check. Bow tie? Check. Giant eyebrows? Check. The Swedish Chef costume gets a lot of play every year, probably because he kinda looks like a real dude, and you can make it out of stuff you've got lying around the house. I'm giving double points go to the guy in the middle of the upper row, who actually built a puppety head that looks just like the Chef. But then I'm taking away all of his points because he gave himself puppety hands too. You came so close to accuracy, bro!

SCENE 1: COSTUME STORE, INTERIOR, DAY. "Hey look, that wig looks like David Bowie's hair in Labyrinth! If I just buy a Jack Sparrow shirt and some gray tights, I can dress as Jareth for Halloween! I'm probably gonna have to stuff the tights though..."

Sad Ludo has no friends. What'd you do to piss off the rocks, Ludo??

That sure is a lot of Sesame Street costumes. But really, I can't stop staring at that Telly costume in the lower left corner. I'd dress as Telly every day if I owned that costume.

In the past, I've complained that the giant-head Bert and Ernie costumes were starting to creep me out. The picture in the upper right corner has convinced me that the bigheads aren't so bad. Also, I am totally digging on those crocheted Bert and Ernie hats in the lower left corner. Though they are looking a little surprised to be hats.

So wait. Which ones are the real Bert and Ernie?? Too many unibrows!!!

Guys, seriously, you're not helping to stop those rumors about you right now. On an unrelated note, it looks like Bert's been working out.

There are apparently only two important things to keep in mind when putting together a successful Count costume: the sash and the widow's peak.

As far as couples costumes go, this is way better than the "plug and outlet", "Raggedy Ann and Andy", and "brick and brick layer" costumes put together.

You might've noticed how I (unintentionally) put these pictures in decreasing order of fuzziness, yet increasing order of grouchiness.

The Yip-Yip Martians make their triumphant return to the Halloween Parade, once again as one of the most popular Muppet costumes of the year. I wonder if the word "redundant" is in their book. ("Book, book! Uh huh, uh huh.")

I was surprised at the lack of Fraggle costumes this year: only one Red and two Doozers that I could find. I'm especially amazed at the girl on the left for her excellent Doozer helmet. Next year, I'm hoping for at least one Trash Heap costume.

The runner-up for the My Favorite Muppet Costume Award goes to this unbelievable Grover costume. If Grover was human-sized, this is exactly what he'd look like. If I saw that in real life, I don't think I'd be able to resist the urge to give him a hug.

But my favorite costume of the year goes to this Miss Piggy costume. Not because it's a terribly remarkable Piggy, but because it's obviously Miss Piggy from The Muppets Take Manhattan. She's got the 80s dress, the white purse, and the frizzy hairdo. But most importantly, she's got the scowl. Maybe she just saw Kermit giving Jenny the "huggies".

And that's it for this year's batch of Muppet costumes! Special thanks to Joy Satterwhite, Stephanie Kaye, Lucy Posen, Jonathan Little, Robyn Learn, Jen and Tim Coles, Alaina Breeden, and everyone else involved for sending in their pictures of themselves or their loved ones dressed like characters from a kiddie show.

Click here to dress up as the ToughPigs forum!
joe.toughpigs@gmail.com

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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

 

ToughPigs on the MuppetCast #5


by Joe Hennes

Ryan and Joe (that's me!) are the super special guests on the latest episode of The MuppetCast! We had a hearty chat with Steve Swanson about all the news and goings-on in the world of Muppets.

Click here to give a listen to the podcast. I hope you don't get tired of our voices, because we sure don't.

The MuppetCast updates weekly, so keep an eye on the website for future episodes! If my math is right, that's like a thousand episodes a year!

Click here to sing along with a podcast on the ToughPigs forum!

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Saturday, October 17, 2009

 

Wikiatrivia 2!


by Ryan Roe


Do you have your Thinking Cap on? Well, take it off right now and put on your Remembering Stuff About the Muppets Cap, because it's time once again for Wikitrivia! Below are a bunch of trivia questions about stuff that's on Muppet Wiki. Maybe you already know all this stuff because you're a great big geek, but if not, click on the answer links for the answers to the questions and craploads of further info.

And yes, I know you could just hover your mouse over the links to see the answers without reading the articles, but that would be cheating, and if you did that I would be very disappointed in you. I might even cry, and no one wants to see that.


1. According to his original performer Toby Towson, which Sesame Street character was initially conceived as "an acrobatic ape?"

Click here for the answer!

2.
The town of Coos Bay, Oregon inspired the name for what far-out fictitious location occasionally seen on The Muppet Show?
Click here for the answer!


3. What's the name of the donkey from The Muppet Musicians of Bremen?
Click here for the answer!


4. Who is the only actor to make cameos in two theatrically released Muppet movies?

Click here for the answer!

5.
From what college do the Muppets graduate in The Muppets Take Manhattan?
Click here for the answer!

6.
Which of the three main characters on Little Muppet Monsters was performed by Richard Hunt?
Click here for the answer!


7. Who is the mayor of Waterville in Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas?

Click here for the answer!


8. Where can you find a statue of Jim Henson and Kermit the Frog sitting on a bench?

Click here for the answer!

9. In the Fraggle Rock episode "Boober's Quiet Day," who is Boober forced to impersonate?
Click here for the answer!


10. What's the name of the seedy dive where Kermit first meets Fozzie in The Muppet Movie?

Click here for the answer!

11. What starchy deity is briefly worshipped by the citizens of Pangaea in an episode of Dinosaurs?

Click here for the answer!


12. What's the closing number of the Peter Sellers episode of The Muppet Show?

Click here for the answer!


13. Which Muppet rock band performed the song "Rock 'n' Roll Readers" on Sesame Street?

Click here for the answer!

14. A robot version of which American president ran amok on the Paula Abdul episode of Muppets Tonight?

Click here for the answer!


15. According to a 1977 Sesame Street song, what is Bert's favorite number?

Click here for the answer!


So, how'd you do? Click here to compare scores on the Tough Pigs forum!


ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Monday, September 7, 2009

 

ToughPigs on the MuppetCast #4


by Joe Hennes

It's amazing that Steve Swanson has been recording the MuppetCast podcast every week for over two years. Nice work, Steve! And double-nice-work for having the good sense to invite ToughPigs' own Joe and Ryan onto your show again. Well played, old chum.

Click here to listen to the latest installment of the MuppetCast, where you can hear me and Ryan chat with Steve about the ToughPigs Outing, expensive dolls, comic books, and America's Got Talent. And as a special bonus, Steve also chats with Street Gang author Michael Davis, who has a bit of good news to share about the book's reissue. Though if you're just interested in listening to mine and Ryan's voices, then feel free to skip to the 33-minute mark. Don't worry, I won't let it go to my head.

And of course, Steve is still recording a podcast every single week, so keep an eye on his site for upcoming episodes.

Click here to talk out loud on the ToughPigs forum!
joe.toughpigs@gmail.com

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Sunday, August 2, 2009

 

Muppets vs. Muppet


by Ryan Roe

I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of “Muppets.”

Not the Muppets, mind you… I think those guys are great. What I’m here to kvetch about today is the grievous misuse of the plural form “Muppets” vs. the singular “Muppet” in titles. For example, the division of Disney that owns Kermit and Gonzo and Mr. Poodlepants and the rest is called “The Muppets Studio,” and holy clam chowder does that bug me. The 2008 Christmas special was called A Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa. Does this not flip a switch labeled "BROW-FURROW" in anyone else’s brain?

When Kermit and Piggy and Marvin Suggs and the rest took the television world by storm in 1976, was their show titled The Muppets Show? No. When they made their motion picture debut in 1979, was the film called The Muppets Movie? No. Is their 1981 magnum opus called The Great Muppets Caper? No, sir or madam, it is not. We have The Muppet Show, The Muppet Movie and The Great Muppet Caper, and so we should have “Muppet Studios”* and A Muppet Christmas: Letters to Santa.

See? Isn't that better? The weird thing is, on the Muppet Show DVDs, each episode is proceeded by a logo reading "Muppet Studios." What happened to that?! They took a perfectly good thingy and made it a less perfectly good thingy!


“But hold on there, Mr. Ryan!” you might say. “What about The Muppets Take Manhattan? Surely – surely, I say! – you’re not suggesting it should have been called The Muppet Take Manhattan?!?!?!?!?” To which I reply: “Don’t be ridiculous, you little Dickens, you!” Here’s the difference. In The Muppets Take Manhattan, the word "Muppet" is a plural noun.** In the other cases I’ve mentioned, "Muppet" is more or less an adjective. That’s a good way to remember it, anyway: If the title still makes sense when the word "Muppet" is replaced by an adjective, the singular should be used. Let’s try it on some other titles:

The Funny Movie
The Entertaining Show
The Mellifluous Christmas Carol
Contagious Treasure Island
Excruciating Classic Theater
A Mongolian Family Christmas
The Bootylicious Musicians of Bremen

Yep, it works!

I’m not really sure where this problem started. Was it with the Ed Sullivan Show compilation DVD Muppets Magic in 2003?


Or could it be a misinterpretation of The Muppets’ Wizard of Oz? If you weren’t paying attention, you might miss the apostrophe, which indicates that this is not a Wizard of Oz that is exceptionally Muppets in nature, because that makes no sense, but is, rather, a Wizard of Oz which is presented by the Muppets. And I would not be shocked to find that someone at Disney wasn’t paying attention.


Okay then, I think I've run out of ways to take the letter S way too seriously, but I just hope this never happens again. If Kermit and Fozzie and Angel Marie and the rest make a new holiday special anytime soon, I don’t want to see A Muppets Halloween, I want A Muppet Halloween. Nor do I want A Muppets Thanksgiving, A Muppets Easter, or A Muppets Muppets Underwater. All I’m asking, really, is that they drop the S when it's not necessary. That’s not unreasonable, is it? I don’t think so.

And thus I conclude, and so I say: Thanks you and good nights. Um, I mean, Thank you and good night. Yes.

Click here to replace the word "Muppets" with an adjective on the Tough Pigs forum!



*”The Muppet Studio” would also be acceptable.


**Also, interesting fact: The Muppets Take Manhattan is one of only a few Muppet titles that are complete sentences. I can think of two others. How many can YOU come up with?

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Sunday, May 10, 2009

 

What's the Name of That Dog?


by Ryan Roe

I’ve hesitated to bring this up for a while now, because I’m afraid it may ignite the kind of controversy that could rip the Muppet fan community apart, pitting brother against brother and frog against pig, but I can hold my silence no longer. I must stand up and ask this question, which has been gnawing at my brain for untold ages:

What’s the correct way to pronounce the name of Rowlf the Dog?


Rowlf is one of the oldest and most beloved major Muppet characters. He’s been around for four decades, so you would think everyone would know his name by now, yet there doesn’t seem to be a universally agreed-upon standard.


Of course, I’m writing these words and not speaking them, so it would be pretty darn clever for me to just say, “It’s easy! His name is pronounced ‘Rowlf!’ HAW! HAW!” But no, that’s not good enough. I want to get to the bottom of this vitally important issue once and for all. So I’m writing this Muppet fan website article, which I believe will soon be considered one of the finest examples of journalism ever produced by man.
Let’s look at the evidence.

One way is to say it like this:
“Rolf.” It rhymes with “golf” (the popular sport) or “Dolph,” as in Dolph Lundgren (the popular actor who starred in the 1991 film Showdown in Little Tokyo). I had twelve of our Tough Pigs interns hit the archives for some research, and they found a few Muppet productions in which various actors used this pronunciation. For example, the audio clip below features Lesley Ann Warren on The Muppet Show. This is where she thinks she’s doing a song with Rowlf, only to find Marvin Suggs onstage.


But honestly, is the chick who played Cinderella on TV really an authority on Muppet names? So for further credibility, here’s another one. It’s the announcer from
John Denver and the Muppets: A Christmas Together.



It’s not unreasonable to think he received some kind of coaching on how to say the characters’ names at the recording session, right? Even more persuasive than that, though, is this clip from
one of the recent Muppet videos on YouTube, in which Rowlf’s fellow Muppet, Rizzo, clearly says “Rolf.”



So that’s one pretty crappy example, one so-so example, and one good example. But I have to say, I don’t think this is the correct pronunciation.

For one thing, the name has a W in it. Where is that W when you make Rowlf’s name rhyme with 18 holes and the guy who played Ivan Drago? For another thing, Rolf is a German name, and while I don’t think it’s ever been revealed what breed of dog Rowlf is, he’s definitely not a German shepherd.


So let’s look at another option: Pronouncing it the same way as the name “Ralph.” Here’s one guy who says it that way: It’s Jimmy Dean, the fellow who gave Rowlf his big break on national television. This next clip is from a sketch on
The Jimmy Dean Show, naturally.



So there’s that. But you might say, “Jimmy Dean is just some yokel country singer who happens to make delicious sausage-and-egg biscuits. What does he know?” And you’re absolutely right -- Jimmy Dean
does make delicious sausage-and-egg biscuits. But here’s a presumably more reliable source, a lady who never had a hit country song in her life: It’s Jane Henson, and this clip is from the PBS Great Performances special, The World of Jim Henson.



And check this out… From the same documentary, a guy even closer to the character than Jane: It’s Frank Oz, the man who was chiefly in charge of making half of Rowlf’s fingers wiggle in the early days.




To my ear, they’re definitely pronouncing it “Ralph,” as does Rowlf’s co-worker Scooter in this clip from
The Muppet Show.




You might think I’ve come to the conclusion that “Ralph” is definitively the correct way to pronounce Rowlf’s name. Well… not exactly. The way I’ve always understood it,
Rowlf’s name should be pronounced almost like “Ralph,” but not quite. When I say it, it’s kinda like “Raowlf” or “Raoulf” or maybe “Raaouhwlff.” I’m pretty sure Jim Henson intended for the character’s name to recall the sound of a dog barking, so I figure “Rowlf” is the canine version of “Ralph.” Like, maybe if dogs could talk, that’s how they’d say it.

Fortunately, Rowlf is, in fact, a dog who can talk, so he’s the ultimate authority on his own friggin’ name. Now here’s where the definitive evidence comes in. This first clip is from
The Muppets Go Hollywood.



And here’s one we’ve all heard at least fifty-five thousand times: It’s from the intro to “I Hope That Somethin’ Better Comes Along” on the
Muppet Movie soundtrack.



I’ve just listened to those two snippets four thousand times each, and no matter how I twist and bend my ear, I just can’t get it to hear “Rolf.” To me, it sounds mostly-but-not-exactly like “Ralph,” so that’s the pronunciation I’m sticking with. If Lesley Ann Warren wishes to challenge me on this, she can contact me at the e-mail address below.


I’ve just written way, way, way, way, way too many words on this topic (way, way, way), but now I’m curious, and I’d love to know which pronunciation is more prevalent among Muppet fans, so I went ahead and started a poll on the Tough Pigs forum. It’s a poll, technically, but I see it more as a survey. The question: How do you pronounce Rowlf’s name? “Rolf?” “Ralph?” Or the more nuanced “Raoulf?” Or maybe you have yet another pronunciation.

So click here and place your vote now!
Meanwhile, I can’t help but think that all this hullaballoo could have been avoided if Jim Henson had just named his dog puppet “Waggington” like he considered.
Click here to talk about Rowlf’s name on the Tough Pigs forum! Or did I already say that?

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Thursday, April 2, 2009

 

A Frazzled Frog Is a Funny Frog


by Ryan Roe

Who is Kermit the Frog? He's often described as the glue that holds the Muppets together. When Jim Henson's colleagues are asked which character Jim was most similar to, the frog is often the first one name-checked: He was the guy making everything work, a straight man in the middle of a throng of eccentrics.

All of which is great, but you know when I really love Kermit? When he freaks the hell out. One complaint fans have of recent Muppet projects is that Kermit just doesn't lose his temper like he used to, which is a valid point. He's supposed to be a funny character, and he's never funnier than when he loses his cool.

Here are some of my favorite instances of Kermit losing his composure, rated on a scale of 1 (lowest) to 10 (highest) I'm call the Freakout-o-meter, and some of which are accompanied by nifty links to the Sesame Street Video Player and YouTube.

-Grover Sells Sunglasses
On Sesame Street, Kermit is free of the insanity of The Muppet Show, but he still gets to play straight man to some crazy characters. Kermit was often paired with Grover to great effect, including a series of sketches in which Grover is a salesman trying to sell Kermit products he can't really use. I guess these sketches wouldn't really work as well now that door-to-door salesmen are a nearly extinct species, but I think we can all absolutely identify with Kermit here, as he struggles to keep his temper right up until the moment when he chases Grover out of his house.

On the Freakout-o-meter: 3
Watch it on YouTube!


-"I wish I'd never been born!" Freakouts are seemingly rarer in Kermit's Steve Whitmire era, but Whitmire showed us he could bring the frantic with Kermit's Christmas Eve rant in It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie. The Muppet Theater has been lost to a greedy corporate type, and Kermit blames himself. His self-loathing diatribe to Daniel the angel (which mostly consists of variations on "I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN BORN!") is really just a device to steer the movie into the "world without Kermit" sequence, but it manages to be sad and hilarious at the same time.
On the Freakout-o-meter:
9



-Cookie Monster and the Mystery Box
Kermit was paired with Cookie Monster much less frequently than with Grover, but here we see that Cookie is just as skilled at pushing the frog's buttons. In this sketch, Kermit is frustrated by Cookie's willful, persistent ignorance.

On the Freakout-o-meter:
6
Watch it on YouTube!


-"Who hired this crew?"
No doubt most Muppet fans would consider it to be a minor entry in Kermit's history of rants, but this Whitmire-era freakout from Muppet Treasure Island deserves an honorable mention. After the roll call scene establishes that the Hispaniola's crew is full of unsavory characters, Kermit's Captain Smollett demands to know: "Who hired this crew? This is undoubtedly the seediest bunch of cutthroats, villains, and scoundrels I have ever seen, so who hired them?!" It's slight compared to some of these other moments, but I'm pretty sure this was the first time we saw Steve Whitmire's Kermit lose his temper, so it was like a sweet reunion with an old, beloved, yelling friend. (By the way, it was Mr. Bimbo, the little man who lives in Fozzie's finger. He hired the crew.)

On the Freakout-o-meter:
2




-The Wonderful World of T-shirts

All Kermit wants is a T-shirt with his name on it. But if he got what he wanted, we wouldn't have this Sesame Street sketch, with appearances by Kermit the Forg, Kermit the Grof, and Kermit the Gorf... and the inclusion of Kermit's exasperated line "I'm Kermit the Frog and I told you I want my Kermit the Frooooog t-shirt!" to which Frank Oz's shopkeeper Muppet responds, "No need to get emotional!" Left unanswered: Why Kermit is already wearing a Kermit the Frog t-shirt when he arrives at the store. How many does he need, anyway?

On the Freakout-o-meter:
6
Watch it on YouTube!

-Kermit insults Piggy's heritage
I debated whether to include this one, because it's not really Kermit getting mad so much as Kermit being mean to Piggy. In the John Denver episode of The Muppet Show, Kermit is chagrined to find that none of his fellow Muppets are looking forward to their camping trip to the swamp. Piggy is particularly unenthusiastic, and when Kermit figures this out, he gets a little testy: "We don't have to go to the swamp. We can go back to where you were born -- the sty! You know, where your roots are! Where pigs eat swill and wallow in the mud! Remember that?" This does not persuade Piggy to look forward to the swamp.

On the Freakout-o-meter: 2


-Stop That Bus Stop
Even rarer than a Kermit/Cookie Monster pairing is a Kermit/Oscar the Grouch pairing, and this one finds Kermit understandably displeased when Oscar tries to build a bus stop in his living room. "This is a terrible place for a bus stop! What kind of bus is going to drive into my living room?!" he demands, and of course the next thing that happens is a bus drives into his living room. You can't stop civic progress. As I was watching Sesame clips in preparation of this article, I noticed that they almost never used the same set more than once to represent Kermit's apartment, but if you think about it, there's a perfectly reasonable explanation: He keeps moving, in a desperate, futile effort to prevent the other Muppets from dropping by and annoying him.

On the Freakout-o-meter:
4
Watch it on the Sesame Video Player!


-Kermit's Telephone Demo

So we've seen Kermit abused by Grover, Cookie Monster, and Oscar. Now how about America's dumbest urban cowboy, Forgetful Jones? In this sketch, Kermit tries to teach Forgetful how to use the telephone, and of course everything goes smoothly and Forgetful gets it right on the first try and nothing funny happens whatsoever.

On the Freakout-o-meter:
3
Watch it on the Sesame Video Player!

-Piggy is fired
This is the one, right here. In the Loretta Swit episode of
The Muppet Show, Miss Piggy leaks a story to a tabloid that she and Kermit are secretly married. To say that Kermit is unamused would be a vast understatement. "I will not stand around while you do dumb things like that!" he snaps, and when she asks what he's going to do about it, he has an answer: "I'll tell you what I'm going to do, Piggy, I'm going to fire you! Piggy, you are fired! You are fired, Piggy! You are fired! FIRED!" And he fires her! But of course she's back by the end of the episode. You know, sometimes when I watch this stuff it really hits me just how dysfunctional Kermit and Piggy's relationship is.

On the Freakout-o-meter:
10
Watch it on YouTube!


-"Go ahead and walk!"

In
The Great Muppet Caper, Kermit confronts Piggy at a duck pond in the park, the day after she tricked him into believing she was Lady Holiday. This scene is really more about Kermit and Piggy snapping at each other...

PIGGY: I'm playing over 800 different emotions here!
KERMIT: Well, why don't you try playing one of them right?!
PIGGY: I have a career of my own! I don't need this lousy duck pond!
KERMIT: Okay, sure, go ahead, walk! Walk! Go ahead and walk!

...than a rant from Kermit, but it's entertaining as always to see him make scrunchy faces and breathe heavily. Naturally, this scene of Kermit and Piggy screaming at each other is immediately followed by the most romantic scene in the movie, the "Couldn't We Ride" number.

On the Freakout-o-meter:
5


-The Huggies

And here's another classic Kermit/Piggy scene that confirms the notion that for these two crazy lovebirds, yelling is like foreplay. Kermit's just discovered that Piggy (whom he thought was far away at a new job) has been spying on him and his new friend Jenny. If she's just a friend, Piggy demands, why were you giving her the huggies? And then I just have to quote the scene:

KERMIT: Jenny and I were hugging because we're friends! That's what friends do! Friends do not spy!
PIGGY: I spied because I care!
KERMIT: I care too!
PIGGY: Well, why don't you say so?!
KERMIT: I JUST DID!
PIGGY:
ALL RIGHT!
KERMIT: AAAGH!
PIGGY: AAAGH!
KERMIT:
AAAGH!
PIGGY: AAAGH!

So the only thing that can come next is a romantic carriage ride around Central Park.


On the Freakout-o-meter:
8


Now I'm trying to remember, and I honestly can't: When was the last time we saw Kermit yell? I can only hope it happens in the next Muppet movie. I mean, lots of Muppet characters and guest star cameos are great, but could we have Kermit flipping his lid, please? Thanks.


Click here to tell me which Kermit freakouts you can't believe I forgot on the Tough Pigs forum! And scroll down to the previous post for some Tough Pigs April Fools' Day merriment!


ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Thursday, March 12, 2009

 

Redesign That Bird: RESULTS!


by Ryan Roe

Back in this post, I showed you the cover of the new 25th anniversary DVD release of Follow That Bird, and pointed out the sneaky move of putting Elmo on the cover when doesn't have any kind of significant role in the movie. Then I asked you to come up with your own Follow That Bird covers.

I got some great responses, so how about we look at them now? Do yourself a favor, and click on these to make them bigger!

Scott H:


Jarrod F:



Paul B:


Joe H #1:


Michal R:


Mike C:


Phil R:


Joe H #2:


Mo W:


Frank:


Joe H #3:

I tell ya, if Sesame Workshop would just put any of these designs on the real cover, they'd sell... well, they probably wouldn't sell many copies. But Tough Pigs readers sure are a creative bunch. Big thanks to everyone who submitted a cover, and don't forget to look for the new Follow That Bird DVD on March 24th!

Click here to follow that DVD on the Tough Pigs forum!

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Thursday, March 5, 2009

 

Wikitrivia!


by Ryan Roe


When was the last time you checked out the Muppet Wiki? You can learn a lot just by clicking around randomly for a few hours... There's really a ton of information there that you never knew, even if you're a huge geek, which, let's face it, you are.

So let's play a little game I'm calling Wikitrivia. Below are a bunch of trivia questions about stuff that's on the wiki. Maybe you already know all this stuff, but if not, click on the answer links for the answers to the questions and craploads of further info.


And yes, I know you could just hover your mouse over the links to see the answers without reading the articles, but come on, man. That's no fun.


1. What is the name of Elmo's large-headed father?

Click here for the answer!


2. Which Muppet performer played Scred in the Land of Gorch sketches on the first season of Saturday Night Live?
Click here for the answer!


3. Which Muppet Show guest star appeared in the film Cabaret alongside considerably more famous fellow Muppet Show guest stars Joel Grey and Liza Minelli?

Click here for the answer!


4. Which episode of The Muppet Show included a writing credit for "The Hatrack?"
Click here for the answer!

5. In Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas, which member of the Riverbottom Nightmare Band was performed by Richard Hunt?

Click here for the answer!


6. In 1981, the Muppets appeared in commercials for what camera company?

Click here for the answer!


7. What direct-to-video Muppet production featured Caroll Spinney's own puppet creations, Picklepuss and Pop?
Click here for the answer!


8. What 1974 Muppet TV special includes the "Froggy Went A-courtin'" sequence with Kermit riding a bicycle... five whole years before The Muppet Movie?

Click here for the answer!

9. The name "Rgllmzaxpoops" was briefly considered for which group of Fraggle Rock characters?

Click here for the answer!


10. Who was the guitarist for The Jim Henson Hour's house band Solid Foam?

Click here for the answer!


11. Which Frank Oz character sang the instant classic song "Accidents Happen" with Elmo in the 2007 Sesame Street home video release Elmo's Potty Time?

Click here for the answer!


12. What future teen drama star appeared in an episode of the Henson sitcom Aliens in the Family, in which he was eaten by the family pet?

Click here for the answer!


13. What's the name of the Egyptian prince who befriends Big Bird and Snuffy in the Sesame Street special Don't Eat the Pictures?

Click here for the answer!


14. What's the name of the restaurant -- well, it's more of a supper club -- where Kermit and Piggy dance and Lady Holiday's necklace is stolen in The Great Muppet Caper?

Click here for the answer!


15. What actor appeared with the Southern Colonel Muppet in the "Change Your Face" sketch on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1969?

Click here for the answer!

Click here to talk about incredibly interesting/obscure Muppet facts on the Tough Pigs forum!


ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Monday, December 15, 2008

 

The Ugly Muppet Toy Pageant 2008: RESULTS!


by Ryan Roe

Welcome, everyone, to the 2008 Ugly Muppet Toy Pageant. In case you've forgotten how this works, here are Sad, Pathetic, Broken-Eyed Cookie Monster and Drum Major Oscar to present the rules:


Over the past few weeks, the Ugly Toy contestants were rated, evaluated, and in some cases hated by the Tough Pigs community at large. People rated each toy on a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being "not that ugly" and 5 being "extreeeeemely ugly." Here, now, today, at last, finally, comma, we'll count down the "winners," starting with the Not That Ugly toys, and working up to the toys that have been voted by our readers as the ugliest toys of the year. Color commentary from the voters is provided for your entertainment.

Thank you, fellas. Sad, Pathetic, Broken-Eyed Cookie Monster and Drum Major Oscar, ladies and gentlemen. Let's hear it for them. And now, on with the results!

Not Really That Ugly
Wendy Loves Kermit - Madame Alexander, found somewhere on the internet
Score: 2.5

"Wendy thinks it's not easy being green, but try having a head that weighs more than the rest of your body." -Mary Catherine O

"If Wendy loves Kermit, what's she doing with this thing?" - Justin W

"Who's Wendy?" -Kris


Bert as a carpenter - submitted by Halfway Down the Stairs
Score: 2.52

"Bert looks like such a tool." -Michal R

"He won't get the job done, but he won't maul your children either." -Kris

"He can build a beach house in just a week, but it takes three hours for him to dress himself." -Lara F

"I didn't think there was much else you could do to make Bert look more uncool. I stand corrected. Mystified, disgusted, and corrected." -David B


Gonzo sugar bowl - Sigma, mid 1970s, found on Muppet Wiki
Score: 2.56

"It reminds me of something my crazy grandmother might have painted. In therapy. On her ward in the psych hospital." -Jessica E

"You can't tell me this isn't EXACTLY what Gonzo would do if he ever encountered a giant sugar bowl." -Grant

"I'm amused at the idea that Gonzo is portraying both the Mad Hatter and the Dormouse. Oh, and the town drunk." -Joe H

"From Gonzo's brief 'pickle-as-a-nose" phase." -Mary Catherine O

"...Right. Sugar." -Lara F

"When was Gonzo a disgruntled chimney sweep?" -Colin G



Retro Kermit - Brass Key Collectibles, submitted by Jamie Badminton, Halfway Down the Stairs, and Joe Hennes
Score: 2.68

"This is one of the worst things I have ever seen." -Tony W

"Who'd have thought you could admire Kermit's outtasite 'fro AND use him to wash dishes?" -Nancy P

"I love how it's called 'Retro Kermit' -- as if Kermit EVER did or would sport that look." -Justin P

"We know what Kermit looked like in the 70s, and it certainly wasn't the love child of Don King and Barry Gibb." -Mary Catherine O

"...the real kicker is his childbearing hips." -Mo W

Gonzo doll - submitted by Jamie Badminton
Score: 2.84

"How ugly can it be? It's not wearing a chili pepper tie." -Peter P

"It looks like Cookie Monster is swallowing Gonzo whole." -Michael H

"Probably gonna enjoy a HELL of a hangover in the morning." -Smig

"He wears it to his left just like I do." -James W

"That mouth... Why?" -Tony W


Elmo as Oscar - Sanrio, submitted by Danny Horn
Score: 2.84

"I am agog." -David B

"If we ever needed proof that Elmo was a horrific alien larva, devouring his victims from the inside before bursting, hideously swollen, out of their shriveled skins... er... why did we want that proof again?" -Justin W

"Is he wearing Oscar's skin? Is Elmo Buffalo Bill???" -Joe H

"You know, for those who think Elmo is taking over Sesame Street, this is some pretty damning evidence." -Ian

"...it just makes me wonder... what if it's REALLY Oscar in an Elmo mask? Or Grover in an Oscar suit in an Elmo mask? Or a vase? Or two people kissing?" -Colin G

Semi-Finalists: Kind of Ugly

Animal and Fozzie - Sababa, 2003, submitted by Tony Whitaker
Score: 2.85

"Jesus and Fat Albert, reunited at last!" -Mary Catherine O

"Is it their wedding day? I don't understand what's happening here." -Tim H

"You'd think the folks who decided to clothe Fozzie at all could have left him his dignity, or at least his hat." -Michal R

"Me try Hare Krishna! Now world all make sense. Bah-bye!" -Tony W

"These guys are at every college party I've been to, and they're always leaving with like, 12 girls! Jackasses..." -Ian

"Does Fozzie have breasts?" -Mo W



Guy Smiley beanie - submitted by Nancy P
Score: 3.04

"It's time for everyone's favorite game show: Wire-in-the-Socket!" -Michal R

"This Guy's eyes are in different time zones!" -Justin P

"I wore my hair like that every day in elementary school." -David B

"His chin is of Jay Leno-like proportions, and his smile is eerily reminescent of Heath Ledger's Joker. Terrifying." -Mary Catherine O

"What a remarkable likeness of the time Guy Smiley stuck a fork in an electrical outlet, had his nose redone, and put on just a touch of lipstick!" -GG

"More like Guy Creepy." -Michael H



Miss Piggy in a carrot - Nanco, submitted by Joe Hennes
Score: 3.24

"Ahh, this reminds me of all the TV specials and films where Miss Piggy drove around in her patented carrot car... So many memories..." -Justin P

"This toy is perfect, and I'm insulted to see it on the list at all." -Joe H

"Token phallic joke." -Peter P

"Is that Miss Piggy in a carrot, or are you just happy to see me?" -Michal R

"Not only does Piggy not really look like Piggy, the carrot doesn't really look like a carrot either." -Grant

"I'll believe it when pigs drive carrots... aw, nuts!" -Mary Catherine O

"The only time you'll see Piggy with a carrot?" -Lara F

"Having fallen on hard times, Miss Piggy has been forced to carjack Gobo Fraggle's 1988 Happy Meal Toy, which she will sell for parts." -David B


Elmo doll - submitted by Ryan Dosier
Score: 3.38


"Elmo, dear, you can't eat that much. Your eyes are bigger than your stomach." -Justin W

"Will anyone answer Elmo's supplication, or will he fall victim to the array of classic toys behind him? You decide." -Michal R

"The David Blaine Elmo: 'I will now make my eyes levitate out of my head!'" -Kris

"He's just trying to count the number of songs he songs he sings on Songs from the Street, which is directly equal to the number of songs I skip on Songs from the Street." -David B

"I know there's a joke here. But I just can't SEE IT." -Lara F


"...isn't Elmo furry?" -Justin P


Animal finger puppet - Starbucks, 2003, submitted by DJTR
Score: 3.44

"Does the look on his face read ecstacy or pain?" -Jessica E

"I sincerely hope the candy cane is wearing protection." -Michal R

"I have one word: DUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" -Nancy P


Finalists

Kermit doll - submitted by Neil Whitman
Score: 3.56

"What kid wouldn't want his own nauseous Kermit doll?" -Joe H

"This isn't Kermit. This is the haunting, empty carcass of the frog suit that Doc Hopper wore in his French Fried Frog Legs commercials." -Peter P

"Looks like the 'good grief' grimace Kermit makes." -Mini Skunk

"What's frightening about this doll is it looks like there's still a hand inside of it." -Ian

"Collagen implants finally give Kermit the pouty lips he's always wanted." -Michael H

"How many pool tables did they slaughter to make these?" -Smig

"Twenty-five years ago you could buy flawless Kermit dolls. Has technology been moving backwards since then?" -Tim H

"And look at the meathooks on that frog!" -Justin P

Waldorf doll - Toy Factory, 2007, submitted by Tony Whitaker
Score: 4

"Who the f*** wants a Waldorf doll?" -Mo W

"Is it me, or does Waldorf resemble a sock monkey?" -Jessica E

"Hey! I bet I can make a likeness of Waldorf with really round geometric shapes and undersized doll clothes..." "You're on!" -Kris

"It's Colonel Mustard in the balcony with the poisoned tongue." -Peter P

"Whatever he's caught in that throat of his will hopefully dislodge itself soon." -Nancy P

"...who knew he had such great legs!" -Justin P

"If the real Waldorf saw this, he'd heckle himself." -Smig

"Serenity now!" -Michael H

"This is not Waldorf. This is the elderly, asymmetrically-dressed offspring of an illicit relationship between Ziggy and a sucker fish." -GG


Oscar puppet - Applause, found on Muppet Wiki
Score: 4.08

"That Oscar looks like he smells like a trash can. Nice work, Applause!" -Joe H

"It's not often you see a naked Oscar doll, and this is why." -Tony W

"I know Oscar loves trash, but he probably doesn't love the garbage truck that just ran him over." -Mary Catherine O


Second Runner-up

Count doll - submitted by Halfway Down the Stairs
Score: 4.13

"I'm sorry, I thought you said it was a Count doll. I'd better put on my monocle and look again." -Michal R

"Kinda looks like John Travolta." -Mo W

"He looks kinda like some creepy guy you keep trying to avoid at a bar... otherwise, not so bad." -Kris

"Half vampire, half werewolf, all ugy." -Ian

"Also sold as the Laverne & Shirley 'Squiggy' doll." -Mike H

"I recommend decongestants, vitamin C and lots of product." -James W

First Runner-Up
Fozzie doll - submitted by Halfway Down the Stairs
Score: 4.36

"This. Is. Hideous." -D.W.M.

"It's ugly, but the facial expression really conveys Fozzie's desperation." -Grant

"I appreciate the artistry in catching Fozzie just after the viewer has drawn back the shower curtain." -Michal R

"I thought about docking this Ugly Fozzie points for being obvious, but then I vomited all over my keyboard." -Peter P

"I feel it's almost too easy to attack Fozzie dolls anymore. I grant this one a free pass. Go hobble about your life, Fozzie doll. But if I ever see you on my property again, I'mma get my gun." -David B

"What's obnoxious about this doll isn't its looks. It's the fact that this picture looks like the doll held the camera in front of its face and took the picture itself for its Facebook profile, and really, if you have so few friends that you have to resort to doing that, you have no business on Facebook." -Ian


And now, ladies and gentleman...
The moment you've all been waiting for...
Truly one of the most hideous toys ever created...


THE WINNER
Big Bird bean bag - Knickerbocker, submitted by Tony Whitaker
Score: 4.52

"Someone beat poor Big Bird with an ugly stick, and then chopped off his toes!" -GG

"Looks like he wants a hug but I'd steer clear, kids..." -Justin P

"This is what you get when Big Bird's brother and sister decide to have a baby." -Joe H

"Oh no! I stepped on my... AAAAUUUUGGHH!!! Keanu Reeves ate my brain!!!!" -Peter P

"When the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse come a-gallopin' down Sesame Street, this toy is our first sign that the End is Near." -Quinn R


And there you have it. Thanks to everyone who voted and everyone who submitted toys! I'm already looking forward to the next pageant! (What am I, a masochist?)

Click here to talk about ug-ug-ugly Muppet toys on the Tough Pigs forum!

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Wednesday, December 3, 2008

 

Chef Prøblem


by Ryan Roe

We've heard a lot lately about Disney's big plans for the Muppets in the near future, and it's all very exciting, because it means there will soon be lots of new Muppet stuff for us to buy. I mean, we all love watching new Muppet TV specials and movies and crap like that, but what we really want is more merchandise to take up space in our houses.

I just have one very important request to present to whoever is in charge of these things: Please never use this image of the Swedish Chef again.


I have no idea how long this photo has been around... Since the early 2000s at least, and probably longer. But I've seen it on jigsaw puzzles, coasters, magnets, and various other merchandise for years, and it just showed up on
the new 2009 Muppet calendar.

Did nobody at the photo session realize that this pose makes it look like the Chef is smoking a joint? It's practically begging for a quick, effortless PhotoShop job! In fact, I'm going to do an image search right now and show you all the different places on the web where people have taken this shot and turned the Chef into a pothead.

. . .

Huh. Okay. Well, I can't find any. For the first time ever, I'm actually disappointed that the people of the internet have refrained from corrupting one of my favorite family-friendly characters.


But my point still stands! It's not like this is a trademark gesture for the Chef. Has he ever even done this? Usually he uses his hands for much broader movements, like throwing rolling pins, or throwing spoons, or throwing chickens. Basically, he throws stuff. And anyway, it's not like there aren't other, better shots available. What's wrong with this one?


Isn't that better? Why can't that be the default Chef shot?
So far all I've done is complain, but I want to help too. So here are my suggestions for Five Other Things for the Swedish Chef to Do with His Hands:
  1. Smack a lobster.
  2. Perform the old "detachable thumb" trick.
  3. Juggle.
  4. Toss a pizza.
  5. Some other thing.
I've made my point, and now it's time to take action. I strongly recommend that all Muppet fans, Swedish or not, join me in aggressively rolling our eyes every time we see that picture from now on. I believe it will make a real difference. Thank you for your time.

Click here to roll up and discuss this article at my favorite joint, the Tough Pigs forum!

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Sunday, November 9, 2008

 

Halloween Parade 2008!


by Joe Hennes

There's only one thing I like more than eating my own weight in Milky Ways, and that's dressing up as my favorite Jim Henson creation. Actually, I'm a little too lazy to try and design an accurate Sherlock Hemlock costume, so I might as well live vicariously through the people who bothered to make the costumes themselves.

So without further ado (though I make no promises that there won't be a little ado by the end of this article), I bring you the latest installment of ToughPigs' Halloween Parade!

Don't forget, clicky clicky the pictures to make them biggie biggie.

Here's some group shots of some Muppet Show characters to start us out. Never has there been a better use of papier-mâché. I'm a little surprised at the number of Zoots, though there's always room for more Zoots in the world. Note the bottom left image, which contains Muppet Show guest star Loretta Swit.

Here's a few random Sesame Street characters. I'm shocked, simply shocked, that Bert is hanging out with Rubber Duckie. But my shock has abated after seeing The Count's abacus.Beaker, as always, is a popular character. I wonder if he feels safer in a car with Miss Piggy than in Bunsen's lab. I'd ask Bunsen, but apparently he's busy eating that guy's face.
Super Grover is one of my favorite costume ideas. That first guy makes me want a Super Grover hoodie for myself. And apparently, if I ever own a dog, that's how I'll dress him. Every day.
The Swedish Chef is a simple costume, so I'm always happy when someone goes that extra inch to make it more recognizable than a short-order cook. Like a scruffy moustache, or a baby dressed as a chicken, or hanging out with Zoot.
This is a pretty weak Red costume, but a well-done Gobo! I'd say that the banjo makes the costume, but really it's the yellow shirt and vest. Five seconds after this picture was taken, Gobo and Red started making out.Ah, now this is how to do a Red costume. Pom-pom hair, furry feet, a tail, yellow tights, and GIANT EYEBALLS! I know whenever I think of Red Fraggle, the first things that comes to my mind are eyes that can peer into your very soul.
None of these Cookie Monster costumes are anything to write home about, but the accessories are. A girl dressed as a cookie! A grouchy pal! Being on the equestrian team! Being a dog!Hey, it's Kermit!
Hey, it's Piggy!
Hey, it's Kermit and Piggy!And in case you were wondering what Kermit and Piggy's lovechild would look like...
Those two old guys in the balcony are pretty funny. I'll ask them what their names are once they wake up.
Aw, don't be so sad, Sad Elmo! Cheer up! I know what you need: a good tickle! No? Ok, fine. Be sad, Sad Elmo. See if I care.
Funny, I never thought of the Snowths as being Mahna Mahna's lady groupies, but somehow this picture makes it seem plausible.
Why would someone dress as Lew Zealand? Just for the halibut.
The laziest costumes in the history of history:
Ever wonder what Janice would look like if she was designed by Guillermo Del Toro?
I know I made this joke last year, but I'm constantly surprised when a guy dressed as Gonzo convinces his girlfriend to dress as a chicken. At least she didn't insist on him wearing his chili pepper shirt.

I normally wouldn't post this picture, because they look like Fraggles, but they very well might not be. But that one in the middle is obviously Boober. And maybe you can identify the Fraggles/ravers I couldn't.Those are some pretty rad Gobo and Red costumes, but I've never seen anyone actually dressed as Fraggle Rock! I hope he doesn't accidentally eat any of that insulation though.
So, do you think her head comes off? More importantly, do her pants?
Today was the day when I realized that Dr. Teeth looks like a hobo.
Crazy Harry, on the other hand, has always looked like a hobo.Someone call Wayne Szalinski, we've got a Doozer that needs shrinking.
That's right, it's a Bruno costume. I heard that's how Caroll Spinney came up with the idea.
Jareth from Labyrinth was another popular costume idea. The crystal ball is a nice touch, but the baby Toby is a nicer one.
No Halloween Parade is complete without one Sweetums costume. But just one.No, your eyes are not deceiving you. That is a Rowlf Cerberus costume.
In case you were considering dressing as a Yip-Yip Martian for Halloween next year, it's been done.
Oh, and kids sometimes dress up for Halloween too.
Thus ends the Halloween Parade for this year. Now if you'll excuse me, there's a Butterfinger with my name on it.

Click here to pity Sad Elmo on the ToughPigs forum!
joe.toughpigs@gmail.com

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Sunday, September 14, 2008

 

ToughPigs on the MuppetCast #3


by Joe Hennes


Special thanks to everyone out there in internetland for your great response to the article posted earlier this week about my experience on the Muppet set. But apparently, hard as we tried, we weren't able to keep the story to one medium. Sure, print may be dead, but radio is the wave of the future!

Check out the latest edition of the MuppetCast to hear my loverly voice rant about, well, pretty much everything I wrote about in this article. Hey, you never know, I may have accidentally mentioned something about that line of Muppet-themed Q-tips they've got planned. Whoops!

Click here to listen to the MuppetCast!

And click here to discuss my accent on the ToughPigs forum!

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Monday, August 25, 2008

 

ToughPigs on the MuppetCast #2


by Joe Hennes

Once again, Ryan and I (I'm Joe, nice to meetcha) have been interviewed on The MuppetCast, a weekly podcast hosted by Steve Swanson.

This week we all discussed the new Fraggle Rock DVDs and what we think about the release of the full-series set and the non-release of season 4.

Click here to listen to the podcast, and click here to go back in time and listen to our first interview with Steve, way back in February. And of course, go to MuppetCast.com every week for more podcasty goodness.

Click here to discuss this article on the ToughPigs forum (audio version not available in some areas)!
joe.toughpigs@gmail.com

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Friday, April 11, 2008

 

Your Most Treasured Muppet Possession: The Responses, Part Two


by Ryan Roe

Well, there you are! Welcome back! This is the second installment of Most Treasured Muppet Possession stories submitted by Tough Pigs readers. The first installment can be found here. Now, what the heck are we waiting for? Let's hear about more Kermit dolls and junk:

Marianne:

Unfortunately the Most Treasured Muppet Possessions I had in mind a little earlier are now outdated, since I just received MR Gonzo for my 16th birthday today (and he’s all adorable in his wittle purple tux, aww, etc.) So it’s a whopping three-way tie between that and the drawing I received from Elmo in Long Island:


And the 500 piece puzzle I glued to my wall (contains Lew Zealand, Angus McGonnacle, Sal, Bobo, Link Hogthrob, AND Clifford: what are the odds)



Mary Catherine:

My most treasured Muppet item would have to be my Fisher-Price Rowlf puppet.
Last spring, my mom picked me up in Albany after exams were over, and we went on a road trip to the University of Maryland so I could see the Jim Henson exhibit they had set up, watch Muppet clips at their library, and of course, take a picture at the bench with Jim and Kermit.

On the way there, we stopped in Princeton, NJ to visit my aunt. Before we left her house, she announced that she wanted to pass on a family heirloom to me that she had been saving for almost thirty years. I opened up the bag she handed me...and inside was the Rowlf puppet. She said that it had been a Christmas gift from my dad (her brother) to her when she was in high school and, amazingly enough, a really big fan of The Muppet Show.


Not only is it a pretty cool Muppet item to have, but now I have proof that my dad, for all of his grumblings about my fandom, does not hate the Muppets. Which means that all is right with the world.


Emma H:

My favourite Muppet possession is probably my 1984 baby Miss Piggy doll. I had one when I was little and stupidly threw it away when I was a sulking, miserable teenager. My brother trawled eBay to buy me one for my 21st birthday. It had to be the 1984 version, though - all the others of baby Miss Piggy are hideous. Especially the 1987 version, ugh.


I'm also very fond of my copy of Miss Piggy's Guide to Life and It's Not Easy Being Green because they both contain, in their own ways, some excellent advice... The thing I miss the most from my childhood Muppet fandom, though, is my Muppet Babies wallpaper. Unfortunately I don't have any pictures, but I remember it being white and covered in Muppet Baby heads! My parents let me choose it when I was about four, and they were worried I'd give myself nightmares. Never.

The two Muppet things I'd like most in the world are the complete collection of Muppet Babies on DVD (a dream that I suspect will be unfulfilled forever) and a Miss Piggy purse I once saw on eBay - it was covered in sequins and was very glam. She would approve. But I've never been able to find it again.
Gosh, this was a long post. Apologies!

Tim:

Number 1 is pretty easy, though I have to mention several runners-up.
This Kermit was released the year I was born, and has always been one of my most treasured possessions. I have no idea how he's managed to stay in good nick.

I was also terribly fond of my Baby Rowlf, though (like the Baby Kermit I have) the costume change puzzled me somewhat. I also have Piggy and Fozzie. Muppet Babies arrived at exactly the right time for me to latch onto it properly so it remains one of my favourite Henson properties.

Much uglier but also holding special places in my heart were the Fisher Price Piggy and Fozzie beanbags. They're fairly horrendous but in the flesh they have a bizarre charisma. Judging from the picture on the wiki, I should be glad that they had to hang out with the larger Kermit instead of his beanbag counterpart.


Alex G:

My most treasured Muppet item is a Kermit wired stuffed animal I
picked up in a small shop in Fergus Falls, Minnesota. I was just beginning my Muppet fandom, but Kermit accompanied me on The Ride Across Minnesota, raising money for Multiple Sclerosis.

He accompanied
me not once, but twice as I completed the ride. I changed it up for two years, once with a Ernie rubber ducky and an Animal stuffed animal (hehe), but both years suffered problems... Because I didn't have Kermit. For these reasons it is my most cherished and beloved Muppet item, even topping my 1986 Sesame Street figures (some of my first loved toys), or my Palisades exclusive Adventure Kermit, which I draw enjoyment from every day.


Wes:

My Most Treasured Muppet Possession is my Pigs in Space metal lunchbox!
When I was younger my grandparents managed a Mini-Storage place and they would pay me a few bucks to clean the abandoned units and if I found anything I got to keep it. Needless to say, I found a Pigs in Space lunchbox and kept it.

Several years later it went missing... I think someone stole it when everyone was in a metal lunchbox craze. Well, last year my brother got me one for Christmas, better than the old one, in mint condition and even has the thermos. My apartment's small so I proudly display it in the bathroom, so everyone can enjoy it when they come over.


Joe:
My MTMP is a Kermit the Frog beanbag doll. I've had it as long as I can remember and it's accompanied me to my first day of school, my first summer at sleep-away camp, college, apartments, and so forth. And it's still with me today. Somewhere along the line, the Frog went all pirate on me and lost his right eye. The eye has never turned up, and I've long since stopped searching. I still expect to find it in an old Cracker Jack box or something one of these days.

A few years back, a friend gave me the Fozzie Bear beanbag that completes half of the full set, which elates me to no end. So, while my one-eyed, droopy, lumpy, never-washed Kermit might not win any beauty pageants, he's a prom queen in my book, and I love him so.

Christer:
My Most Treasured Muppet Possession has to be, as with most people I suppose, my oldest. And that little treasure is the Norwegian version of the Fraggle Rock album, on tape. As a kid I *loved* the Fraggles! Actually I loved most puppetry, but the Fraggles were my absolute favorites, and I nagged and nagged until I got the tape, and then I played it and played it until my parents nearly lost their minds.

Somewhere along the way I managed to lose the cover (how could I lose that cover, and not lose the covers of any other tapes I had at that age!), and the tape is obviously pretty worn now, but listening to that soundtrack just puts me right back to when I was five years old and Fraggle Rock was the most exciting, scary and exhilarating place on earth. I never believed in Santa, I never believed in Jesus, or The Tooth Fairy, but I *believed* in the Fraggles! Just look at Travelling Matt - they were out walking around us!

Some few years later, a little older but still a huge Fraggle fan, I experienced the biggest high and the biggest low, Henson-wise, in my life. I read in my local paper that Mr. Fraggle himself, Jim Henson, was working on a project filming a book by Roald Dahl, one of my all-time favorite authors, and certainly my favorite at the time. This project, of course, was The Witches, a book which I had recently read and loved. The best part was; they were going to be filming in my hometown! Norway in the book was going to be represented by Bergen, and they would be filming right where I lived, in the yawn of a city where nothing ever happened! I was extatic!

Sadly, the joy did not last. Before the movie reached Norwegian theatres, both Jim Henson and Roald Dahl had died, only a few months apart. My euphoria had turned to absolute devastation, and I had to do some pretty quick growing up. Many years would pass without me thinking of The Fraggles as anything other than a show I loved as a kid.

This all changed when, five years ago, I happened to stumble upon my old tape. I put it on, and the memories all came instantly flooding back. After singing along to all the lyrics I still knew by heart, when I reached the end, I heard the instrumental version of All Around The World, a track that featured on most of the European releases. As a kid I always used to skip that track (I couldn't sing along to it!), but when hearing it again as an adult, it was just about the best darned piece of music I had ever laid ears on!

Today I own pretty much every Fraggle music release (as well as a fair bit of other paraphernalia, of course), and have about 10 copies of the 7" single of All Around The World, including mint, sealed and picture disc releases. People tend to describe me as a true Fraggle nut, walking around the office donning my "I Appreciate The Muppets On A Much Deeper Level Than You" T-shirt. Your post is filed with the tag fanaticism, and my Most Treasured Muppet Possession is the single piece of merchandise that truly launched the avalanche that took me from Fraggle fan to Henson fanatic - for the second
time in my life.

I hope I can still get a tape player when I'm 60. Or 80.

Scott E:
This one's easy, because my most treasured Muppet possession is my most treasured possession, period. Several years ago, a group of my friends decided to get me a Christmas present…why… I don’t know. Anyway, one of them is very big into books and frequents a lot of used book sites on the net. On one of these sites, he stumbled upon a copy of Of Muppets and Men. He knew I would love it, so he checked it out only to find that it was an autographed copy.

The woman who was selling it bought it in a huge estate sale and was selling off all the pieces that didn’t interest her. The inscription in the book reads “Christmas 1981. To Buddy with our love, Kermit the Frog, Jim, Dave, and all the gang”. My friend contacted the Henson archive to see if it was authentic and who Buddy was. They responded that it was authentic and that the book had been given as gifts to everyone who had appeared on the Muppet show that year, so Buddy was, in fact, Buddy Rich.

They also asked who my favorite Muppets and sent picture of the main Muppets, autographed by Animal and Pepe with their response. So…as a huge Muppet fan, who happens to be a drummer, and whose favorite Muppet is Animal, this book is by far my most treasured possession. It spends its days on prominent display in my great room.


It's Ryan again. I know this wasn't a contest, but we can all pretty much
agree that Scott won, right? I mean, I'd love to own any copy of Of Muppets
and Men. It doesn't even have to be previously owned by an awesome guest
star like Buddy Rich... I'd settle for one of the lesser ones, like Shields... or
Yarnell.

Anyway, thanks to everyone for the great submissions. And take care of your
Muppet stuff!

Click here to comment on this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Wednesday, April 9, 2008

 

Your Most Treasured Muppet Possession: The Responses, Part One


by Ryan Roe

Muppet fans love their Muppet stuff.

I gue
ss I already knew that, but now I have proof, in the form of a bunch of personal testimonials about beloved Muppet items. I asked for stories, and I sure did get them. Some people love their Muppet stuff so much they were unable to narrow it down to just one item, which is an indication either of how much our favorite bits of Muppet memorabilia mean to us, or of our rampant materialism.

As a result, I've split the responses into two articles. The first one is right here; the second can be found over here.

Now read on for a few of our favorite things:

Beth:

My treasured Muppet possession would have to be the Palisades Muppet theatre backstage playset. I mean, how cool is it? It's a perfect small Muppet show set that I can transport back and forth between college and home. And all the Palisades action figures that go with it of course, especially Sweetums.


Amy:
My Fisher Price Sesame Street Little People playset.

I got it for Christmas when I was four or five years old. I remember being upset that David and Maria weren't included amongst the Little People, but being very happy to have Mr. Hooper and Susan. (Guess I didn't give a rat's ass about Gordon!)

Big Bird, Oscar, Ernie and Bert were cool to have, too, but Mr. Hooper and Susan really made me happy. Mr. Hooper reminded me of my grandfather, and Susan was my favorite female role model at the time. She was a nurse, she drove a VW Bug, she wasn't afraid to talk back to Oscar -- how cool was that?!


Possibly the thing that fascinated me the most about the playset was looking into Bert and Ernie's apartment and counting the bottlecaps on the wall. They had the most interesting domicile of the apartments.
My brother and I also had the Fisher Price Castle. We used to have the Sesame Street people look around in the Castle for the Count. We also pretended that Snuffy lived in the dragon's dungeon in the FP Castle. Kind of dumb, but we had an awful lot of fun with that fantasy. I still have Susan and Big Bird someplace. I miss Mr. Hooper.


Jenny:
A plastic Snuffy wearing a scarf and beret. It was a toy at my grandma's until one day I never saw it again. Then, years and years later in high school, my theology teacher had the exact same toy on his desk, and I had a huge SIRE* moment. I tell him the story and he freaking GIVES it to me. Snuffy now resides on my Ledge O' Crap. (despite the name, it is where the most esteemed plushies and figurines live)

*[Editor's note: SIRE, for those not in the know, is a Tough Pigs-coined acronym for Sudden Instant Recall Effect]

Martha:
My oldest, most-loved Muppet posession has to be my Grover puppet, circa 1974. I absolutely love him. I remember taking him to kindergarten - when he was much prettier than he is now - for show and tell. I have a picture with me, age 4, with my brand-new Grover puppet, which arrived at about the same time as my brand-new baby brother. Guess which one I was more excited about...

It's not really a posession, but I'm also awfully proud of the INEBG* Bathroom, which has a brand-new Kermit display shelf.

*It's Not Easy Being Green

Melissa:

I have several, I don't have the Fisher Price puppet but I got the doll, I'd say out of TOYS, it would be that, my Rowlf puppet and my Fisher Price Ernie doll that looks like he was hiding out where they found Saddam Hussein. But I can't part with any of them.

As far as NON toys, my genuine Big Bird feather that they gave me as a Henson intern, my Muppet Treasure Island crew hat that Steve Whitmire gave me when I visited the set, and all my autographs and photos with Henson folks.

Peter:
My favorite... was probably a 3D stacking Big Bird puzzle. I can't find a picture of it anywhere on the Internet, though. My brother once mischievously hid the various pieces throughout the house and I don't know how long it was before I found the last piece in the cream cheese. I had once actually decided to give it to Danny or Scott for Christmas, but then I couldn't find it. And then I decided that even if I ever found it, I was too selfish to let it go.

Cathy:
My very favoritest Muppet thing is actually two things. When I was a wee little tot, my parents got me a Miss Piggy trinket box. It was a knockoff of a Sigma piece and it was obviously handmade, but you could tell it was made out of love.

Anyway, my parents spotted this thing at a garage sale and the person selling it said that his daughter had made it, but had "outgrown" her Muppet phase, so they sold it to my parents for a dime. I loved this little box so much. It always made me happy when I looked at it because it reminded me of how much my parents loved me and supported me and my love of Muppets.


Anyway, a few years ago when I got married, Danny (who didn't know about my knockoff Piggy box) gave me the real Sigma Piggy box as a wedding gift. And it was such a great gift, because I could tell it was really thoughtful and given from the heart.
And now both boxes are displayed proudly on my shelf, and while one reminds me of the awesomeness of my parents, the other now reminds me of all the awesome people I've met through the years here. All because of a shared love of the Muppets. Who knew?


Yancey:
Well... I would have to say my Miss Piggy Fisher Price dress up doll. My younger brother gave her to me for Christmas (probably in 1982?). I sewed her a number of spectacular outfits. She is one of my Muppet things I've owned the longest.
I'm also very fond of my Piggy Enesco Marie Antoinette and Cleopigtra dolls. They're just so awesome. I got those off of Ebay about 6 or 7 years ago.

Anthony:
As for my own most treasured Muppet possession . . . I've never been much of a collector of things that you can't watch, read or listen to, so it's not a toy or anything.


Actually, I've gotta say the first Fraggle Rock LP. The kindergarten teacher in my hometown found it in her classroom and gave it to me when I was about a freshman in high school. I had only seen a few episodes of the show at the time, and I used to spend hours lying on my bed listening to that record over and over and over.


Even now, when I've seen all of the first 72 episodes of the show and several of the last year, those are the Fraggle Rock songs that always come to mind - Follow Me, Wemblin' Fool, The Friendship Song, Muck and Goo, Do It On My Own, Doozer Knitting Song, Easy is the Only Way to Go, and The Beetle Song especially.


Kyle:
My most favorite Muppet possession would have to be a several because I can't just think of one. The first one would be my plush 80's Big Bird. My mom said I carried that sucker everywhere. It was mine and nobody could touch it unless it was my mom or my sister.

But my then for some reason my dad told my mom that he had to throw it away because i had ripped its head off, but my mom thinks he threw him away because I was getting too old for it. I've been looking for him everywhere but can't find him. Hope I find it on ebay one of these days.


The second one would have to be the Oscar the Grouch in a can where you blow into the hose and his head pops out of his trash can. Not mine but my cousins', and I played with it all the time.


Third one was a Fraggle Rock drum set, but then I busted out pretty much all the drums and that was it for that set of Fraggles. I feel really sorry that i destroyed lots of my toys as a kid so now if I find something I had as a kid I save it and keep it from bad little hands.


Fourth one would be still not be mine but still I played with it. It was the Kermit the Frog puppet just like the one on the front page. It was my cousins but a different one from the first one.


Fifth one would have to be a Baby Kermit that sat inside of a wheel that looked like a Ferris wheel and spun around. Don't know why I liked it but it I did.

Sixth one would be a Oscar the Grouch puppet that came out in the late 80's or early 90's. He's still in his can but you could move the mouth. It was one of the Fisher Price ones. I now have a Cookie Monster one too that I found at Goodwill. That about does it but that's pretty much my Muppet Treasured stuff I have.

Quinn:
This is impossible for me to narrow down. The Palisades action figures, taken altogether, are probably my favorite Muppet possession, but not necessarily the most "treasured." I love every single one of them, and there are some highlights like Adventure Kermit and the Jim Henson figure that stand out above the rest.

While they were all made with attention to detail and more care than most Muppet toys we had seen up until that point, there was something special about some of the figures. Purple Tux Gonzo is still my favorite version of one of my favorite Muppets, and even seeing the Master Replicas Gonzo--the eight dollar piece of plastic is a better likeness, and more fun, than the version I'd have to pay hundreds of dollars for. And because of that, I appreciate Palisades' work on the Muppets line.


As for the most treasured...this is probably a cop-out, because it's not technically a Muppet possession. My Rubber Duckie. Even though he's not a licensed Muppet(TM) product, I only have him because Ernie has a Rubber Duckie. My brother gave me Rubber Duckie for my 17th Birthday, which was 17 years ago. And even though now I'm on Rubber Duckie II, I still have that same unnatural attachment to, and affection for, my Rubber Duckie.

He goes on every trip with me, and Miles and Carter consider him almost as much a part of the family as they are. They know when it comes down to it, he's been in the family longer than they have, and if I have to make a choice, it'll get dicey. I have more expensive Muppet toys, I have rarer Muppet toys, I have a piece of Gonzo's fur on my fridge from Muppets in Space--but it's Rubber Duckie that I love.
I feel a song coming on.


Great stuff, eh? And I'm only a little bit envious at all the cool merchandise other people have that I never had. Click here to jump to Friday for more sappy nostalgia!

Click here to comment on this article on the Tough Pigs forum!


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Wednesday, March 5, 2008

 

What's Your Most Treasured Muppet Possession?


by Ryan Roe

Hey, Muppet fans! Picture this scenario:

Late one night, you're enjoying a pleasant dream about dancing rats when you're suddenly awakened by a bunch of aliens. Using their powers of telepathy, they explain to you that they’re working on a comprehensive project to study Earth (
last week they were studying entomology; next week is toupees), and they’ve just now gotten around to analyzing Muppets. They're going to take all your Muppet merchandise back to their home planet and you will never get it back, but they're going to allow you to keep one item.

So what will it be? Your vinyl LP of the Muppet Movie soundtrack that was the first album you ever owned? The Swedish Chef plush you got on your family's trip to Disney World? Or maybe a McDonald's Happy Meal toy of Mokey Fraggle driving an eggplant? Or a doll of Miss Piggy driving a carrot, a toy that actually exists but is sadly not on Muppet Wiki?

As Muppet devotees, we own a lot of stuff, and there are happy thoughts and memories associated with all of it. But I suspect I'm not alone in having one Most Treasured Muppet Possession. Mine is that guy in the picture up there: a 1978 Fisher Price "Muppet Puppet" Kermit.

For one thing, he's one of my oldest Muppet possessions. When I was just a tadpole of a thing, my parents went on a trip to New York City (leaving me in Grandma's capable care), and they brought me back this puppet as a souvenir. My parents provided me with a lot of Muppet toys in my early years, thus ensuring that I would grow up to be a total geek and spend the rest of my life wasting heaps of money on my Muppet collection. Thanks, Mom & Dad!

This puppet has been with me my whole life, just like my Muppet fanhood. It's moved from place to place (currently residing in my apartment in… New York City, which seems poetic somehow), and it's appeared in various school projects and home videos. When those trademark squinty eyes began to rub off, I filled them in with a black Sharpie, a fact that becomes painfully obvious on close inspection. (I can only hope that somebody, someday, cares enough to fill in my eyes with a Sharpie when I get old.)

What's your Most Treasured Muppet Possession? I want to know. Where'd you get it? How long have you had it? What's so special about it, anyway? You can tell me by sending an e-mail to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com, or just drop by the Tough Pigs forum and talk it about there. If you have a photo of it, that's great, but by no means necessary.

Then I'll post the best stories right here on ToughPigs.com. I'm not going to put a deadline on it or anything... Let's just say I'll give it a few weeks. And if you don't have a Most Treasured Muppet Possession, why not go out and get one? I bet you could find an old, used Baby Gonzo toothbrush on eBay for pretty cheap.

Click here to talk about your Most Treasured Muppet Possession on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Wednesday, February 27, 2008

 

Who will be Jim?: RESULTS


by Joe Hennes


It's been almost a month since I announced the "Who Will Be Jim" contest, and we're ready to crown the winners! Ok, so there aren't any actual "winners," much like in a soccer game. Except that sometimes people do win in soccer. So maybe that wasn't the best analogy. The special prize for those of you who participated in giving us your thoughts on who could play Jim Henson and Company is getting to see your name in print in a Muppet Fan blog. Congrats!

Now let's get to the Jims (and Franks and Jerrys and Richards, etc)!

Jim Henson

Robert Downey Jr. (suggested by Kynan)


Steve Whitmire (suggested by Kellie)


Johnny Depp (suggested by Neil)


Josh Charles (suggested by Kynan)


Jeff Daniels (suggested by Brad)


John Cusack (suggested by Kynan)


William Hurt (suggested by Joe)


Jason Segal (suggested by Kynan)


Daniel Day-Lewis (suggested by Ryan)


Ryan Gosling (suggested by Brad)


Jeff Bridges (suggested by Joe)


Cate Blanchett (suggested by Peter)


Frank Oz

Peter Sarsgaard (suggested by Kynan)


David Cross (suggested by Brad)


Bernie Brillstein

Robert Prosky (suggested by Andrew)


Richard Dreyfuss (suggested by Kynan)


Jerry Juhl

Andy Richter (suggested by Ryan)


Philip Seymour Hoffman (suggested by Tom)


David Lazer

Tony Shaloub (suggested by Kynan)


Bradley Whitford (suggested by Kynan)


Lew Grade

Robbie Coltrane (suggested by Ryan)


Jim Broadbent (suggested by Andrew)


Bob Hoskins (suggested by Andrew)


Maurice LaMarche (suggested by Michal)


Richard Hunt

BJ Novak (suggested by Kynan)


Jay Baruchel (suggested by Kynan)


Hank Azaria (suggested by Joe)


Jane Henson

Maggie Gyllenhaal (suggested by Kynan)


Chris Langham

Hugh Laurie (suggested by Ryan)


Dave Goelz

Joshua Malina (suggested by Kynan)


So, if anyone from the offices of Penny Marshall are reading, now you know who to cast. See, we make it easy for you!

And if anyone has more ideas for who you think should play Jim & Co., please stop by the ToughPigs forum and let us know!
Click here to discuss the many beards of Jim on the ToughPigs forum!

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Sunday, February 24, 2008

 

ToughPigs on The MuppetCast!


by Joe Hennes

Have you ever wondered what Ryan and Joe's voices sound like? If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, then you're in luck! ToughPigs' own Senior Contributors were interviewed by Steve Swanson last week, and now we're featured on his latest podcast!

Tune in and you'll hear what Joe really thinks of Mr. Magorium, Ryan's obscure Muppet impressions, and who Pepe the King Prawn is romantically linked to.

If you're an impatient fellow, the ToughPigs interview starts about 34 minutes into the podcast (UPDATE: the MP3 version starts at 34 minutes, but it starts at 47 minutes when you play it directly through the MuppetCast website.. no idea why that is), but I recommend listening to the whole dang thing. Steve puts a lot of effort into the show every week, and the quality speaks for itself.

Click here to listen to the podcast, and go to MuppetCast.com every week for podcasty goodness.

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Monday, February 11, 2008

 

Who will be Jim?: UPDATE


by Joe Hennes


Lots of folks got lots of ideas over on the ToughPigs forum about who's got the chops to play Jim Henson in a possible feature film. But as we all know, Jim's only part of the story. Who will play Frank Oz? Steve Whitmire? Jerry Juhl? Frank Biondo?

Yeah, all bets are off! Cast everyone in The Works! Get your tuchus over to the ToughPigs forum and add in your $0.02. Or, if you're camera shy, you can send an e-mail to yours truly at joe.toughpigs@gmail.com.

Image courtesy of ToughPigs' own Brad!

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Tuesday, February 5, 2008

 

Who will be Jim?: A Contest


by Joe Hennes


According to the internets, it's official (or would that make it "e-fficial"?): there is a Jim Henson biopic in the works. The movie will be about Jim's life, successes, tribulations, and maybe some puppets. That is, if the Jim Henson Company, Disney, and Sesame Workshop can all allow the puppets to be in the film. Or else we might be getting two hours of a tall guy with a beard with nothing on his hands.

But the question remains: who out there can fill the shoes of the man behind the frog? I mean, other than this guy. Head on over to the ToughPigs forum with an idea or two. Feel free to post pictures (double points for fancy Photoshopping), and we'll post the results here on ToughPigs.com next week.

Prizes for the best choices will include bragging rights and a walk-on role in the upcoming Frazzle documentary.

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Thursday, January 17, 2008

 

The Easiest Muppet Trivia Quiz Ever!


by Ryan Roe

Have you ever wished you were a Muppet expert, but you don’t have time to memorize Jim Henson: The Works, pore over DVD extras, or read every page of Muppet Wiki, because you’re too busy doing things like working, cooking, and using the restroom? Of course you have! It feels great to be an expert at something!

Tough Pigs is here to help, with yet another valuable public service! It’s the Easiest Muppet Trivia Quiz Ever, and by the time you’re finished, you will feel like a true Muppet geek, guaranteed, or we’ll give you your money back. Heck, we’ll give you twice your money back! Now break out your No. 2 pencils and your thinking caps, and away we go!

1. As the story goes, Jim Henson made the first Kermit the Frog puppet out of…
a) His mother’s green spring coat
b) a bowling ball
c) the skins of 11 ½ real frogs
d) a Sababa Kermit doll


2. The first TV show starring the Muppets was a local Washington, D.C. program that debuted in 1955. What was it called?
a) Sam & Friends
b) Sam & Casual Acquaintances
c) Sam & People Who Hate His Guts
d) Shasta McNasty


3. The Muppet characters Jim Henson created for a series of Wilkins Coffee commercials were called…
a) Wilkins and Wontkins
b) A Drunk Old Man and Another Drunk Old Man
c) Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin
d) Dwight D. Eisenhower and Richard Milhous Nixon


4. Where did Jim Henson meet Frank Oz?
a) At a puppetry festival
b) At a cocktail party – they both showed up wearing the same dress, had a good laugh about it and became fast friends
c) At karate lessons
d) In prison


5. Rowlf the Dog first rose to national television fame on what 1960s variety show?
a) The Jimmy Dean Show, in regular appearances alongside Jimmy Dean
b) The Fugitive, as the one-armed man who killed Richard Kimble's wife
c) Laugh-In, as a miniskirt-clad background go-go dancer
d) CBS Evening News, as the anchor


6. Who has been Big Bird’s primary performer since Sesame Street premiered in 1969?

a) Caroll Spinney
b) Carol Channing
c) Cookie Monster
d) Nobody; he’s a real, live 8’ bird


7. What was unusual about the Gorch Muppets featured on the first season of Saturday Night Live in 1975?
a) They had lifelike taxidermist’s eyes
b) They had outie belly buttons
c) They were all gay
d) They were performed not by Muppeteers, but by dentists


8. Who financed the production of The Muppet Show?
a) Lord Lew Grade, a British television entrepeneur
b) Lord Lew Zealand, Boomerang Fish Thrower of the British Empire
c) The Lord of the Dance
d) Your mom!


9. The Great Muppet Caper’s “Couldn’t We Ride” musical number, a tour de force of puppet wizardry, features the Muppets doing what?
a) Riding bicycles while singing
b) Sleeping
c) Silently staring at the camera
d) Wearing socks with sandals


10. The 1984 film The Muppets Take Manhattan includes the debut of what group of characters, who would later star in their own Saturday morning cartoon?
a) the Muppet Babies
b) the Golden Girls
c) the Opera-Singing Zookeepers
d) the Horrible, Foul-Smelling, Foul-Mouthed Cannibals


11. What was Jim Henson’s pitch to his creative team for Fraggle Rock?
a) “I want to create a show that will bring about world peace”
b) “I want to create a romantic comedy for arsonists”
c) “I want a do a hard-boiled crime drama set in a castle made of pink cotton candy”
d) “MTV cops”


12. What happened to Mr. Snuffleupagus on Sesame Street in 1986?
a) The grown-ups on the street saw him for the first time
b) He married Maria
c) He made the Statue of Liberty disappear
d) He shot Larry Hagman


13. Jim Henson’s hour-long 1989 variety/anthology show was called…
a) The Jim Henson Hour
b) The Vicki and Leon Show
c) Lots and Lots of Really Scary Buckets of Blood
d) Howie Hayseed & Yancy Yokel's Country & Western Jamboree






14. Who took over Kermit the Frog after Jim Henson’s passing in 1990?
a) Muppet performer Steve Whitmire
b) Lawyer Alan Dershowitz
c) Cosby Show star Lisa Bonet
d) Vice president Dan Quayle


15. The 1992 Muppet film The Muppet Christmas Carol, set in Dickensian England, was based on what book?
a) A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
b) Babysitters Club Mysteries #7: The Case of the Vanishing Training Bra
c) Latawnya, the Naughty Horse, Learns to Say "No" to Drugs
d) A Muppet Christmas Carol: The Storybook of the Movie Based on the Book A Christmas Carol Which Was Written by Charles Dickens


16. Complete this lyric from the theme song of the 1996 Muppet series Muppets Tonight: “Here come the Muppets, here come the Muppets, here come…”
a) “…the Muppets tonight!”
b) “…the cops! Everyone hide!”
c) “…the Chickens of Death! Run for your life!”
d) Avril Lavigne


17. Where did MuppetFest, 2001’s official Muppet fan convention, take place?
a) Santa Monica, California
b) Ganymede, the seventh moon of Jupiter
c) A castle made of pink cotton candy
d) In the forest, but no one was around, so it didn’t make a noise


18. What was the biggest Muppet news story of 2004?
a) Disney bought the Muppets
b) Zoot was elected president, narrowly beating the incumbent Hush Puppy
c) The Swedish Chef was named Super Bowl MVP after taking the Green Bay Packers to a 343-7 victory over the Harlem Globetrotters
d) Elvis Presley came back from the dead to perform one of the Muppet Elvises for a charity concert, then died again

Well? You got every single question right, didn’t you? See, I told you you’d feel like an expert. Just to make sure, here’s…

How to calculate your score: Give yourself 10,000 points for each time you chose answer “a” on a question. For each time you chose any other letter, smack yourself in the face as forcefully as possible.

Click here to discuss this article and compare scores on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Wednesday, October 31, 2007

 

Halloween Parade 2007!


by Joe Hennes


The tree is lit, the mistletoe is hung, and there's a fat man on the roof. That must mean it's everyone's favorite excuse to eat eggs and throw chocolate (or the other way around): Halloween! It's the time of year when everyone reaches deep into their psyche and pulls out a costume idea that will set the world ablaze. Or at the very least will get your drunken photos onto TMZ.

This year, many people decided to mock what you and I hold most dear by dressing up as their favorite, or least favorite, Muppet characters. Let's take a peek at some of the best and most embarrassing hilarious pictures that I stole from Flickr, shan't we?
Here we've got a couple of giant-headed roommates, Bert and Ernie. C'mon guys, you couldn't find some stripey shirts?
Two extracool points go to this Two-Headed Monster for remembering that the one on the left has horns that go up, while the one on the right has horns that go down.
Boy, that Cookie Monster costume looks warm, doesn't it? I guess Big Bird wouldn't know, since he can't see a damn thing.
Ignore the wolf-in-grandma's-gown, take note of the Swedish Chef. I give an extra point for the bow tie, but I'll take it away again for thinking he has a goatee.
Golden teeth and golden tones (and a few feather boas) make this costume extra nifty.
This Doozer costumes looks more like a chubby construction worker. The confused look on his face make him look like a construction worker who lost his favorite wrench.
I can imagine that a Gonzo costume is near impossible to pull off, so I'll give points for the purple tux, as well as convincing his girlfriend to go as Camilla.
Guess what Elmo's thinking about today? That's right, Elmo! Let's ask a baby what Elmo looks like. Hey baby...
A very strange attempt at a Jim Henson costume. I guess the gray beard means this is 1989 Jim Henson, though I don't understand the Kermit puppet with his neck on fire. Though I really don't get the lady next to him. I'm afraid to ask.
This Pepe costume might be my favorite of the bunch. She's got the extra arms (and the strings to make them work), the blue hoodie, and the spiky hair to simulate antennae. 100 Muppet points to you, King Prawn!
Sweetums in da house! This is one really well-made costume. I want to buy one, then run around town with a suitcase, shouting "Wait up, you guys! I wanna go to Hollywood!"
Statler and Waldorf here get my approval for actually being two old guys. Oh, and the portable balcony doesn't hurt either.
Halloween? Uh huh, uh huh. Book! Book book book. Yip yip yip.

Now let's take a look at some repeated costumes I found. Then we can compare and thrown toilet paper over the house of the loser.
Red Fraggle showed up at a couple of parties. Both Reds have the red shirt/yellow face combo, but only one managed to grow pom-poms on her head. Oh, all for the sake of Halloween!
No Halloween is complete without a few Kermit the Frog impersonators. Kermit #1 gets cool points for bringing his own banjo, though Kermit #2 gets supercool points for actually making her costume out of a green jacket. Nice historical reference, and I'm sure it was completely intentional.
This one's a no brainer. Oscar #3 wins by default for having a trash can without two gangly legs sticking out from the bottom.
And here we've got three sets of Kermits and Piggys. The first pair obviously put a lot of effort into their costumes, while couple #2 looks more bored than if they were watching the Muppet Treasure Island Sing-Along. Of course, the brilliant pairing of a child and a dog makes us all forget that the first two ever existed.
And let's finish up with some group shots. In the first picture, I really enjoy the Yip-Yip Martians, as well as the brave attempt at the Two-Headed Monster. Super Grover and Guy Smiley are neat, but the icing on the cake is... Farley? No, Sherlock Hemlock. No, Green Anything Muppet. Yeah, that's it.
I like the mix of giant heads and real people in this one. Kermit and Piggy are completely awkward, but they look great alongside Lew Zealand, Bunsen and Beaker, and most of the Electric Mayhem. Take note of the failed attempt at Scooter in the back there.
Lastly, a traditional family picture, which I think is way too adorable for words. The hand-made Oscar does it for me, though I doubt he'd much enjoy living in a Rubbermade can.

That's all for this year! Happy tricking and happy treating! Save a Mars Bar for me.

Click here to dress up like a frog on the ToughPigs forum!

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Thursday, October 11, 2007

 

Making Sense of Muppets


by Joe Hennes


Most people, both Muppet fans and otherwise, have access to their five basic senses. Seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling, touching. That's five. Count 'em yourself if you don't believe me. But there is a sixth sense which Muppet fans have and all other mundies yearn for. I call this sense, The Sixth Sense. Catchy, no?

Now you may be asking yourself, "What is this Sixth Sense? And how do I know if I have it? And how are my thoughts being projected into a Muppet blog?" These are all valid questions, though we'll only have time for the first two.

Before we delve into the fascinating world of heightened senses, let's take a look at the original five. See what I did there? We're taking a look! That's one of the senses! I'm so clever.

The truth is, a Muppet fan's perspective on almost all things is different from the rest of the world. For example, a Muppet fan does not see things. A Muppet fan chooses a set of eyes from a drawer to go with his or her character for the day. Also acceptable options are a hat that covers the eyes or a pair of glasses with no eyeballs.

Much like Howie Mandel, Muppet fans don't talk about touching. We talk about our feelings. Nothing more than feelings.

Our sense of smell is another thing entirely. All Muppet fans know that not everyone has a nose. And yet, some people have noses in abundance. Then, there's the lucky few with detachable noses (for narrow garages).

All Muppet fans know that one does not necessarily need ears to be able to hear. This is especially true if one is a frog, a monster, a grouch, a dinger, a snuffleupagus, a fraggle, a chicken, a musician, or a boomerang fish thrower.

And there's little that Muppet fans are more familiar with than bad taste.

For those of you who are skimming this article, here is a visual representation of the first five senses, according to a Muppet fan.

As for The Sixth Sense, it is the ability to sense Muppets wherever they are. Confused? Rightfully so. A Muppet fan with this talent can look down the aisle of a toy store and immediately spot the lone Grover toy on the shelf. This person can open a book and his or her eyes will be immediately drawn to the word "Henson." This person can skim through a magazine and stop on the ad for Fraggle Rock DVDs. The sensation is automatic and unconscious, and it comes in handy when browsing for used Sesame Street books.

But how, I say, how do you check to see if you have this superpower? I have set up a series of tests so you can deduce whether or not you possess The Sixth Sense.

First, scan the article below. Do NOT read it, but scan it with your eyes. See if you can spot the Muppet references quickly.

Once upon a time, there was a guy named Jim Hanson. Hanson loved muffins, and he loved puppets. Muffins and puppets, puppets and muffins. He wasn't too keen on frog juggling. No sir, there was no frog jugglers to be had. Sometimes he would indulge in sesame seeds. Maybe sesame seeds on his muffin. Maybe he'd juggle sesame muffins. But probably not. Or maybe his friend Karmin would juggle Hanson's sesame muffins. So, to recap, puppet-fan Hanson's sesame muffins will be frog-juggled by Karmin. Henson's fraggle sesame street kermit muppets with fries. Juggling sesame muffins by Karmin for puppet Hanson. Hanson puppets juggle frogs for Karmin's sesame muffins. The gray squirrel eats acorns at midnight.

Did you catch the Muppet references? How long did it take you? That long, huh? Well, maybe you'll have more luck with the next test.

In this test, there are 100 images. Hidden in the faces are 10 Muppets. See how fast you can spot them all! Well? What are you doing still reading this? Go find Muppets!!
Did you find all ten? Hooray! Now for the final part of the test. Blindfold yourself and go to your local toy store. Wait, maybe you should blindfold yourself after driving to the toy store. Now, ask the elderly toy store employee to lead you to the preschool toy aisle. As fast as you can, rip off your blindfold and purchase at least $50 worth of Sesame Street merchandise. I would suggest the TMX Cookie Monster and anything with that adorable Abby Cadabby on it. Then run it back home and mail them to: Joe, c/o ToughPigs.com, Anytown, USA.

Did you do it? Well then congratulations, you just confirmed that you indeed have The Sixth Sense! Please be advised, you must follow the sacred code that goes along with having The Sixth Sense. You must never use your powers for evil. If the need arises, you may don tights and a cape to fight crime, but only if there isn't already a Superman knockoff in your hometown. And lastly, be excellent to each other.
Click here to smell this article on the ToughPigs forum!

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Wednesday, September 19, 2007

 

NicheMuppet, Part Two


by Ryan Roe

This is part two of two of NicheMuppet. Click here to read part one! And now, some more made-up Muppets.

Skinny Blue, created by Quinn R
Target audience: Celebrities

Quinn says: "Skinny Blue" is a Paparazzi weasel who's new to Sesame Street. The paparazzi realized that Sesame Street was a magnet for celebrities, and sent this blue-furred cretin to get some exclusive pictures. Somehow he became convinced that Oscar was related to the Academy Awards, and won't leave him alone. With all the spoiled starlets out there, I figured that Sesame Street needs to make them feel like paparazzi are okay and misunderstood, much like Count von Count and Cookie Monster did for vampires and googly-eyed beasts.

Upside-Down Steve, created by Joe H
Target audience: Kids who walk on their hands

Joe says: You know what kids really love? Walking on their hands! You know what they love even more? Muppets who walk on their hands! Upside-down Steve has been walking on his hands for so long, he has forgotten how to walk upright. Oh, that crazy Steve! Most of his storylines involve looking for his missing shoe, which is ironic since he has no need for shoes.

Sister Mary Monster, created by Michal R
Target audience: Viewers seeking wholesomeness
Michal says: If you've taken part in the recent clamoring for a return to family values on television, we'd like to direct your full attention to Sister Mary Monster. Mary occasionally stops in at Hooper's for a nice, tall glass of milk, but generally tends to mind her own business unless someone needs something to count. She doesn't drink, she doesn't smoke, she doesn't swear, and she doesn't engage in premarital sex. Or sex of any sort. Which, considering that she's a Muppet, should be a given, but a surprising number of viewers consider this guarantee extremely valuable.

Reggie Monster, created by Leighanne M
Target audience: Sticklers

Leighanne says: Meet Reggie the Monster, who loves rules & regulations and makes his living updating them to suit the modern stickler. One of his favorite topics is food safety regulations, and he's lobbying hard to get the Five Second Rule legally amended to .05 seconds for barber shops.

Artie, created by Kyle W
Target audience: Artists


Kyle says: Artie is a full body Muppet character with brownish fur. He loves to draw and paint. He moved to Sesame Street from Paris, and he wears a striped white and red shirt and a beret. He's a little older than Big Bird, and has always wanted to be a famous artist. He's fun but also doesn't like criticism. Artie is fond of Baby Bear, who loves to draw with him. They both enjoy having fun with Hero Guy, and Artie really enjoys living on Sesame Street.

Naked Nate, created by Ryan R
Target audience: Nudists

Ryan says: Although characters like Big Bird and Snuffy never wear clothes, Nate will be the first humanoid Muppet to go au naturale. He just prefers to be nude, that's all. Like most Sesame Street Muppets, Nate is normally only seen from the waist up, so there’s no need for concern over indecent exposure. But if the script ever calls for a wide shot, Nate’s unmentionable areas can simply be blocked out with a black censoring bar, which may be adorned with the number or letter of the day. Nate loves grabbing lunch at Hooper’s Store, but he’s run up a massive tab because he never has any cash on him, due to the fact that a naked dude has no pockets.

Unseen Muppet, created by Quinn R
Target audience: Agoraphobes

Quinn says: This Muppet is really just a pair of eyes up in a window on Sesame Street--an agoraphobe who would like to be out playing with Elmo, Big Bird, and others, but can't bring himself to come out of his apartment and interact with them. Sometimes we catch a glimpse of him, but he's usually just out of sight. This will send a message of some kind to the agoraphobic children of the U.S. that yes, they have a problem, but there are millions of others out there just like them. In their apartments.

Milkie, created by Joe H
Target audience:
POG collectors

Joe: The year is 1992 and POGs are all the rage! Every kid in America had to collect as many as they could and bury their friends in the fiercest of competitions. There was no badge more honorable than that of your favorite pop culture characters and actors on small circular bits of cardboard. So Sesame Workshop created a Muppet to cater to POG-loving kids. Unfortunately, Milkie debuted in the fall of 1999, long after the death of both the POG fad and the retro-POG fad. Milkie is currently living out her days at the Muppet Workshop, keeping a wobbly desk stable.

Guitar Hero Guy, created by Michal R
Target audience: Guitar Hero experts

Michal says: For the all the Guitar Hero addicts out there who would watch Sesame Street, if only they could wrench their fingers away from their consoles long enough to change the channel, Guitar Hero Guy is not necessarily eager to be your friend, unless you’ve brought your own controller. Muppets and humans alike from the Sesame gang periodically approach this enigmatic little animated fellow, hoping to cajole him into singing the Alphabet Song or even to eat lunch, only to be rebuffed with remarks usually lost under the deafening strains of a Van Halen cover.

Connie, created by Leighanne M
Target audience: Muppet performers

Leighanne says: Here’s Connie, who’s more tailored to a certain demographic of Muppeteers than viewers: those darlin’ performers must get awfully tired some days, so Connie’s here for the good folks who just need to lie down and work their Muppet magic from a prone position..

Maxwell P. Stache, created by Ryan R
Target audience: Children with moustaches

Ryan: Kids these days are growing up faster than ever, and that means more and more of them have moustaches. Maxwell allows the Sesame writers to cover topics such as moustache-growing, moustache-grooming, and moustache-having. And through the marvels of modern puppet wizardry, Maxwell’s moustache can actually move. Look for “Moustache-Dancin’ Maxwell” to be the next massively successful, must-have toy craze. And depending on what market research reveals, the show could introduce a sister for Maxwell, to appeal to all those little girls out there with beards.


And that wraps it up. Thanks to everyone who submitted characters!

Click here to comment on this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Monday, September 17, 2007

 

NicheMuppet: Part One


by Ryan Roe


How many under-served demographic groups could there possibly be in the potential Sesame Street viewing audience? Based on the data we now have available to us here at Tough Pigs, my informed, scientific answer is: a whole bunch. I asked for ideas for new Sesame Muppets designed to reach very specific sections of the TV audience (kinda like how Abby Cadabby was calculated to appeal to little girls), and I got some doozies. If Sesame Workshop wants to stay relevant in this age of narrowcasting, they should snap up the rights to each and every one of these characters.

Now let’s see what you came up with. This is part one of two; part two can be found here.

Minesweeper Grouch, created by Joe H
Target audience:
Minesweeper addicts


Joe says: 85% of all kids today learn their 123s from Minesweeper. It's a fact. So why not make a lovable Sesame character for them? The Minesweeper Grouch is Oscar's Ukrainian comrade who, under cover of night, plants flags and question marks where he thinks numbers might be buried. His motivation is unknown, but the residents of Sesame Street feel safer knowing they won't be blown up by a mine when they go outside.

Zefrem, created by Quinn R
Target audience: Polygamists

Quinn says: Zefrem the Polygamist Rabbit and his wives are recent move-ins to Sesame Street. They've lived on a remote compound for most of their lives, and are enthralled at all the big city has to offer. There are thousands of polygamist children in the United States, and finally getting a "plig" Muppet on Sesame Street would be a real coup. They make fast friends with The Count, who's delighted at the many different ways the rabbits can breed. And inbreed.

I-Can-Sing-All-of-Rent-Monster, created by Michal R
Target audience: Rock musical devotees

Michal says: Can you sing all of Rent? Of course not; you’ve got better things to memorize, like the complete works of Gertrude Stein. But without thinking too hard, you can probably come up with half a dozen friends who, when reminded of a single lyric from the much-ballyhooed rock opera, proceed to sing straight through to the show’s end without hesitation. Who’s to stop these suggestible souls from similarly devoting themselves to Sesame Street? Enter I-Can-Sing-All-of-Rent-Monster, a charming gal with an enchanting laugh, a lilting singing voice, and the most visually arresting pair of pants this side of Fourteenth Street. You won’t be able to turn away. No one will.

The Irographs, created by Leighanne M
Target audience: Chart lovers


Leighanne says: This illustration has been brought to you today by the Irographs: Malleable little Muppets aimed at people who enjoy both (a) irony and (b) charts. Here they’re representing the different kinds of pies that people like, only they’re not doing it as a pie chart.

Monster Muppet Fan, created by Chris S
Target audience: Muppet geeks

Chris says: A huge fan of all the non-human characters that populate Sesame Street, Monster Muppet Fan is known to sit at his computer for hours at a time looking up every minute detail of his fellow Muppets’ lives. When he does leave his room, it's usually to follow his furry friends around, take notes on what they're up to or plans they are making, and then go home to post all about it his blog: "The Monster Muppet Fan Site".

He is also known to carry around his trusty video and still cameras to catch his friends in the act of not sharing, messing up the alphabet, or
forgetting their numbers and then posting the incriminating evidence on TMZ.com. Because of this, he is sometimes referred as "Paparazzo Monster".
The only other reason Monster Muppet Fan will venture outdoors is to pick up the latest merchandise based on his Muppet friends, have them autograph it, then display his new found possessions in his room for the world (AKA him) to see.

Accessories: Video camera, Still Photography camera with wide angle zoom lens, Computer with high speed internet connection, specially configured laptop with harness to walk and blog at the same time, thick horned rimmed glass.

Appearance: Sometimes mistaken for Harvey Monster.

Cigarilla, created by Ryan R
Target audience: Cigar smokers

Ryan says: Not once in the history of Sesame Street has there been a Muppet who smoked cigars. Now there's Cigarilla, a cheroot-puffing gorilla who will finally fill that void and bring in all the formerly estranged smokers in TV-viewer land. His educational potential is considerable – he can build triangles, squares and rectangles out of cigars, he can teach the letter S (for stogie, smoke and stench), and kids will have lots of fun counting his hacking coughs. Unfortunately, we'll never know what kind of chemistry he might have with other characters, because none of the other Muppets can stand to be around him.

Tanner Monster, created by Anthony S
Target audience: 7th graders

(Tanner was absent on picture day)

Anthony says: This Muppet is enthusiastic and friendly, but his ever-changing body keeps him from being as outgoing as he'd like. He can often be found counting the new hairs under his arms. Rosita makes him feel strange, and he doesn't know why. Ideally he would be played by John Tartaglia.

Tuna Salad, created by Joe H
Target audience: Picky eaters

Joe says: The Tuna Salad Muppet is for kids who aren't big fans of their regular fruits and veggies. Sure, there have always been Muppet characters like Broccoli, Scallions, Tomatoes, Apples, Grapes, and the like. But as the first Muppet to represent fish, celery, and mayonnaise all in one character, more kids will be chowing down on this deli-friendly snack in no time!

Benjamin Beaver, created by Quinn R
Target audience: (see below)

Quinn says: Benjamin Beaver's mother has Baron von Munchhausen Syndrome, so she makes lots of trips to Gina's veterinarian clinic. She doesn't ever really need to make them, but she's sure that Benjamin is sick, and she needs the attention herself. Benjamin likes Gina's office, and even though he doesn't start out sick, he usually ends up with a case of chicken pox or bird flu by the time he leaves.

Gus the Amicable Zombie, created by Michal R
Target audience: Zombies

Michal says: I can’t tell you how many times a member of the undead community has approached me on the street and said, unprovoked, “Gosh, Michal, I’d love to become a regular Sesame Street viewer, and perhaps even contribute vast sums of the fortune left to me by my late self to the public broadcasting cause, but I just feel so… so alienated. We’re talking about a show that regularly features monsters, a mammoth-like creature who can turn invisible, and an abominable giant bird. My goodness, they’ve even got a vampire with a daily segment – and yet the zombie population has never even merited a walk-on spot. I’ve never felt so insulted in all my undead life.”

Won’t someone think of the zombies? Won’t someone PLEASE THINK OF THE ZOMBIES?


That's it for part one, but click here to read part two! Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Wednesday, September 5, 2007

 

NicheMuppet: Extension!


by Ryan Roe

This just in! The deadline for NicheMuppet has been extended to Wednesday, September 12! NicheMuppet is the reader participation thingy where you come up with a new Sesame Street Muppet designed to appeal to a very specific demographic, be it a Muppet with a particular job or hobby or whatever.

If you need inspiration, consider Leo the Party Monster, a Sesame character who actually existed. All he cared about was partying, so he was destined to be a big hit with all the rave-goers in the audience. Except that the ravers probably stayed up late, which meant they couldn't get up to watch Sesame Street in the morning, which is probably why Leo the Party Monster didn't stick around very long.

But you get the idea. Send a description of your character, and a picture (if you feel artistically inclined), to me at ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com. Get it to me by September 12, then look for the best ones to be posted right here on ToughPigs.com. Don't be a procrastinating Muppet! Send your submission today!

Click here to rave about this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

 

NicheMuppet: A Reminder


by Ryan Roe

Hey, everyone. Have you been enjoying the new season of Sesame Street? More importantly, have you sent me your NicheMuppet submission?

You can see this earlier post for the details, but basically, NicheMuppet is inspired by Abby Cadabby, the rising star on Sesame Street who was designed to appeal to little girls, and it's where you come up with a new Sesame Street Muppet calculated to reach a specific demographic, and send me a description (and a picture, if you're so inclined.) It could be a retired Air Force Muppet, a bobsled racing Muppet, or whatever, as long as it speaks to a particular segment of the potential audience.

Send your new character ideas to me at ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com. The deadline is September 5. Now if you'll excuse me, Abby is about to turn me into a pumpkin.

Click here to share your excitement about this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Monday, August 20, 2007

 

24 Reasons to Watch Season 2


by Joe Hennes

The second season of The Muppet Show has now officially been out on the market for about two weeks. And if you're a decent sort of Muppet fan, you'll have already watched it several times, nitpicked it to death, and cried over all of the scenes with Miss Mousey.

But if you haven't watched the second season yet, you are in luck. I have gone through the trouble of picking out the very best scenes from every episode and prepared them in an easy-to-read format for your enjoyment.

So without further ado-doo-do-do-doo, here are 24 spectacular scenes and riveting reasons to watch The Muppet Show: Season Two.

Episode 1 - Don Knotts

The many faces of Don Knotts!

Episode 2 - Zero Mostel

There is nothing in the world more satisfying than Zero Mostel trying to murder Sam the Eagle with a hammer. Except maybe when he points his gun at Sam, then points it into his own mouth when Sam turns around, while Sam hardly flinches.

Episode 3 - Milton Berle

MAKEUP!

Episode 4 - Rich Little

It's comforting to know that world-famous impersonator Rich Little crashes and burns when he attempts to do the voices of Fozzie, Kermit and Piggy.

It's more comforting to know that Mark Hamill can do a better job at it.

Episode 5 - Judy Collins

Judy Collins' strung-out performance. Note her muffled bewilderment at Crazy Harry's explosion and the sincerity with which she sings a ballad in front of three incredibly creepy clowns.

Episode 6 - Nancy Walker

The biting honesty when Nancy Walker admits to Fozzie that the show is a flop, right after picking up his spirits with a jaunty song. It's like I'm watching an episode of "Rhoda"!

Episode 7 - Edgar Bergen

Charlie McCarthy does nothing but insult the Muppets in any way he can muster, only to be asked to join their motley clan. And how does he thank them? More insults! Thanks, you wooden jackass.

Episode 8 - Steve Martin

Richard Hunt's laugh. Go ahead, try not to think about it. You can't.

Episode 9 - Madeline Kahn

Because Madeline Kahn was once the sexiest, most talented women in entertainment.

Episode 10 - George Burns

Didn't want to dooo ittt...

Episode 11 - Dom DeLuise

Because where else will you find a sci-fi Dom DeLuise playing whack-a-mole with Merdlidops? Other than that one episode of "Studio 60", I mean.

Episode 12 - Bernadette Peters

Because all you really need is for Gloat, Miss Mousey, and Droop to believe in you.

Episode 13 - Rudolph Nureyev

Because Sam the Eagle spends a half hour convincing the Muppets to wear tuxedos, only to feel insulted when Rudolph Nureyev wears one.

Episode 14 - Elton John

Two words: shag carpet.

Episode 15 - Lou Rawls

Because no other show has a blurry Lou Rawls as a guest star.

Episode 16 - Cleo Laine

Because you can pinpoint the exact moment when Cleo Laine's career ended. Here's a two-word hint: Bruce Schwartz.

*EDITED to say that according to ToughPigs contributor David, despite Bruce Schwartz's best efforts, Cleo Laine's career apparently is alive and well. You can read all about it here.

Episode 17 - Julie Andrews

Because Julie Andrews owns a cow.

Episode 18 - Jaye P. Morgan

Because at one point, Jaye P. Morgan's head gets caught on fire.
And then she imitates Dr. Teeth's mouth-open-and-head-nodding-thing-that-Muppets-do-after-a-song-thing.

Episode 19 - Peter Sellers

Because it's the only Muppet Show episode that can possibly get away with a Nazi-esque character.

Episode 20 - Petula Clark

Shameless promotion.

Episode 21 - Bob Hope

Because I been through the desert on a horse with no knees...

Episode 22 - Teresa Brewer

Because Teresa Brewer is a fatty fatty boom batty. Lookit all those treats!

Episode 23 - John Cleese

Because the pirate sketch is the best non-Monty Python sketch ever performed by 1/6 of the troupe.

Episode 24 - Cloris Leachman

Because Cloris Leachman gets booed in the first 15 seconds of the show. By a bunch of vegetables.

And there you have it, folks. 24 episodes, 24 great reasons to buy season 2 on DVD. And if that ain't enough, maybe you should try the H.R. Pufinstuf fan site.

Click here to discuss awkward guest stars and animated gifs on the ToughPigs forum!

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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

 

NicheMuppet: A Call for Entries


by Ryan Roe

The new season of Sesame Street (its 38th! Holy cow!) started on Monday, and it's as great and hilarious and star-studded as ever. Oh, and educational. It's that too. Word has it that every episode this season will include some kind of appearance by Abby Cadabby, the funny fairy with the poofy pom-pom pigtails. When Abby debuted last year, we heard a lot about how she was very carefully designed to appeal to little girls.

Now, it makes sense for a children's show to create a character aimed at little girls, because that's half their audience (not counting the grown-up nerds who still watch the show, like you and me). But it got me to thinking... what if Sesame Street wanted to target other demographics? More... niche-y demographics?

That's where you, the readers of Tough Pigs, come in. I want to hear your concepts for a brand-new Sesame Street Muppet calculated to appeal to a certain set of viewers. What if the show wanted to reach the stamp collectors in the audience? They could introduce a Muppet named Posty, who's covered in stamps, or who goes around sticking stamps on everyone. Or what if they wanted to grab the attention of the extreme sports crowd? They could bring in Gnarly Monster, who's obsessed with bungee-jumping off the roof of 123 Sesame St. or skydiving onto Hooper's Store.

Those are terrible examples, so you'll have to come up with a better one. Write up a description of YOUR idea for a new character -- their name, physical appearance, and who they're designed for -- and send it to me at ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com. If you're feeling especially ambitious, you could include a drawing of your new Muppet... and if I like it, I'll post it here on the site. I reckon three weeks is a reasonable amount of time to get the job done, so look for the submissions to be posted here on or around September 6. I'll post a reminder or two in the interim, in case you're in the "forgetful" demographic. (By the way, that group already had its own Muppet representative.)

So what are you waiting for? The fly-fishing enthusiasts of the world need a Muppet that speaks to them! Send your submission to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com today!

Click here if you can think of anything to say about this article on the Tough Pigs forum.

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Sunday, July 22, 2007

 

Muppet Show Season 2: Poll Dancing


by Joe Hennes


With just over 2 weeks until the second season of The Muppet Show finally graces us with its presence, all of our internal timers have begun their ultimate countdowns here at ToughPigs.com. There has been a couple of early reviews popping up around the interweb and the news sounds good. But we would like to know what you're most excited about.

Is it The Muppet Valentine Show? Or how about the fact that Disney managed to get all of the episodes out without any unnecessary edits? I'm guessing it's the new Muppets on Puppets featurette. Yeah, definitely that. Or the ever-elusive Teresa Brewer episode. Yep, one of those two. Oh wait, I know, I know. You're a Weezer fanatic, so you're excited about their "Keep Fishin'" music video. Oh, what college has done to you!

Then again, you've been thinking about these titillating extras for months now. Perhaps you're more concerned about the features that didn't make it onto the new DVDs. What could those features be?

There's a very good chance you're missing the [sic] and twisted Muppet Morsels. Or maybe you had your hopes up for some straight-up commentary. Better yet, some interviews with the Muppeteers and writing staff. Or perhaps you're feeling jilted at the prospect of the Weezer music video without the accompanying making-of documentary that aired on MTV2. As for me, I'm quite upset at the gaping hole that is the Kermit-Gonzo-Animal Skateboarding picture. No Muppet production is complete without it. Or maybe you're upset that the Steve Martin episode has been completely cut. Just kidding.

So be a dear and head on over to the ToughPigs forum where you can cast your vote for stuff that doesn't exist and for stuff that will exist on August 7.

Click here and here to take the poll and the other poll on the ToughPigs forum!

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Friday, July 20, 2007

 

My Favorite Muppet of the Day: Day Five


by Ryan Roe

Welcome once again to My Favorite Muppet of the Day, as we wrap up a week-long examination of whoever my favorite Muppet happens to be on any particular day. Who’s going to make the cut today? There sure are a lot of Muppets to choose from, and today’s the last day of the week, so I’d better pick a good one. That’s why I’m going to go with… Taminella Grinderfall from Tales of the Tinkerdee!

Wait, no. Is Taminella a good choice? She’s pretty obscure. Okay, okay… I choose Angel Marie from Muppet Treasure Island and The Muppets’ Wizard of Oz! No, wait – that’s an even worse choice. I mean, in Oz he had a tickling fetish, for crying out loud. So instead, my favorite is Pip. No – Pop! No – Roosevelt Franklin! Rugby Tiger! Mopatop! Waffle the Cow Monkey!

Dang, this is stressful. I need a favorite Muppet who’s laid back… a favorite Muppet who’s cool as a fuzzy cucumber. I think there’s one obvious choice, so that’s the direction I’ll go. My favorite Muppet today is Floyd.

Much has been written about how the Muppets are quietly subversive, and I can think of no better representative of this than Sergeant Floyd Pepper, bass player for the Electric Mayhem and all-around groovy cat. He doesn’t give off the obvious burnt-out hippie vibe of Zoot, but you can still tell Floyd has been around and seen a lot of crazy things in his life as a musician (heck, he’s seen Gonzo. That’s a pretty crazy thing right there.) Floyd goes along with all the madness that comes with being a Muppet, but you can always tell he knows he’s cooler than everyone around him.

How cool is Floyd? In the Kaye Ballard episode of The Muppet Show, he leads the band in a walkout because the show’s theme song is just too square. How cool is Floyd? He managed to hook up with Janice, who is one of approximately two female characters on the show. How cool is Floyd? Since The Muppet Show, he hasn’t had much to do because all the Muppet writers know they’re just not cool enough to write for him.

Floyd is performed by Jerry Nelson, which means he’s the best singer of the Electric Mayhem, although that’s not so difficult an honor to achieve when your bandmates include Animal and Zoot. On The Muppet Show, Floyd sang classics like “Ain’t Misbehavin’” and contemporary hits like “New York State of Mind,” and was equally at ease with both. It’s almost impossible to do a Beatles cover that’s as good as the original, but Floyd pulled it off with his soulful rendition of “While My Guitar Gently Weeps.”

Floyd’s voice is cool. His way of speaking is cool (“We are, am, is and be, they whom are known as the Electric Mayhem!”). His hat is cool. His “hah-hah-hah” laugh is cool. In the early episodes of The Muppet Show, even his walk his cool… it’s sort of a rhythmic hipster mosey.

To summarize: Floyd is cool. He just is. And he does it all effortlessly. He never tries too hard to be cool, which makes him even cooler and which, to me, is the very essence of the Muppets at their best. And that’s why Floyd is my favorite Muppet today.

Man, this week has been fun, but there are still so many more Muppets, and so many more days. I might just have to do this again sometime. So, who’s your favorite Muppet today? Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum and tell the world! And click these links for part one, part two, part three, and part four to see who my favorite Muppets were earlier this week!

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Thursday, July 19, 2007

 

My Favorite Muppet of the Day: Day Four


by Ryan Roe

Welcome back to My Favorite Muppet of the Day, a series of articles in which I tell you who my favorite Muppet is today. Let’s see… On Monday my favorite was a Muppet Show character, on Tuesday it was a minor character from Sesame Street and The Muppet Show, and yesterday my favorite was a Sesame Street character. Today I think I’m in a Fraggle Rock mood. So today, my favorite Muppet is Junior Gorg.

In the early episodes of Fraggle Rock, the Gorgs are basically the villains. It would have been easy to make them one-dimensional bad guys, but that’s not what the show is about, so Junior quickly becomes a lovable, eager-to-please goofball. He’s always trying to catch Fraggles, but it’s never really clear whether he knows what to do with them once he captures them. Eat them? Stomp them? Steal their tiny little Fraggle credit cards? Junior’s too good-natured to do any of that.


As the series went on, the Gorgs became more developed characters, occasionally getting their own major episode stories. It would be difficult for viewers to identify with Pa and Ma Gorg, the king and queen of the universe, so Junior became the show’s central Gorg. We're sad for him when we realize that his dearest friend is a radish in “The Great Radish Caper,” we worry about him when Wander McMooch takes advantage of his naivete in “Junior Sells the Farm,” and we freak the heck out with him when he sees his mom without a head in “The Great Radish Famine.” Who would have thought a pantsless giant could be such a sympathetic character?

As much as I love Ma and Pa, I think Junior is the greatest example of the high-tech puppet sorcery that went into bringing the Gorgs to life. When I watch the show, I never doubt for a second that Junior is a living, breathing fellow, and a frigging enormous one. Have you ever noticed how much energy Richard Hunt brought to each character he performed? Junior is no exception, and Hunt’s vocal performance is perfectly matched by Rob Mills (and later Frank Meschkuleit) inside the shaggy, pleasantly plump costume. Every once in a while we get to see Junior dance, and it’s always a good time for everyone.

So, let’s see what we got here... Junior Gorg boasts an ebullient, collaborative performance, a funny, likeable personality, and… oh yeah! There’s that one episode where he traps the Fraggles in a basket, and he’s sitting on the basket, and he hears Gobo’s voice calling to him, and his eyes go really wide and he says, “My bottom is talking to me! That cracks me up every single time.

And that’s why Junior Gorg is my favorite Muppet today.

Click these links for part one, part two, part three, and part five to see who my favorite Muppets happened to be on other days. And click on these words to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!


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Wednesday, July 18, 2007

 

My Favorite Muppet of the Day: Day Three


by Ryan Roe

Oh welcome, oh welcome, to our little site
We’re ever so glad you could join us tonight

Welcome back again to My Favorite Muppet of the Day, a week-long daily ode to whoever my current favorite Muppet happens to be. Click here for part one, and click here for part two. As you've probably guessed from the introduction -- and the large picture to the right -- my favorite Muppet today is Prairie Dawn.

You know, there was much ballyhoo about the introduction of Abby Cadabby as a female Sesame Street character in 2006, and there was similar ballyhooing in 1994 when Zoe showed up. But the fact is, Prairie Dawn has been on the show since its second season, doing her thing day in and day out as many other Muppet chicks have come and gone (Are there any fans of Roxy Marie, Lulu, or Merry Monster in the house?), and she’s a perfectly good female character. I think she’s quite ballyhoo-worthy.

I totally would have played with Prairie Dawn if she had attended my preschool. You could never be bored hanging out with Prairie, because she’s the kind of kid who always has to have something going on. I’d love to be in one of her pageants… I don’t care if I have to play a tree, an egg, a nose hair, or whatever; I’d just love to be in one of her productions, which boast some pretty impressive costume design and songwriting, considering she’s just a little girl.

One of my favorite Prairie Dawn moments comes on the Sesame Street Fairy Tale Album, which I owned on vinyl during my childhood Sesame phase. The Sesame Street Muppets take turns telling stories, and when it’s Prairie’s turn, she tells a lovely story of a girl named Annabelle who befriends a dragon. The album track includes a song called “What Does a Sleeping Dragon Dream Of?” and when I listened to the record as a child, it would often soothe me right to sleep. Prairie’s story doesn’t have the comedy of Bert and Ernie’s or the passion of the Count’s. It’s just a really nice story, and she tells it well.

Which is not to say Prairie can’t be comedic or passionate. In recent years I’ve come to realize that Prairie Dawn is just about the funniest straight man ever, and it’s because her deep desire for everything to go right is a desire not shared by many other Muppets. This is especially evident in her recent “Letter of the Day” sketches with Cookie Monster, in which she goes to great lengths to prevent Cookie from eating the day’s letter, despite the foregone inevitability of it all. Nobody does exasperation quite like Prairie Dawn.

As the story goes, Fran Brill was inspired to come up with the name “Prairie Dawn” when she saw a 8x10” glossy photo in her agent’s office of an aspiring actress named Prairie Dorn. Do you think Prairie Dorn feels ticked off today because Brill built a career in puppetry on a character with her name? I’d like to think she’s proud of her namesake. Prairie Dawn is strong-willed but definitely feminine (Do any little girls in real life wear bows in their hair any more?), which makes her a great role model for girls. She’s adorable when she’s frustrated, but frustration never prevents her from seeking perfection. Plus, she’s infinity times more interesting than her döppelganger Betty Lou. And that’s why Prairie Dawn is my favorite Muppet today.

Click these links for part one, part two, part four, and part five to see who my other favorite Muppets were and will be. And click these words right here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!


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Tuesday, July 17, 2007

 

My Favorite Muppet of the Day: Day Two


by Ryan Roe

Welcome back to My Favorite Muppet of the Day, a week-long peek into my ever-changing Muppet love. Yesterday I chose a major Muppet star as my Favorite Muppet of the Day, but today I find myself drawn to a far more obscure character. As soon as I woke up this morning, I knew that my favorite Muppet of the day had to be Beautiful Day Monster. You may not recognize his name, but if you’re a Muppet fan, you’ve seen him around. This is a guy whose career has spanned from The Ed Sullivan Show to Sesame Street to The Muppet Show and beyond, which means he's a showbiz veteran with as much experience as Danny Kaye. (More, even. Danny Kaye was never on Sesame Street.)

I’ve always been fond of this crazy-lookin' monster, although for years I referred to him as “Got Anything Cheaper Monster,” after a travel agency sketch he did in the Paul Williams episode of The Muppet Show. The monster’s not very threatening in that appearance, but he can be when the situation calls for it. In an episode of The Jim Henson Hour, he was part of a roving gang of monsters who demanded money in a telethon for themselves, even going so far as to invade other TV channels to extort some cash. In the early days of Sesame Street, before Cookie Monster and Grover were established characters, he was all over the place, serving as the go-to monster. He annoyed Ernie, frightened Bert, and helped Kermit demonstrate the sound of the letter “B” (by blowing Kermit away and then bellowing at the camera, in a sketch that ensured a generation of children would grow up with a deep and intense fear of the second letter of the alphabet).

Perhaps his most striking appearance is in the sketch that gave him his name. In the “Beautiful Day” sketch, as seen on The Ed Sullivan Show, he destroys flowers, causes a rainstorm, and even shoots a chirping bird, all in an attempt to make a little girl unhappy. He’s so wicked, you can’t help but love him.

I’m a big fan of BDM’s design. The whole tall-headed, flat-faced, beak-mouthed thing is an unusual look, and I think it makes him stand out from the more generic Muppet monsters. I also love the way his mouth flaps open when he talks, which is a compliment I don't bestow on just anybody. It's been a while since we last saw him in a Muppet production, but I feel pretty confident he'll be back someday. He’s been performed by a million different puppeteers, and every performer gives him a slightly different personality, but when he’s performed well – as by Frank Oz on Sesame Street or Richard Hunt in the aforementioned “Got anything cheaper?” sketch – he’s a joy to watch. And that’s why Beautiful Day Monster is my Favorite Muppet today.

Check these links for part one, part three, part four, and part five to see who my other favorite Muppets are! And click hereabouts to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Monday, July 16, 2007

 

My Favorite Muppet of the Day: Day One


by Ryan Roe

“Who’s your favorite Muppet?”

When people ask me that – as they so often do, in chatrooms, at job interviews, at the dentist’s office – I’m never sure how to answer the question. I’ve been a Muppet fan my whole life, and there have been thousands of Muppet characters created for various productions in the three hundred and fifty years the Muppets have existed.

I’ve come to realize that I don’t have a single favorite Muppet. Instead, my favorite Muppet at any given time depends on a number of factors, including which productions I’ve watched most recently, which characters I might be personally identifying with, and what I had for lunch.

In fact, my favorite Muppet changes just about every day. If you ask me Tuesday who my favorite Muppet is, I’ll give you a different answer than I did on Monday. With that in mind, I’ve decided to post here every day this week, explaining who My Favorite Muppet of the Day is for each day.

To get things started, I’d like to take this opportunity to tell the world that my favorite Muppet today is Rowlf the Dog. Of all the Muppets, Rowlf is the one I’d most like to hang out with on a rainy Saturday. I imagine we’d play some cards, trade a few good jokes, trade a lot of bad jokes, share a nice big bowl of Kibbles ‘n’ Bits, and maybe if I asked him nicely, he’d grace me with a little tune on the piano.

Rowlf’s songs on The Muppet Show are always entertaining. One wouldn’t necessarily think that watching a puppet pretend to play the piano would be so riveting, but riveting it is. He didn’t appear backstage much on the show, due to being performed by the same dude as Kermit, but when he does it’s always a treat, and it’s just as exciting to see him doggin’ it on the big screen – most notably in The Muppet Movie’s legendary frog/dog duet “I Hope That Somethin’ Better Comes Along,” and in The Muppets Take Manhattan’s sequence spotlighting his new job working at a kennel, which I would argue is the funniest of the “Muppets find new jobs” scenes in the film. And who better than Rowlf to serve as the president of the Organization of Muppet Dogs in the “Secrets of the Muppets” episode of The Jim Henson Hour? I'd vote for him, if I were a Muppet dog. Heck, I'd vote for him for president of the United States... and because he's a dog, his term in office would last 28 years.

Rowlf has been around forever – his gig on The Jimmy Dean Show began back in 1963, when Coca-Cola cost a nickel and and an iPod cost $1.50 – and he’s a multi-talented entertainer. He can sing, he can play piano, and in “Veterinarian’s Hospital” sketches he can deliver some of the worst puns ever devised with expert timing. Rowlf the Dog is one cool cat. And that’s why Rowlf is my favorite Muppet today.

Check these links for part two, part three, part four, and part five to find out who my other favorite Muppets are! And click right about here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!


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Monday, May 28, 2007

 

The Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza! Part Two


by Ryan Roe


Welcome back to the Tough Pigs art gallery! It’s part two of the Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza (part one can be found here), and today we’ll be looking at works from the past, submitted by the artists now that they’re older and taller and can grow moustaches. Well, some of them can grow moustaches, anyway.

Leighanne M is going to kick things off for us, with this pair of pics of Bert and Ernie she made when she was 4 and 5, respectively.


Regarding the caption on that first picture, Leighanne offers this word of explanation: “I made Ernie’s and Bert’s torsos way too long so I solved the problem by calling them worms. Imagine the Muppet News Flash that would've ensued if Bernice the pigeon were a wormivore.” Leighanne called the second picture “Sharing Schmaring,” and I think it’s a pretty good snapshot of our favorite odd couple.

Hey, I like Sesame Street characters. Let’s see some more. Here’s Mary Catherine O's Big Bird, drawn when she was around 5 years old.


The cool thing about this picture is that it’s a great recreation of an illustration in The Sesame Street ABC Storybook, from a story in which a knightly Big Bird is searching the kingdom for things that begin with the letter A... or possibly for foods which keep the doctor away, I'm not sure which.

Speaking of Sesame characters and books, when Michael H was 7, he affectionately paid homage to – or as he puts it, “blatantly plagiarized” – the literary classic Oscar's Book by creating this three-page work.


It’s powerful stuff. When Oscar begs you not to look at the book on the first page, it only ensures that you must dare to look at the second page, where he begins to warn you that the book will make you crazy, only to think better of it and declare that it’ll make you crazy.


Finally, he asks you to play “mud drag,” whatever that is (the artist has no recollection as to its significance). And you’re right there with him.

It’s a pretty ambitious work, but Michael wasn’t the only one experimenting with long form techniques as a kid. Here’s another selection from 5-year-old Mary Catherine. It’s her adaptation of A Muppet Christmas Carol, complete with “Miss Piggy twins.”


Now I’m going to force you to look at another one of my own childhood drawings. It’s Rowlf the Dog, drawn around the same time as the Kermit I showed you in this original post. (And most likely on the very same day – I work fast when I’m inspired.)

Go for it, Rowlf! Play the heck out of that tiny piano with your differently sized arms!

Here’s something different. When Josh H was 13, he took shop class, where he was assigned to create a shelf. When the teacher said the shelf could take any shape, Josh says his “Muppet senses kicked in, and a light bulb went off,” and he knew he had to make the class’s only Gonzo shelf. Nine weeks later, he had this lovely piece:


Shifting our attention now from Gonzo to Gobo, here are some Fraggle Rock watercolors painted by Justin P way back when he was only three years old. The first one is Gobo flanked by Red and Mokey, and the second one is Pa Gorg.


I’m pretty sure Pa is dancing there. For more Fraggles, we turn back to Leighanne, who drew individual portraits of the show’s main characters.



I think seven-year-old Leighanne could have gotten a job as a portrait artist at Six Flags Over Fraggle Rock.

Wow. Lots of great pictures. But we’re not done yet! Here’s another one from the prolific Mary Catherine – it’s an adorable rendering captioned “One day, Kermit asked Miss Piggy to go to the prom with him.”


After seeing that, I can only assume Piggy is wearing her prom dress is Mary Catherine’s next picture.


And finally, let’s close things out with Stevie B’s shot of the Muppet Show cast, drawn when Stevie was five.


If that picture doesn’t make you smile, you need to pay a visit to the smile repair shop as soon as possible. And that’s what this whole thing was about… the Muppets make kids smile, and kids draw the Muppets, which makes everyone else smile. We all win.

Yikes… this might just be the least cynical ToughPigs.com article ever. What have I done?!

Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum! And stay tuned for a possible follow-up exhibition for grown-ups!

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Friday, May 25, 2007

 

The Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza! Part One


by Ryan Roe

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen and everyone else, to the Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza! The Tough Pigs art gallery is now officially open.

A while back, I asked for samples of Muppety art from kids past and present, and I received some really great submissions. I said “Awwwww!” many, many times while going through these pictures. In fact, I may buy a new refrigerator just so I can display all these works of art.

I’m going to divide up the pictures into categories, and post them in two separate articles, so as no to overwhelm you with cuteness. First up, some art from the kids of the 21st century.

Let’s start things off with two drawings of
Pino. Pino is Big Bird’s counterpart from the Dutch co-production of Sesame Street, and he’s rendered here by 8-year-old Ana and 7-year-old Anouk.





He certainly looks happy to have achieved the dream of seeing his name in blocks. Next up, let’s take a look at a trio of Kermits. Inspired by a Fisher-Price puppet, 8-year-old Sofie drew a Kermit who seems to be saying, “Make love, not war:”




Next, 12-year-old H. used the time-honored medium of pencil to create this Kermit:

And 12-year-old J. drew our favorite flippered fellow chillin’ in the swamp. Note the accurate depiction of Kermit playing banjo left-handed, a detail some professional illustrators don’t even get right.


Speaking of Kermit, how about a picture that tells the timeless story of love between a frog and a pig? The pig’s little doggy is there too, in this work of art by 6-year-old Gillian.


The text reads:
The Muppet Party Cruise: The Muppet Show

They love each other. They are family forever. They lived happily [ever] after.

Piggy: “I love you Kermit”
Kermit: “I love you too Piggy”
Piggy: “I love you Foo-Foo”
Foo-Foo: “roof-roof roof-roof”

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

Thank you for coming to The Muppet Show
.

A happier work of art I’ve never seen. You know what else makes me happy? The Electric Mayhem. And here they are, rendered by 8-year-old Sara. (Eight seems to be a good age for Muppet art. Maybe that’s when we reach our Muppet-drawing peak.)


I especially like Sara’s artistic choice of leaving the whole picture black and white except for Dr. Teeth’s gold tooth. Very striking. Also: Just how cool is Floyd? He’s so cool he can play in the band without his bass. Continuing with Sara’s theme of Muppet Show musicians, here’s Rowlf, joined by some singing chickens.


Say, those are some nice-looking Muppet chickens. It’s a good thing, then, that Sara continued the Chicken Period of her career with this flattering portrait of Camilla.


Among the e-mails I received in response to the call for entries was one from a Mr. Hai hoa, who writes:

“hihihihi”

Well hello to you too, buddy, but I’m afraid you forgot to include any Muppet art. Maybe next time get your kid to whip up a picture of
Harvey Kneeslapper, or something.

Let’s close out this category of the exhibition with a series of Sesame Street character studies by 5-year-old Miles. First up, two Caroll Spinney characters – Shivers the Penguin and Bennett Snerf. Just kidding! It’s Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch.


That’s a nest of baby birds accompanying Big Bird there. Perhaps he’s babysitting for his
Uncle Slim. Next, Miles gives us one of the biggest Sesame characters and one of the smallest. It’s Snuffy (joined by a baby snuffleupagus) and Slimey (puppet wire included).


Finally, here’s an image I’d like to have on a T-shirt: It’s Miles’ depiction of Cookie Monster.


What’s the matter with kids today? Not a thing, judging by these fantastic pictures. Muppet fan spirit is alive and well in the current generation, and I don’t know about you, but that gives me hope for the future of mankind.

Now that we’ve been amazed and inspired by those works of art, here’s some silly stuff just for fun. When I posted the call for entries, I suggested that those without access to pictures by actual kids could create some new artwork using kid-inspired techniques. I got a handful of entries… all of which came from my friends from the
Tough Pigs forum… and myself. But here they are.

I want to mention that the next ten pictures you’ll see here were drawn wrong-handed, to simulate childhood motor functions, thus ensuring authenticity. Here’s a Sam the Eagle, drawn by me. In the interest of maintaining the joke, I’m going to say that I was eight when I drew this.


Here’s an obscure character and an old favorite –
Marlon Fraggle from Fraggle Rock and Scooter. I’ll say I was 10 and 12, respectively, when I drew these.


And here’s my portrait of the Count with his girlfriend,
the Countess. I think this looks like the work of a 5-year-old Ryan.


Next up, a series of fake childhood drawings by Joe. Here are three monsters – Cookie Monster, Telly, and a very specific
Beautiful Day Monster (from a season one Bert & Ernie sketch.)


And here's fake young Joe's take on a Honker:


And now, from Michal, here are three Sesame Street characters: Herry, Guy Smiley, and Lefty the salesman.


And here’s Michal’s crayon drawing of a Doozer. It’s worth noting that Michal drew this upside-down in order to further the kid aesthetic.


Finally, we’ll close out this category with Shawn’s vibrant portrait of Kremit. I mean, Kermit.

I’m not sure whether Shawn used his right hand or his wrong hand to create that, but it captures the kid aesthetic nicely.

That’s it for part one, but click here for part two, featuring lots of great vintage fan art by kid Muppet fans who have since grown up to become mature, well-adjusted grown-ups who occasionally sing Rubber Duckie in their cars.

Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Tuesday, May 22, 2007

 

Your Muppet Horoscope


by Shawn Pero


Come with me as I gaze into the Muppet crystal! The way this works, is, you tell me when you were born, and I will use my powers of prognostication to tell you your destiny based on that the Muppets were doing in the year of your birth. Just call me Madame Shawn! Except, don't call me that.

Your results may vary. Side effects include people knowing how old you are, flashbacks to your childhood, or general ennui. As with all prescription horoscopes and fortune-telling, please consult with your family medium or religious leader.


Joe H.

Birthdate: January 1, 1982
Sign: The Dark Crystal

Joe, you were born under the dark sign of The Dark Crystal, which premiered in 1982. Which automatically makes your birthstone Dark Crystal, but it'll be tough finding a miniature plush teddy bear with a necklace that includes a piece at convenience stores.

Your personality: Unfortunately, this truly is a dark sign - you are tedious, and possibly too smart for your own good. You look pretty, though.

Your future: College kids will gather around you while high.


Michal R.


Birthdate: November 4, 1983
Sign: Fraggle Rock

Michal, you were born under the whimsical sign of Fraggle Rock, which premiered in the year of your birth.

Your personality: Michals are a noble race - fearless, dignified, and intellectual. They represent the very pinnacle of civilization and culture. A Michal is most assuredly the best of all possible creatures.

Your future: That movie deal you've been hoping for? Don't hold your breath.


Andrew L.

Birthdate: October 23, 1980
Sign: Shirley Bassey

Andrew, your sign is the Shirley Bassey episode of The Muppet Show, where she performed "Goldfinger".

Your personality: Everything about you shines, and people are always trying to... uh... steal you? Um, the crystal is fading, faaaadinggg...

Your future: You will become either a Bond villain or a Bond girl. Your pick.


Mary Catherine O.

Birthdate: February 9, 1988
Sign: Croonchy Stars

Mary Cate, you were born under the auspicious (and delicious!) Croonchy Star.

Your personality: You are both sweet and entertaining, like the cereal and the box it came in.

Your future: People will spend their entire adult lives trying to remember what you were like. Were you like Apple Jacks? Kinda. Yeah, let's say Apple Jacks. Croonchy Stars weren't around long but are fondly remembered. Not saying that should mean anything to you, just keep it in mind.


Catherine W.

Birthdate: November 14, 1975
Sign: Cher

Cathy, you were born under the star of Cher, whose show featured the Muppets on November 16th of your birth year.

Your personality: You believe in life after love.

Your future: Gay men will inexplicably worship you for many, many years. And apparently humor writers will exploit your very tenuous Muppet connections.


Elizabeth Anne E.

Birthdate: November 20, 1984
Sign: Lovable Furry Old Grover's Resting Places

Elizabeth, your sign is one of stability and comfort, as shown by the book Lovable Furry Old Grover's Resting Places, which featured a number of Grover's favorite 'resting spots' - colored spots on the pages you can rest yourself on.

Your personality: You always offer people a shoulder to lean on. And luckily for them, it's designated by a brightly colored circle, so they know just where to lean.

Your future: Get used to people pressing their body parts up against you.


Alaina B.

Birthdate: September 19, 1984
Sign: The Muppet Show On Tour

Alaina, your sign is an enigmatic one - The Muppet Show On Tour live show.

Your personality: You are like the wind, never putting down roots, flitting from place to place. Yet you create much anticipation and always leave people with a smile.

Your future: People will remark that you're a good five feet taller than you look on TV.


David B.

Birthdate: January 28, 1982
Sign: The Twiddlebug Game

David, your sign is The Twiddlebug Game, a Sesame Street-themed card game.

Your personality: Everyone loves you, David, because you're such a card! Get it? Because... because of the... you know... right?

Your future: Look, man, I'm really sorry about that joke. We cool?


Kellie B.

Birthdate: October 3, 1973
Sign: Sesamstrasse

Kellie, Ihr Zeichen ist Sesamstrasse, die deutsche Sesamkoproduktion, die 1973 anfing.

Your personality: Sie sind recognizeable aber zu Ihrem amerikanischen Selbst unterschiedlich, aber gerade, wie geliebt außer dieser rosafarbenen Schnecke. Dieses Kerls sonderbar, Mannes.

Your future: Sorgen Sie nicht sich um es - ich bezweifele jedermann, das geht, zu versuchen und darzustellen aus, was dieses sagt.


Peter P.


Birthdate: April 30, 1979
Sign: Shields & Yarnell

Peter, your sign is another enigmatic one: the Shields & Yarnell episode of The Muppet Show, which aired in October of 1979.

Your personality: Who the hell are Shields & Yarnell? Weren't they that campy pop duo? Oh, no, wait, that's The Captain & Tennille.

Your future: Hold on, I need to look this up. Okay, it says that Shields & Yarnell were mimes. Huh. Well, alright. You will be very quiet.


Anthony S.

Birthdate: December 30, 1984
Sigh - Another person born in 1984?

Man, you guys. There's only so much that happened in 1984 with the Muppets, you know? Unless you want to be another Sesame Street book.

Your personality: Okay, you know what? You're Muppet Babies. How do you like that? Maybe next time you won't be so born in 1984.

Your future: You will feel slighted by fortune tellers.

Want to have your Muppet Horoscope told? Let us know at the Tough Pigs forums!

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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

 

REMINDER: Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza


by Ryan Roe


This is another quick reminder that the deadline for the Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza is coming up next Monday, April 30. For guidelines on submissions, see this article.

Don't forget, if you don't have any Muppet fan art drawn by your younger self or a kid you know, you can create some new art in kid style for exhibition in a separate category.

The entries are looking great so far, so don't delay, send your li'l Muppet fan art to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com today!

Join us in talking about this over at the Tough Pigs forum.

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Monday, April 16, 2007

 

REMINDER: Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza


by Ryan Roe


This is just a quick reminder that the deadline for the Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza is Monday, April 30, two weeks from today. For the details on submission guidelines, see this earlier article.

We've gotten some great entries so far, including some Fraggle Rock, Sesame Street and Muppet Show art. So keep 'em coming! Send your kiddie Muppet fan art to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com today!

We're talking about this over at the Tough Pigs forum.

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Monday, April 9, 2007

 

CALL FOR ENTRIES: The Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza!


by Ryan Roe


I was just admiring this picture I drew of Kermit the Frog, back when I was about ten years old, and it gave me an idea. Surely I can’t be the only one who’s held onto his old work. There must be other Muppet fans whose childhood artwork was preserved for posterity after it came off the refrigerator, and I know there are some youngsters out there today with a few Muppety drawings in their tiny portfolios.

There’s something pretty wonderful about kid fan art. Just look at that Kermit drawing! I approached it with pure enthusiasm for the subject. I loved Kermit, he had given me a lot of happiness, and I wanted to return the favor by capturing that happiness in a likeness of him. The picture was drawn in pencil, but innocence was the true medium.

Or maybe that’s all a load of hooey and it’s just a chubby Kermit with tiny arms and an inexplicably white collar.

Either way, the fact remains that kid fan art is neato with a capital O. With that in mind, I’d like to announce a call for entries for a new, exciting, and extremely cute exhibition: The Young Muppet Fans Art Extravaganza! If you have any Muppet-related drawings, paintings, or sculptures created by kids, scan them or take photos of them, and e-mail them to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com.

Here are a few guidelines, because, let’s face it, you gotta have guidelines or you end up with pure chaos:

•Kid Muppet fan artwork must have been created by a child 13 years old or younger. Big kids’ art is tainted by the bitter, jaded worldview they inevitably develop starting on their 13th birthday.

•If you don’t have any of your own old work, you could submit some art by a kid in your life… your offspring, relatives, students, whatever. I’d love to see some contemporary Sesame Street works or some Bear in the Big Blue House art in amongst all the old Muppet Show stuff.

•If you don’t have any old work of your own, and you don’t know any children, I will allow submissions created in the style of a child for a separate exhibition category, preferably using one of these media: crayon, non-toxic markers, finger paint, or Play-Doh. For extra childlike authenticity, I recommend using your non-dominant hand. So if you’re right-handed, try drawing with your left hand, and vice versa.

•The deadline for entries is April 30, three weeks from today. That should give you plenty of time, right? I’ll post weekly reminders here until then.

Again, you can send your entries to ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com. I’m really looking forward to seeing what kind of art comes in. I’m sure we’ll get some masterpieces, and once they’re exhibited, the art world will never be the same.

Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Tuesday, March 27, 2007

 

One Muppet, One Joke


by Ryan Roe


Many of our favorite Muppets are well-developed, fleshed-out characters, especially when you consider that they're funny talking animals. Kermit the Frog, for example, is a complex figure with hopes and dreams, as well as insecurities and a serious aversion to commitment.

But not all Muppets are as deep as the frog. Many characters were designed with no more than a single gimmick to define their personality and justify their existence. Call them "one-joke wonders," if you will. (If you won't, that's fine too.) I’d like to take a gander at these one-trick ponies and determine which ones worked and which ones didn’t.

Before I begin, I’d like to point out that although I’m considering any number of characters who only do one thing, I have two criteria: 1) They have to be regulars or recurring on a TV series, and 2) They have to be Muppets. So Jim Henson Hour guest star Louie Anderson doesn’t qualify. Also, although I’ve opted not to link everything, you can find more information about all these characters on
Muppet Wiki, the one-stop spot for all your Muppet research needs.



The character: Forgetful Jones, performed by Richard Hunt on Sesame Street
The joke: Have you ever walked into a room and forgotten why? This well-meaning but absent-minded cowboy does that all the time, but he’s just as apt to forget how to get out of the room once he’s there. It’s never explained why a cowboy is hanging out on an inner-city street, though it makes about as much sense as a
W.C. Fields-voiced magician or an opera-singing flamingo.
Characteristic appearance: When Forgetful called his cousin to wish her a happy birthday, he forgot who he calling, and why he was calling, and his name.
Career highlight: Forgetful starred in a film version of the musical Oklahoma, in which he was to sing the song “Oklahoma.” He did fine, except for the part where he forgot how to pronounce the word “Oklahoma.”
Funny? Yes. Richard Hunt took a simple character (previously performed by Michael Earl Davis) and made his chronic short-term memory loss not only entertaining, but endearing. His mustache is pretty funny too.
Did he get to stick around? According to Muppet Wiki, Forgetful appeared on Sesame Street for about 14 years, which is a pretty good run. Sadly, he hasn’t been seen since Hunt’s death in 1992. Still, there’s one more important thing I’d like to say about Forgetful Jones, but I can’t for the life of me remember what it is.


The character: Bill the Bubble Guy, performed by Dave Goelz on Muppets Tonight
The joke: Bubbles come out of his head. And he tap dances! No, I’m sorry, that’s a lie. Bubbles come out of his head. That’s it.
Characteristic appearance: In the Sandra Bullock episode, Bill blew bubbles to the accompaniment of “Flight of the Bumblebee.”
Career highlight: Bill was a cast member of the MTV reality spoof sketch The Real World Muppets. I don’t remember much about what happened in that bit, but I seem to recall that some bubbles came out of his head.
Funny? Eh, sorta. But Bill had no personality beyond his gimmick, so he wasn’t very lovable. The puppet wasn’t very distinctive either – take away the bubbles and he’s just a plain old Whatnot. Even if the series had been a hit, we probably wouldn’t have seen a Bill the Bubble Guy Action Bubble Blaster toy.
Did he stick around? He made frequent appearances on Muppets Tonight, but he hasn’t been seen since. Still, as long as we have our old tapes of the show, Bill is forever blowing bubbles.



The character: Lew Zealand, performed by Jerry Nelson on The Muppet Show
The joke: Boomerang fish! As the man says, he throws the fish away, and they come back to him! America’s Got Talent would kill for an act like this.
Characteristic appearance: On the Leslie Uggams episode, Lew threw boomerang fish while Uggams sang “Here You Come Again.”
Career highlight: In The Muppets Take Manhattan, Lew unleashed his fish on an entire unsuspecting audience at a 3-D monster movie.
Funny? Heck yeah! This is the right way to do a one-joke character. With his clownish yet appealing appearance and his silly, upbeat personality, Lew Zealand rises above his pun name to fishy greatness. Lew would occasionally perform other seafood-related acts in later Muppet Show episodes, but the boomerang bit has always been his primary fish shtick.
Did he stick around? You bet. Lew’s shown up in all the major Muppet movies, right up to 2005’s Muppets’ Wizard of Oz. He even got his own action figure, which means he can have swordfish-to-lightsaber duels with Darth Vader, which is approximately the raddest thing I can think of.



The character: Professor Hastings, performed by Frank Oz on Sesame Street
The joke: Professor Hastings, the famous scholar and lecturer, can never make it through a speech without falling asleep. This character provided a way for kids to learn about the alphabet and narcolepsy at the same time!
Characteristic appearance: The prof gives a talk about the letter Y. And falls asleep. Maybe he should have talked about the letter Zzzzz….
Career highlight: On the Sesame Street record Sing the Alphabet, Professor Hastings gets to sing a song about the letter U, but Ernie has to wake him up every time he dozes off. (This is also notable for being perhaps the only Sesame Street to include the word “undulate.”)
Funny? Hmm… It was a fun idea for a sketch or two, but the joke would have gone really stale really quickly had Professor Hastings been on the show much longer. Which brings me to…
Did he stick around? I hope Professor Hastings had tenure at his university job, because he was phased out of Sesame Street after season one. However, I hear he’s hugely popular in Europe.



The character: Henchy Fraggle, performed by John Pattison on Fraggle Rock
The joke: Henchy is a personal assistant to the World’s Oldest Fraggle. He exists mainly to correct the old geezer when he says something wrong, then get bonked on the head by him.
Characteristic appearance: The episode “Capture the Moon” was his first, and it set the standard for things to come.
Career highlight: Henchy plays a larger role than usual in the episode “Inspector Red,” but to say more about it would constitute a spoiler, and I abhor spoilers. I’ll give you a hint: The episode does not involve Henchy getting locked in a walk-in freezer.
Funny? Funny enough. Henchy is minor enough in prominence and appears infrequently enough that watching him get bopped on the noggin always brings a chuckle. Or perhaps I just enjoy seeing people get hit in the head when those people are not me.
Did he stick around? Henchy showed up here and there throughout the run of Fraggle Rock. Most, if not all, of his appearances were in the company of his elderly boss.



The characters: The Talking Houses, performed by various puppeteers on The Muppet Show
The joke: The houses appeared in sketches which always followed the same formula: House A makes a statement about a relative, House B asks for more information, and House A delivers a building-related punchline. You can write a Talking Houses sketch yourself, if you ever have ten seconds to spare.
Characteristic appearance: From the Paul Williams episode: One house mentions that his mother is very religious. Is she a fanatic? No, she’s a church.
Career highlight: Um… well, there was that one time when the third and fourth houses talked instead of the first and second ones. That was exciting.
Funny? The first time or two, it’s mildly amusing. After that, you can see the punchlines coming, and even predict them if you have a finely-honed sense of comedy like my own. However, I do like their brief but zippy little musical theme.
Did they stick around? After season one, the Talking Houses moved out of the Muppet Show neighborhood.



The character: Count von Count, performed by Jerry Nelson on Sesame Street
The joke: He looks kinda like Dracula, and he’s obsessed with counting everything he sees. What kind of crazy idea is that for a character?
Characteristic appearance: When Big Bird showed the Count his new pet turtle, the Count immediately counted the turtle (one), then counted the spots on its shell (twelve).
Career highlight: I’m going to go with the song “Lambaba,” partially because the Count has so much fun counting the sheep that dance around his room, but mostly because it’s a really catchy song.
Funny? The Count’s number fixation is always good for a smile, if not a belly laugh. Even though you know he’s going to count everything he sees, it’s supremely satisfying to watch him do it, especially when it’s accompanied by the traditional trademark thunder.
Did he stick around? The Count first popped up in season four of Sesame Street, and he’s still counting things as the show prepares for season 38. His enduring popularity is a testament to the skill of his performer, as well as to the writers who keep coming up with new things for him to count after all these years. He’s such a part of the pop culture consciousness that if you count something in a Transylvanian accent at work or school tomorrow, I guarantee somebody will respond with an “AH-ah-ah-ah!” If it doesn’t work, I’ll cheerfully refund your money.

There are many more one-joke wonders, some who made the cut and became favorites, and some who faded into obscurity (Are there any Leo the Party Monster fans in the house?). Maybe I’ll write about them someday.

How does a limited character find staying power? A good performance is crucial (being puppeteered by Jerry Nelson seems to be particularly useful), and it helps to have a gimmick that allows some room for variation. I always thought Bill the Bubble Guy would have been funnier if other things would come out of his head -- Ping-Pong balls, feathers, strawberry NesQuik. Sometimes a one-joke Muppet can evolve into something far greater. I think a case could be made for Fozzie (an unfunny comedian) and Gonzo (a performer of bizarre stunts) as initial one-jokers, but they ended up rising above their early defining traits to become well-developed Muppet superstars.

Which brings me to my next point in this essay: One of the most indispensible elements of any episodic teleplay is the comedic interaction between... between... be...twee... ZZZZZZZZZZZZ


Who’s your favorite one-joke Muppet? Click here to discuss this article at the Tough Pigs forum!

ToughPigsRyan@yahoo.com

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Saturday, March 17, 2007

 

Shimmelfinney, We Hardly Seen Ye


by Joe Hennes


Amidst the magic of Fraggle Rock, there is an unseen force. An invisible power that looms over the entire show, its characters, and all that goes with it. Not much is known about this obscured, shadowy figure. Some might even say that he’s “outta sight.” Wow, not even the North American Society of Tinkerers will forgive me for that one.

The translucent gentleman I’m speaking of is Ned Shimmelfinney. Mr. Shimmelfinney has been a large part of more Fraggle Rock B-plots than the Trash Heap herself. He’s tormented Doc to the point of utter insanity and he is loathed (for the most part) by Doc’s faithful ward, Sprocket. But we have never seen Mr. Shimmelfinney, nor have we seen more than a glimpse of his remarkably spry cat, Fluffinella. Why must this incredibly important character be reduced to the likes of Vera Peterson, Charlie, and the lower half of Wilson’s face?

To learn who Ned Shimmelfinney is, we must delve deep into his past. We’ve got to see what makes this guy tick. Travel back in time with me to 1982, when men were men, Time Magazine awards a friggin’ computer as Man of the Year, and Canadian-American film actress Margot Kidder is at the youthful age of 34. In the rolling hills of Dale City, Virginia, 6-year old Kati was a dedicated Muppet Show viewer, as well as a member of the Muppet Show Fan Club. As the show’s run came to an end, so did the Fan Club newsletters. Shortly before the final issue was released, Kati’s parents got a phone call from someone from Henson Associates. They saw Kati’s name on the subscription list and wanted to know how to pronounce the surname and what its origins are. Kati’s last name? Schimelpfenig.

While the story is 100% true, there’s no way to know for sure if the reason for the call was to get an idea for a Fraggle Rock character’s name. Although when Kati and her parents first saw Sprocket’s Shimmelfinney impression, it was hard to think that the phone call was for any other reason.

So why do we love Ned Shimmelfinney like we do? Is it because he reminds us of our subconscious id? Or the neighbor to our subconscious id? Or maybe we all just really like a good pie-in-the-face gag. I like to think it’s because someone, maybe Jerry Juhl or even Jim Henson himself, reached out to the people most important to the Muppets, the fans, and paid homage to us through one little Virginia girl.

Ned Shimmelfinney was born from you and me.

Click here to discuss this article on the Tough Pigs forum!

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Thursday, February 22, 2007

 

Can You Tell Me How To Get, How To Get My Prescription Medication?


by Shawn Pero

True story: At the Archives for National Public Broadcasting (located at the University of Maryland) there are thousands of files from The Children's Television Workshop, many specifically relating to Sesame Street. Recently I spent a day (a holiday) in Maryland browsing through the archives with some friends, because we are in actuality the most boring people who have ever walked upon the Lord's green Earth. These archives include everything from budgetary memos to character and set designs for the Muppets to press clippings from the show's earliest years. Try to contain your excitement! There are also letters from fans.

Any television show will get viewer mail, and for a show as famous as Sesame Street, there's bound to be a lot of it. As you can imagine, most of the viewer mail sent to Sesame Workshop for Sesame Street is from grateful parents letting the staff know they're doing a good job and from kids who want to send warm wishes to their favorite denizens of the Street.

These are not those letters. These are from people who, at best, possibly had only the most tenuous grip on sanity. And it was the '70's, so that's saying something.

Surfacing, dusty and nursing many a paper cut, I bring to you some choice fan letters from the first few seasons of Sesame Street, from when the concept was new and people were getting their first look at a groundbreaking, fresh way to teach children. The reaction? Well, to judge by these letters, it was to first (I imagine) wipe away the drool. Then haul out the trusty old Royal typewriter and set to work.

And because we here at Tough Pigs believe in returning something to the community, I'm going to finally answer some of these letters, even though I have no actual connection to Sesame Workshop, and despite the fact that some of the people who wrote these might be technically dead. Don't thank me; it's my civic duty. The names of the writers have been changed to protect the innocent (unless those names are really funny, then I'm keeping 'em.)

Let's start off with a simple one. A Mr. Bibula (And Family) writes:

We are regular Sesame Street watchers [...] However, we were shocked by possibly the most tasteless routines ever created by you in the persons of Larry and Phyllis. The two skits were 1) oomph-beep-beep and 2) the picture hanging. While the theme of cooperation is an admirable one, the approaches demonstrated by these skits were unbelievably crude.

Ah, yes, the shocking "Oomph-Beep-Beep" skit. Legendary in the fact that it brought hard-core frontal nudity to television in the 1970's.

Well, no, actually. It mostly featured two people sitting on a couch making silly noises. I can only imagine what this person thinks of The Jerry Springer Show. My prediction: their face melted clean off their head the first time they heard "Oh No You Di'int".

This excerpt from another letter displays a similar sensibility:

We have noticed even on the program "Sesame Street" designed for pre-school children that there is an occasional indecently-dressed person and a large number of euphemisms such as "I'll be darned" which is of course a euphemism for "I'll be damned". Also "gee" which is a euphemism for Jesus. "My gosh" which is a euphemism for "My God". [...] We request that a conscientious effort be made to eliminate all vulgarity from your programs, whether it be dressed in the form of song or language or even undressed as a human body.

Well, shit. I'm sure as hell sorry for all the damn foul language. And I guess I spoke too soon about the frontal nudity thing from before.

No, for real. I like how you were being clever with the whole 'dressed/undressed' thing you were going for there. That's quality complaint-lettering, that is.

Next up:

Dear Sirs,
I think there should still be books read on Sesame. I think you are a stupid ass for not reading books any more.


Whoa! Okay, so hopefully you were placated by Reading Rainbow. What's interesting is that while this letter is neatly typewritten, it's signed with the name SUSAN scrawled diagonally down the length of the rest of the page in shaky handwriting. Yeah, it could've been dictated to a parent by a kid, but then why are you letting your kid call someone on Sesame Street an ass? I really hope the person who wrote this letter never corresponded with the person who wrote the letter above.

And speaking of unbelievably crude:

To Whoever Is Thoughtful Enough To Mail Me A Prompt Reply,

Could you please answer the following questions for me:
- Has Molly become addicted to snorting nasal mists? Is that why she had to give up her postal route?

- In regard to the number of Kikes, Niggers, Spics, etc. that predominate the cast of your show, could we please have more of them? Was Raoul deported?

- Could you please tell everyone in the neighborhood to be kinder to Big Bird? He takes a lot of crap, especially from Maria.

Another loyal fan and dedicated teacher.


Wow. Teacher huh? Okay. Well, in response to your questions, Molly the Mail Lady was played by Charlotte Rae. Upon leaving the cast of Sesame Street, she opened and became the headmistress of a girls' school in Peekskill, New York. Although your 'nasal mist' theory is as good a reason as any for why she acts like that.

The character Rafael was played by Raul Julia. He later became a goth and then an accomplished street fighter.

Yeah, Big Bird does take a lot of crap, doesn't he? Well, don't you worry - you don't stay an eight foot tall bird for long without learning a trick or two. There was an... incident. Suffice to say Maria doesn't give Big Bird a hard time any more.

Sesame Street is, as you know, dedicated to showcasing diversity in its cast. As you have no doubt seen, additions to the cast have included wetbacks, chinks and even retards! In the future it's possible you might see a fag or a dyke!

Speaking of departed cast members:

Please tell me what happened to my old friends. Did God take the 'old' Gordon & Molly & Rafael up to the clouds because they got bad boo-boos when they ran across the street and got hit by a truck like my kitty-cat, Friend? My Mummy says they didn't go up in the sky but she can't tell me where they went. Can you?

They're, uh, they're on a farm. Yeah, that's right. A great, big farm where they can run and play as much as they want. Lots of rabbits to chase. And they have a nice spot by the fire to sleep in, too.

From an irate viewer:

I'm real pissed off cause no one sees the Snuffleupagus. If someone besides the kids don't see him I quit watching & I won't give any support. So the choice is yours.

This person grew up to write some of the greatest internet petitions of all time.

Then we have a frustrated Mom:

I would like to see Cookie Monster changed to Apple Freak or Fruit Monster. It is an unusual cookie that is better than a piece of fruit. Making children think cookies are fun to eat isn't fair to us mothers. I hope some consideration is given to this

And thus we have everyone's favorite Sesame character: Apple Freak.

Lastly:

Do you know what an "around down up, down* and a monkey tail", is? You should!! it would add new demensions (sic) to your program.

What do you even say to that? Oh, wait, I know:

You're absolutely right! These new demensions are mind blowing. I also now know that around the corner fudge is made. Well, it was until 1986 at least - that business closed down. Now it's a shoe store, I think.

*Also: Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Select and Start. 30 lives!

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